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David McElroy

making sense of a dysfunctional culture

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Hidden chains need to be broken, so I’ve become a reluctant rebel

By David McElroy · November 26, 2020

I never wanted to be a rebel. I didn’t want to oppose the established order of my culture. In fact, I was raised to be a conformist.

My teachers taught me the same myths which you probably learned as a child. My country was great. Our leaders were wise. Right would prevail, because my culture stood for all that was good in the world.

Preachers and parents taught me to obey authority. They taught me to obey the rules I was given. I wasn’t taught to think for myself. I was taught to obey without question. I was trained to be a cog in a very large and well-oiled machine — one which would bring me happiness and prosperity one day.

I was happy with that picture. The world made sense to me. I had my place as a part of that culture. I would be a leader and I would one day do great things to help build the society which I had been taught to love.

But an honest man can’t close his eyes to what he’s seen. Even though it’s not convenient for me, I’ve become a rebel against a culture which binds us with hidden chains and which is leading most of us to spiritual death.

I’m a rebel against what modern culture has become, but I’m a reluctant rebel. It would be so much easier if I could go back to believing what I once believed. There would be less to struggle against if I could just be a part of that great society which I once believed I was joining.

Holidays such as Thanksgiving leave me thinking about the idealistic myths which I once believed so completely. There’s nothing wrong with Thanksgiving — either in concept or in practice — but such holidays represent what I had believed the world would be.

Days such as this still represent what I want my world to be.

I still want holidays that center around the values which I once believed my culture represented. I want them to be about family and love and good will to others.

I don’t want such days to represent consumption and angry competition and unhappiness. I don’t want them to be about hiding from unpleasant truths and even hiding from the lies on which we’ve built our lives. I don’t want them to be about squabbling relatives or hateful political arguments.

It’s impossible to live a “normal” American life and have what I want — because the culture we have built for ourselves leads inevitably to the lies and unhappiness and over-consumption which characterizes our holidays. And our entire culture.

When I first realized something was wrong in our culture, I thought we could just fix things at the edges. I thought we could reform the society by returning to what I thought the country was intended to be. But I slowly realized that even that was mistaken, because I was still relying on the dishonest old myths about what we were from the start.

I finally realized the problems were all the way at the core of what the culture is based on — and the more I studied it, the more I realized that things are getting much worse, not better.

I’ve talked with you repeatedly about rejecting Postmodern ideas and going back to the foundations of the Enlightenment. We have to go back that far to find the concepts on which a sane and moral culture can thrive in peace. You won’t find it in the dehumanization of Modernism, but you also won’t find it in the nihilistic reaction to Modernism which is Postmodernism.

Living a life which is sane and emotionally healthy by my standards has slowly become “radical” by this culture’s standards. To step back from the conformity and collectivism and nihilism demanded by this culture is now considered weird and radical.

Once you understand that — and if you want a life of meaning and love — you don’t have any choice but to become a rebel against the ugliness of what this culture has become.

I still want what I once believed my society to be. I want a culture that’s built on family and love and decency and honor. I desperately want those things — and I want to live with people who value those things as much as I do.

We can’t change this dying culture. Most people will continue to live in lies and unhappiness and nihilism. We can’t stop them.

But we can do something different. At least for ourselves.

I want to talk some more about that — about what it might look like and what it might mean — but for now, just accept that there’s an alternative.

You don’t have to live by the standards of this dying culture. You don’t have to accept screwed-up values. You don’t have to be so miserable. You don’t have to accept your children growing up to be like their peers and learning to be nihilistic consumers. If you ever see the hidden chains that bind you to all that, you won’t be able to pretend they’re not there.

The good news is that you can change all that. At least for yourself. But you have to join me. You have to become a rebel, too. You have no idea how much change we can create together.

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I had just pulled into a parking lot Friday night I had just pulled into a parking lot Friday night and was watching traffic through the distortion of the gently falling rain on my car window when I realized that the abstract view I had matched the way I was feeling tonight, so I turned it into a brief abstract video to match my mood.
Get ready for the next great animated Christmas cl Get ready for the next great animated Christmas classic, featuring singing and dancing and danger from Alex, Oliver and Sam. Coming soon to a theater near you. (The funniest part is that if I cared about this as anything more than a Christmas joke, it strikes me as something that could be profitable with the right story development and the right animators.)
Here are a couple of views of the sunset I just wa Here are a couple of views of the sunset I just watched on my way home after showing houses. I didn’t have my camera with me, so these are just iPhone shots. #nature #naturephotography #sunset #birmingham #alabama
This is what it might look like if the cats and I This is what it might look like if the cats and I were cast in a Wes Anderson film.
This is one of the funniest things that ChatGPT ha This is one of the funniest things that ChatGPT has done for me. I asked it to create a movie poster showing what a movie poster would look like for a film starring me. I told it to use my previous writings (from my website) to come up with a title and subject matter. And this is what it came up with. I can’t stop laughing. Also, the software decided on its own to included Oliver. 😺
I just noticed in the past couple of days that the I just noticed in the past couple of days that there’s suddenly far more color in the leaves of the trees, which lets me know that winter isn’t far behind. I took these two photos on a chilly Sunday afternoon nine years ago this week. #nature #naturephotography #colorful #trees #autumn #birmingham #alabama
Some of you might be aware that my dog Lucy died o Some of you might be aware that my dog Lucy died of cancer last weekend. As I’ve been grieving the loss of this beautiful and loving girl, I put together a one-minute compilation of short videos of Lucy from her first two or three weeks with me in early 2016. She was several years old at the time, but living with me provided her first stable home. She was unsure of herself at first, but she quickly developed confidence as she discovered how much she was loved. #dog #dogs #dogstagram #dogsofinstagram #cute #cutedog #pets #petstagram #petsofinstagram #instadog #ilovedogs #birmingham #alabama
Tonight’s moon is apparently something called a be Tonight’s moon is apparently something called a beaver supermoon. I noticed as I was getting home from work that it was a bright yellowish-orange, so I snapped this a couple of miles from home. It’s not a great photo, but I was pretty happy with it for an iPhone shot on the side of the road. #nature #naturephotography #sky #colorful #clouds #sunset #birmingham #alabama #iphone17pro
I’m heartbroken to tell you that I lost Lucy early I’m heartbroken to tell you that I lost Lucy early Sunday morning. The World’s Happiest Dog lived with me for 10 years, but I can’t say for sure how old she was when she came to live with me. I’ve written a brief article on my website about Lucy and what she meant to me, which you’ll find as the most recent article at davidmcelroy.org if you would be interested. (There’s a clickable link on my profile.) Like every good dog, she was “the goodest dog.” I love her dearly and I’m going to miss her fiercely. #dog #dogs #dogstagram #dogsofinstagram #cute #cutedog #pets #petstagram #petsofinstagram #instadog #ilovedogs #birmingham #alabama
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Alex and Sam are already asleep, but Oliver is han Alex and Sam are already asleep, but Oliver is hanging out in my lap late Sunday night.
Alex has already curled up in the hanging basket o Alex has already curled up in the hanging basket of his castle. He’s had a busy day and he’s ready to recharge his batteries.
Alex wants a lot of attention late Sunday afternoo Alex wants a lot of attention late Sunday afternoon, so he’s purring in my lap.
Just after midnight, Alex has retreated to the top Just after midnight, Alex has retreated to the top level of the castle to settle in for a long winter’s nap. He’s had enough of me for the night.
Alex is extremely focused when he’s playing, as he Alex is extremely focused when he’s playing, as he’s doing late Saturday night. Right now, he’s been chasing his fabric mouse that’s now old and well-chewed.
The office is mostly dark late Saturday night, but The office is mostly dark late Saturday night, but Sam is illuminated by a light over the window where he’s sitting.
I just found Sam asleep underneath my chair when I I just found Sam asleep underneath my chair when I started looking for all three of the cats to say good night. You might be able to tell that he’s barely remaining awake and seems very eager for me to let him go back to sleepy land.
I just got home at midnight and found all three of I just got home at midnight and found all three of the cats sound asleep. Alex is at the top of the castle and he’s now sat up to start giving me the cold stare to make it clear that his dinner is very late — and he’s not happy about it. He’s sleepy and he’s hungry, but hunger is going to win.
From the CritterCam: If you count the ears careful From the CritterCam: If you count the ears carefully, you’ll notice this pile of fur actually consists of three cats.
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