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David McElroy

making sense of a dysfunctional culture

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Christmas marks God’s attempt to connect us to himself and others

By David McElroy · December 24, 2020

I’ve never experienced a Christmas that felt less like Christmas than this one does.

It’s Christmas Eve, but it feels like just another gray and rainy winter day. I had some work to do at the office, but I was the only one in the building. By the time I left around 3:30 p.m., the rain had stopped and the clouds started to clear as the winds turned bitterly cold.

I didn’t want to be alone, but I couldn’t think of anywhere to be with anybody who I wanted to see. I had planned to go to a Christmas Eve service at my church. There were three services through the afternoon and evening, to accommodate the crowds and still maintain safe distances. But I suddenly realized that if I couldn’t be with a family of my own, the last thing I wanted was to see other happy and loving families together.

As I drove home — lost in thoughts of missing connection — I remembered the chapel at a monastery along my route. I wasn’t dressed appropriately, but I stopped and asked the guard at the gate whether the chapel was open. He warmly encouraged me to go right in.

“There’s a service at 8 tonight, but you’d be the only one in there right now,” he said.

There was actually one older woman in the building. Other than that, the ornate little chapel was dead silent except for the gentle hum of the heating system.

I sat alone on a back pew in the far right corner. With my head down, I thought about why I was there and why I felt such a need to find the presence of God on this lonely day.

My prayers were a jumble of feelings and hurts and needs. I grew up in a theological environment where prayer and teaching and all of our theology was extremely rational and formal and even cold. But I’m far past that. I have more questions than I ever did — and fewer certainties than I thought I had — but I know I can often find an inexplicable connection to a God who I can’t possibly explain.

As I thought about this Christmas season, I thought about the formal theology around how I had been taught the season. I also thought about the secular orgy of materialism and pleasure that it’s become for most people.

But it hit me that what we’re really celebrating is the attempt by our Creator to reach out to us and make a connection. Whatever you think about the theology of the story, the Christmas narrative is about a Creator who made human beings to be like himself — and who decided to become one of us in order to bring us together in love and save us from ourselves.

Humans tend to be so confused about what they really need. When they feel dissatisfied and unhappy, they pursue things that seem that they could help. They pursue wealth and pleasure and whatever else might make others give them honor and glory. They don’t say that’s what they’re doing, but they’re so afraid of what others think of them that they spend their lives trying to seem worthy of praise.

But none of those things create lasting satisfaction or peace. There’s still something missing. So we humans keep pushing for more — more of whatever we’ve believed would make us “good enough” — and it never seems to be enough.

As I sat in the chapel Thursday evening — with the sun sinking on the horizon outside — I found myself realizing that none of what I’ve ever done mattered insofar as meeting my real needs or giving me peace.

None of my achievements of the past mattered. None of the praise I’d had from other people. None of the money I had made and spent. None of the wins I had thought defined me. It was all meaningless.

The only thing that mattered to me — the only thing that had ever mattered — was connecting with a Creator who’s always been there for me — and connecting with others in love and peace and understanding.

Everything we believe is so important is meaningless. Our money. Our success. Our lands. Our pride. Our image in the eyes of others. All of those things are just vanity.

All that matters is love and connection — with God and with one another.

I felt God’s presence in that hour alone in the chapel. I felt his warmth and love. I was still alone in body, but it made me burn with love that I needed to share.

I don’t care what you believe about theology or God or Christmas, but I can tell you for absolute certainty that this connection — with God and with the people we need to love — are the real meaning of this old, old story.

The tale is simple. Men and woman tend to make a mess of their lives. We can’t save ourselves. But because of his love for us, God reaches down to where we are — and offers to connect us — to himself and to each other. That love and connection can save us if we allow it to.

But it’s still a choice. We can remain unbelieving and stubborn, as we live the way the world does. Or we can can choose to accept the gift he offers — and choose to love. Choose to connect.

All that the world offers is useless. Love and connection are all that matters.

Each time I realize this yet again, I’m saved from myself and from this world’s fallenness — and I’m filled with the longing to love and to connect in the way that our Creator intended.

Christmas is about God reaching out to us — by becoming one of us — to give us that connection. If we ignore that, whatever else we put in its place is empty and meaningless.

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As far as I know, there were no nuclear devices se As far as I know, there were no nuclear devices set off anywhere near Birmingham this evening, but this cloud formation looked very much like a mushroom cloud rising in the west as I went through downtown Birmingham on I-65 around 6:30 tonight. #nature #naturephotography #sky #clouds #birmingham #alabama
For many years, I’ve believed that I could deliv For many years, I’ve believed that I could deliver some message worth sharing through audio or video if I just had the right platform. It’s always been an intuitive feeling, not a specific plan. And now that I have the technology in place to do a wide variety of media, that nasty old inner critic rears its head, asking whether I really have anything worthwhile to say. And as I sit here practicing, I still have no idea who’s right — my long-term intuition or my harsh inner critic.
Just after sunset Friday evening, there was quite Just after sunset Friday evening, there was quite a pastel light show in the sky to the west of me. #nature #naturephotography #sky #colorful #clouds #sunset #birmingham #alabama
This is the Thursday evening sunset that I just wa This is the Thursday evening sunset that I just watched behind a restaurant in Moody. It’s been raining all evening, but it cleared just enough for some colorful light to poke through the clouds. #nature #naturephotography #sky #colorful #clouds #sunset #birmingham #alabama
I just realized that I had some other photos from I just realized that I had some other photos from Wednesday night’s sunset which I could have posted. I ended up posting an iPhone panorama, but this is what a section of that looked like with the Sony A7 IV instead. #nature #naturephotography #sky #colorful #clouds #sunset #birmingham #alabama
Just a minute before the sun slipped beneath the h Just a minute before the sun slipped beneath the horizon, the late-evening light was colorful and magical Thursday. #nature #naturephotography #sky #colorful #clouds #sunset #birmingham #alabama
I didn’t have a lens wide enough to capture this I didn’t have a lens wide enough to capture this with my “real” camera, so this is just an iPhone panorama. It was beautiful to see in person. #nature #naturephotography #sky #colorful #clouds #sunset #birmingham #alabama
I just heard that tonight’s moon is something ca I just heard that tonight’s moon is something called a “supermoon,” so I photographed it to see if I could see anything unusual, but it looked pretty much the same to me. What exactly is different about this one? Does anyone know? #nature #naturephotography #sky #moon #birmingham #alabama
Today was a day when human beings seemed even more Today was a day when human beings seemed even more inexplicable than usual. On days such as this one, I appreciate the beauty and majesty of nature even more than usual. Beauty always makes sense, whether I can put that into words or not. #nature #naturephotography #sky #colorful #clouds #sunset #birmingham #alabama
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For “throwback Thursday, let me introduce you to For “throwback Thursday, let me introduce you to Sam. In 2009, I took in a young feral cat who I named for the early American revolutionary Samuel Adams. He was one of the most confident — downright arrogant, in fact — cats I’ve ever been around. He had an amazing personality and I immediately loved him. He was no more than 8 or 9 months old when he suddenly died for reasons that my vet couldn’t explain. Even though I had him only a short time, he was one of my all-time favorites. #tbt #cats #tabby #feral #birmingham #alabama
I’ve never been as curious about what a cat migh I’ve never been as curious about what a cat might be thinking as I constantly am about Merlin. As I watch him sitting here on the edge of my desk late Wednesday night, I can’t help but conclude he’s a very deep thinker. #cat #cats #catstagram #catsofinstagram #cute #cutecat #pets #petstagram #petsofinstagram #merlin2024 #instacat #ilovecats #birmingham #alabama
Lucy has been happily rolling around in the freshl Lucy has been happily rolling around in the freshly cut grass of the back yard Wednesday evening. #dog #dogs #dogstagram #dogsofinstagram #cute #cutedog #pets #petstagram #petsofinstagram #instadog #ilovedogs #birmingham #alabama
Thomas believes that he is the Most Interesting Ca Thomas believes that he is the Most Interesting Cat in the World — and I can’t say he’s wrong tonight. #cat #cats #catstagram #catsofinstagram #cute #cutecat #pets #petstagram #petsofinstagram #tabby #tabbycat #instacat #ilovecats #birmingham #alabama
Merlin is ready for me to turn the last of the off Merlin is ready for me to turn the last of the office lights off so he and Thomas can sleep peacefully without me muttering to myself as I write. #cat #cats #catstagram #catsofinstagram #cute #cutecat #pets #petstagram #petsofinstagram #merlin2024 #instacat #ilovecats #birmingham #alabama
Lucy just finished a Neighborhood Watch patrol and Lucy just finished a Neighborhood Watch patrol and now she’s cooling off in the back yard before heading inside for dinner. Her work is never done. #dog #dogs #dogstagram #dogsofinstagram #cute #cutedog #pets #petstagram #petsofinstagram #instadog #ilovedogs #birmingham #alabama
Except when he’s asleep, Thomas always looks as Except when he’s asleep, Thomas always looks as though he’s on high alert and ready to run away from danger. His feral early years still dominate his internal programming. #cat #cats #catstagram #catsofinstagram #cute #cutecat #pets #petstagram #petsofinstagram #tabby #tabbycat #instacat #ilovecats #birmingham #alabama
Lucy just finished her last walk of the day, but s Lucy just finished her last walk of the day, but she still wants more attention. She’s sitting in front of me looking expectantly. She seems certain that we will go outside for one more adventure if she’s persistent enough. #dog #dogs #dogstagram #dogsofinstagram #cute #cutedog #pets #petstagram #petsofinstagram #instadog #ilovedogs #birmingham #alabama
My favorite photos of Merlin tend to be those — My favorite photos of Merlin tend to be those — such as this one — in which he seems to be contemplating difficult issues. Feline philosophy or quantum physics or something else that he figures I wouldn’t understand. #cat #cats #catstagram #catsofinstagram #cute #cutecat #pets #petstagram #petsofinstagram #merlin2024 #instacat #ilovecats #birmingham #alabama #caturday
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On a live awards show Sunday night, one man made a joke about a female celebrity. The husband of the celebrity was offended and hit the man who made the joke. Or maybe it was staged for entertainment. Who knows? Who cares? Social media is full of discussion — and even arguments — about this idiocy today. This baffles me. Let’s assume for a moment that the event happened as reported. People have been having such idiotic fights ever since there have been humans. Half the bars in the world see such brief dustups regularly. It simply doesn’t matter. The fact that so many people believe they need to talk about this — or even need to have opinions about it — is more evidence of the bizarre media brainwashing that convinces many to care passionately about brain-dead trivia. Your life will be happier and saner if you focus on yourself, your family and your friends, not on whatever scripted (or spontaneous) bilge that the media wants to pipe into your home.

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