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The shocking results are in: Here are the most popular posts from Year 1

By David McElroy · May 13, 2012

The voting was tight, but the judges were fair. There were no hanging chads and no spoiled ballots. In honor of the site’s first birthday, here are the posts that got the most readers over the past year. A few of them still have me scratching my head.

‘I’m just quitting’: A scene right out of ‘Atlas Shrugged’ in Birmingham — The most popular story on the site in the first year was read more than 50,000 times. When I started, I wasn’t sure I’d have 50,000 views for the entire year put together, so this was gratifying. I happened to attend a public hearing about environmental issues, because I was doing some research that I didn’t think would turn into a story. But I wasn’t counting on an angry coal mine operator to tell the environmental officials that he wasn’t going to open a mine he had planned — because of the attitudes he saw in the meeting that made him believe people didn’t want him. The comments posted after the story are amazing and heartbreaking in some cases, as people give their own stories about having businesses hurt by the government.

The story was picked up by Instapundit, The Blaze, Free Republic, Fark, Reddit and dozens of other sites. For a few days, it was viral. This one story contributed hugely to increasing overall daily traffic on the site immensely. (Here’s an interview that a radio station in Indianapolis did with me about the story. I wasn’t happy with the interview, but it was my first radio appearance in years, so I wasn’t too upset.)

Does this woman have the right to eat herself to death? Yes, she does — The second most popular story is one that I never quite understood. It’s a story I almost didn’t do, because … well … it’s a stretch to turn it into something appropriate for the site. It was just too interesting for me to leave it alone. It was popular at the time, but it’s had an especially strong life since then. People seem to frequently find it by searching for things such as “world’s most fat woman.” I can’t say it’s a story I’m especially proud of. It was just something fun. You never know when people are going to latch onto a story.

Why do you need a license? It’s time for separation of marriage and state — This story was just last week, but it’s already become hugely popular. Traffic was so heavy for a few days that my readership for May had already equalled the April numbers by May 10. The last time I checked, this story had been shared on Facebook more than 3,400 times. The irony is that it almost wasn’t a standalone story. I had intended it to be a short item as part of a “Notebook” article. The things I was saying seemed so obvious that there didn’t seem to be a lot to say. But it got too long to be part of a Notebook story, so I found some artwork and turned it into a standalone piece just a few minutes before it was published. That was a lucky decision.

Wishful thinking: Why Ron Paul can’t (and won’t) be elected president — People searching for opinions about whether Ron Paul can win seem to be the ones who keep reading this article. I didn’t make a lot of Paul supporters happy when I wrote it, so I don’t it’s especially popular with them, but it’s one of several articles in which I explained why neither Paul nor any libertarian can be elected president. If people choose to continue to believe in the fantasy that he can — and waste their money, time and energy on the battle — that’s their business. But he’s not going to be elected president — because people don’t want anything similar to what we want.

Ugly people sue modeling industry alleging unlawful discrimination — I can’t remember what prompted this, but it’s a satire of modern discrimination lawsuits. An association representing ugly people seems to have sued the modeling industry over its preference for attractive people. It’s been one that has continued to get links months later.

Reality check: A stupid racial prank isn’t ‘the worst thing anybody can do’ — When I did this story, I didn’t yet have the monkeys doing daily news links. If I had, it might have just been a link. But it was a standalone story about a fairly minor story from New Jersey about someone putting a prank sign up in front of some apartments owned by a black couple saying, “Whites only parking.” It was stupid for someone to do, but political correctness was leading to bizarre overreaction on the part of local officials. The woman who owned the apartments was nice enough to offer her perspective in the comments.

What’s this site all about? — This was the article from the very first week in which I tried to explain my intentions for the site. I haven’t read it in close to a year, so it’s possible that I’d modify it a bit now. I’ll have to read it sometime and see. I left a link to it on the front page so readers would have a quick way of finding out what the site’s intention is.

To become a ‘runaway slave,’ you first have to free your own thoughts — I think this was one of the first articles in which I explored the theme that we’re slaves who need to understand that we’re in captivity. Until we understand our situation — and understand that we have the right to be free — nothing is going to change. This approach really resonated with some people, but was very confusing to others. If it resonates with you, we’re probably of the same “tribe.”

Shared misery: Nobody can have air conditioning unless everyone can — A friend of mine was applying to admission at a prestigious East Coast college and he related to me his experience when visiting the place. Some of the dorms have air conditioning, but the older ones don’t. The university administration won’t allow any of the dorms to use their air conditioners — until all of the dorms are air conditioned. It’s a perfect example of the modern progressive left mindset in education.

Be very afraid of men (or women) who question your patriotism — I never expect a story rooted in history to be very popular, but this one turned out to catch people’s attention. It’s about comments made by Hermann Goering while he was in prison after World War II. He understood how was was used by governments to control people. When I first read the quote from Goering that led to the story, I thought it must be faked, but it turned out to be true. It’s a perfect illustration of how patriotism is used today to control people.

NEWS LINKS: Obama signs bill allowing military arrest without trial — It was a shock for this to make the top dozen. It’s just a daily news links collection, but it was popular because a lot of people seemed to be searching for information about the NDAA bill and this happened to be the day the monkeys mentioned it was signed. So I might have had 11 or the top dozen articles, but the monkeys beat me for this spot.

Libertarian freedom vs. conservative tradition leads to culture clash — There are some stories that I write quickly without a lot of thought, but this one was just the opposite. It might even be too long, but I cut it a lot to get it as short as it is. I heard a podcast of a debate between libertarian and conservative interns from the Cato Institute and the Heritage Foundation. As I listened, I found myself thinking that the differences between them weren’t really intellectual as much as cultural. It got me to thinking about the small conservative town where I went to high school — and how I never fit with the culture there. I drove up to the town and spent some time looking around and thinking about the tensions between freedom and tradition. I think the idea at the heart of the story is an important one.

So those are the most popular stories from the first year. I never dreamed I would have this many readers by the end of the first year. It’s been a pleasant surprise. I’ve had to learn a lot about what people are interested in — and what they’re not interested in. I keep trying to adjust to give readers more of what they want. We’ll see if I do a better job in Year 2.

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Alex was willing to cooperate with me for a new po Alex was willing to cooperate with me for a new portrait late Wednesday night. It’s been roughly three and a half years now since the cold night when I was able to lure him out from behind a garbage dumpster into a trap — but I don’t think he’s sorry at this point that he fell for the trick. 😺
This is the face of a man who’s thrilled that the This is the face of a man who’s thrilled that the weekend is finally here. It was a very long (and productive) week, but the time has finally come that I have time to write and read and think. Late Friday night, I’m at the McDonald’s near my house with a Diet Dr Pepper and a MacBook. For me, it’s like Cheers without the booze.
Donald Trump has figured out who to blame for the Donald Trump has figured out who to blame for the the D.C. Reflecting Pool turning green. The dastardly deed was carried out by a specially trained squad of Antifa cats trained by the Far Left. It’s not his fault. Arrest all the cats! #satire #parody
This was the sunset that faced me as I left Walmar This was the sunset that faced me as I left Walmart near my house just a few minutes ago. It was a beautiful light show for just a few minutes.
Here’s proof that reality and satire are indisting Here’s proof that reality and satire are indistinguishable these days.
This was the sunset I saw from the parking lot out This was the sunset I saw from the parking lot outside of the Walmart near my house just after the sun went down Friday evening.
This little parody was inspired by my trip to buy This little parody was inspired by my trip to buy gas a little while ago. Even at a no-name brand, the price was $4.09. If I remember correctly, it was $2.29 a gallon at the same station on the day the war started. I don’t know about you, but I’m tired of winning. 🤣
For the best and most sophisticated in lawn care, For the best and most sophisticated in lawn care, check out the sponsor of one of my upcoming YouTube video episodes. 🙃 #parody #threestooges
Have you felt as though you’re living through Grou Have you felt as though you’re living through Groundhog Day lately? Me, too. Here’s a quick-and-dirty political satire I made this evening for fun and stress relief.
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From the CritterCam: Oliver seems to have taken ov From the CritterCam: Oliver seems to have taken over the cat bed on my desk this evening. I’m betting that I’ll find Alex on top of the castle instead, but the fact that I find myself thinking about this on the way home from work says a lot about my unorthodox priorities in life. 😺
From the CritterCam: I have no idea what was outsi From the CritterCam: I have no idea what was outside an office window to catch Alex’s attention — birds, maybe? — but he briefly looked very intrigued.
By the time I got back home, it was dark outside a By the time I got back home, it was dark outside and pouring rain. Alex had taken over my chair in the bedroom. His extended paw makes him look as though he’s a weather god giving orders for the storm to go away.
Sam just posed for me in an office window. I’m nev Sam just posed for me in an office window. I’m never sure whether they’re licking their chops in this way because they’re thinking about eating me. 😺
Alex was willing to cooperate with me for a new po Alex was willing to cooperate with me for a new portrait late Wednesday night. It’s been roughly three and a half years now since the cold night when I was able to lure him out from behind a garbage dumpster into a trap — but I don’t think he’s sorry at this point that he fell for the trick. 😺
Oliver sometimes makes a trial run at finding the Oliver sometimes makes a trial run at finding the right lap spot, as he did here as soon as I changed clothes after work today.
From the CritterCam: Oliver is just relaxing in th From the CritterCam: Oliver is just relaxing in the cat bed on my desk as he watches the neighborhood on the side of the house. Even though Alex uses this bed more than the others do — by far — this was the bed that came with Oliver when he was a kitten, so he deserves to use it all he wants.
Alex can’t think of any good reason for him to be Alex can’t think of any good reason for him to be awake at 6:30 a.m., so he’s ignoring me entirely right now.
Alex and I have been spying on the neighborhood ve Alex and I have been spying on the neighborhood very late Tuesday night. I’ve been trying to get to bed since about midnight, but now that it’s 3:30 a.m., Alex and I both need to join the other boys in getting to sleep. I always like it when one of them stays up on such late nights to keep me company.
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It turns out that the radical far left has been training “Antifa cats” to sabotage anything important to Donald Trump. Everything he did was perfect. Honest. It was all the cats’ fault. Arrest all the cats! This is the latest of my ridiculous satirical shorts. Please go watch it. Then “like” it and subscribe. Please. I’m begging you. (Too much?) Although a couple of the previous videos have had views in the hundreds, most have still been seen by fewer than 20 people. So I seem to be having trouble letting people know that page exists.

Here’s the latest of my ridiculous parody shorts. It crossed my mind Tuesday to wonder what a slick and fast-talking car dealer might do right now to try to turn the high price of gasoline to his advantage. So I conceived of a fat and lovable character who tried to sell cars that don’t use any fuel — and then I started wondering if it would be funnier if all the characters were felines. Designing the King Cashpaw character took about four hours, but the rest took only another four hours, so this was a relatively quick piece that virtually wrote itself. I know it’s almost impossible for these parody videos to find a larger audience, but at least they amuse me — and there are 19 of them on my YouTube page now. The first few were very limited, but they’re getting more complex.

The Republican Party is dead. It still exists in name, of course, but it’s nothing but a shell. All that’s left are idiots and stooges and con men of the MAGA party. When Donald Trump is gone — which won’t be long — those populist idiots and pragmatic fools will have no one to follow. Democrats will thrive. They will take more power than ever and they will push the federal government further to the radical far left than ever. When that happens, don’t just blame Trump if you’re a conservative. Blame every person who has claimed to be a conservative and has given up on principles, character and everything else that Republicans once claimed to stand for. As someone who worked as a GOP political consultant for many years, this is disgusting and disturbing to me. Those who have enabled Trump to have almost unchecked power are going to be shocked when they see what they will unleash in the long run. It’s been plain all along what this narcissistic con man is. It’s your fault that you chose to pretend not to see what he really is.

We are ruled by the dumbest and most incompetent people among us — and we have a system which allows stupid and irresponsible people to force the costs of their idiocy onto smarter and wiser people. Can we get away with that? Yes, for quite some time. But we eventually reach a point at which the dumbest of the dumb — who are habitual liars and mentally ill fools — lead us to the disasters and destruction that some of us have seen coming for years. We are approaching that point. And yet most of the idiots around us still wave their rhetorical banners of support for the evil people who are leading us to ruin — and all of them point their fingers at someone else, never noticing that their own enthusiastic support of evil is to blame. When things finally fall apart, blame yourself for your blindness to the evil, not whoever happens to be in power when it happens.

I’ve been making some changes to the site lately and there are more changes coming in the days ahead, so don’t be surprised if you some small differences. This is not a wholesale redesign, but rather the addition of some features. Since they’re smarter than I am, I’ve put Oliver and Alex in charge of the technical work, which you can see in this action photo from the control room of our media complex. I recently added a series of landing pages for readers who randomly discover the site from an Internet search. I’ve also changed the YouTube link at the top of the page to go to the new YouTube channel for video essays that reflect things I’ve already published here. (Here’s a little bit about both of the YouTube channels I’m working on.) In addition, I’m trying to move away from using Instagram, so I’m experimenting with photo plug-ins that will eventually allow me to host the pictures — cats, dogs, sunsets, whatever — that I often take. So don’t be surprised to see more changes. Thanks for your patience. Let’s hope Alex and Oliver know what they’re doing.

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