Archives for April 2012

I have a friend who has a problem with the men she dates. No matter how carefully she chooses, she ends up with men who exhibit the same set of personality flaws — and who have the same tendency to deprive her of what she needs emotionally.

Each time it happens, she thinks she understands how it happened and how to avoid it next time. So she consciously sets out to avoid what she had before and she rationally evaluates what she wants — only to find out that the same essential latent characteristics come out in the next boyfriend. And she has no idea how this keeps happening.

I’ve been thinking about this for several days, starting very early Thursday morning. Somewhere in the neighborhood of 4:30 a.m., I woke up with a thought and I couldn’t go back to sleep. After turning the thought over in my head again and again for awhile, I decided to type it on my iPhone so I could think about it in the morning. As I was about to type it, I decided to throw it out there to Facebook to see if anybody had any thoughts about it. Here’s what my sleep-adled brain typed from bed:

I wonder whether some of us are more frightened by the prospects of good things happening in our lives than we are of bad things. Not consciously, of course, but do some people become so accustomed to disappointment that the notion of happiness is unconsciously scary?

Since it was so early, I didn’t think anybody would see it or comment on it, but I was mistaken. It seems as though a number of people had interesting thoughts about it. And my mind has been chewing on the issue ever since.

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Even though he wasn’t under the influence of any substance, the knight knew that he had never been able to move in a straight line, so he was in trouble.

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After UC-Davis Police Lt. John Pike was shown pepper-spraying peaceful students five months ago, the biggest question on the minds of some people was how quickly the guy would be fired. Due to union rules, though, Pike is still on the job and it’s unlikely he’ll ever be fired.

It was pretty clear to anybody who watched the initial video that Pike was way out of line, but it’s become clear since then that he and the school were even more in the wrong than we realized at the time. In fact, the official investigation into the incident shows that there wasn’t even any legal basis for police or college officials to demand the students leave the school’s quad.

At the time, we all thought the students were engaging in civil disobedience. The actions of Pike and other police that day were clearly excessive, but we assumed that the order to disperse was legal. It turns out that it wasn’t even a legal order. So there wasn’t a legal basis for asking the students to leave and the official report faults Pike with bad judgement and unprofessionalism for the pepper-spraying and other things that day. So why is he still employed?

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