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David McElroy

making sense of a dysfunctional culture

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Goodbye, Molly (2008-2021)

By David McElroy · July 9, 2021

My little Molly has fallen asleep for the very last time.

On a cold October night in 2008, I started a “rescue mission” for two feral kittens. I had seen them around my house with an adult cat who I believed to be their mother. Then the mother cat disappeared. The two kittens huddled on my porch. And then it got cold one night.

I never intended to keep the two kittens, but those two turned into a total of six from their little family who came into my life. The kittens — who I eventually named Molly and Bessie — were too feral to be adopted by people who wanted sweet and loving cats. So I had no choice but to keep them. Over the past 13 years, I’ve struggled to save them and make their lives safe and comfortable.

That long rescue mission finally came to an end today. And even though I worked hard to give them all they needed, I somehow feel as though I failed them.

I don’t know why I feel that way. If I hadn’t taken them in, they would have had short and unhappy lives. The home I gave them was the best they could have possibly had. I just wanted them to be safe and happy.

I wanted them to learn to trust and love and relax. It was hard for them.

I’ve told the story before about how Molly was returned to me by the family who tried to adopt her. When she came back from that failed adoption, she was pregnant. You can read here about how I brought them inside and about her four kittens.

One of Molly’s kittens died after a few weeks. The remaining three girls were named after the English Brontë sisters — the writers Charlotte, Emily and Anne. It’s been a heartbreak for me to lose each one of them at an early age. There seemed to be something in their genes that caused them to die early.

I was very close to Emily. She was the only one of the family who really wanted love and attention from me. She slept on top of me each night of her life. I lost her when she was only 6 years old.

Charlotte was the leader of the three sisters. She lived until she was 7 years old. She suddenly had the same issues which killed Emily — and the vet could never say for sure what the problem was.

Solid black Anne lived until she was 10 years old. She was a victim of the same sort of issue that had already taken her sisters.

Molly’s sister, Bessie, died three years ago, when the pair were 10 years old. So Molly was the only one left. The matriarch of the group was going to last the longest.

About the first of this year, I thought Molly was going downhill — in ways that matched what all the rest of them had gone through. But she recovered from whatever was making her seem slow and lethargic. I had high hopes that she’d stay with me a few more years.

About a week ago, she started getting weak again. She had always been tiny — between 4.5 and 5 pounds — but she was even thinner. She was weak. She was eating well, but her body seemed to have stopped absorbing the nutrients.

It was exactly like what all the rest of this little family had gone through. I knew she was dying, but I didn’t want to talk to anybody about it, because it hurt too much. When I came home from work Friday evening, her little body was cold.

For most of her life, Molly had been unwilling to let me get close to her. She ran whenever a human was close. Any interaction with her was difficult and usually left me scratched and bloody. She was still a terrified feral cat who thought she was in danger.

Over the last year, something started changing for Molly. I’m not sure what caused it. Every now and then — when she was in the right mood — she would allow me to touch her.

It felt like a miracle.

Molly slowly learned to enjoy some attention, at least occasionally. For the first time in her life, I heard her purr. There were times when she was almost like a normal, loving cat.

As I think back over her 13 years — and the struggle to save her entire family and give them safety — the times that stand out to me the most now were those times in the last year. They were times when she finally looked at me with her beautiful green eyes — with peace instead of fear — and allowed me to rub her.

And on those times, she would purr long and loud.

I regret that I was never able to solve their medical issues and give all of them the long lives I would have preferred for them. But I did the best I could — and I know they were safe and they were as happy as they could be.

For a feral little girl who lived most of her life in fear, she didn’t really have a lot to give to humans. But she did give me something valuable over this last year.

She finally gave me her trust.

I saved her the best way I knew how. I hope it was enough for her. I hope she was happy.

Note: You can see plenty of other photos of Molly on their Instagram page. Below is my favorite photo of Molly and Bessie together. Molly is on the left.

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This was the Monday evening sunset. While I was wa This was the Monday evening sunset. While I was waiting for the right color and light, a swarm of gnats descended on my car. It was like the Hitchcock film “The Birds,” except they were gnats. So I got out of there before things could get ugly. 😺 #nature #naturephotography #sky #colorful #clouds #sunset #birmingham #alabama
I normally get home by the quickest path that will I normally get home by the quickest path that will take me there, but I wasn’t in the mood today to deal with lots of other drivers. So I skipped I-459 and went across the slower two-lane route of Alabama 119. The drive didn’t cure me of all that ails me, but it was a more pleasant and humane experience, at least for me. #nature #naturephotography #trees #countryroad #birmingham #alabama
The skies are a chaotic mix of blue and dark gray The skies are a chaotic mix of blue and dark gray in Birmingham this afternoon. It was mostly blue earlier, but at times it’s turned almost dark as night — before going back to this mixture of heavy clouds and clear skies. It’s beautiful, but it’s hard to guess what’s about to happen. (The National Weather Service issued a thunderstorm warning, so that’s what those folks think is going to happen.) #nature #naturephotography #sky #clouds #birmingham #alabama
This was the sunset behind the restaurant where I This was the sunset behind the restaurant where I hung out to work for awhile this evening. #nature #naturephotography #sky #colorful #clouds #sunset #birmingham #alabama
There was just an orange glow for sunset tonight. There was just an orange glow for sunset tonight. Nothing fancy. #nature #naturephotography #sky #colorful #clouds #sunset #birmingham #alabama
This is what the sky looked like just after sunset This is what the sky looked like just after sunset earlier this evening. I couldn’t decide whether to show you the wider view or the closer view, so you got both. #nature #naturephotography #sky #colorful #clouds #sunset #birmingham #alabama
I caught the last little bit of light Saturday eve I caught the last little bit of light Saturday even just after the sun had gone beneath the horizon. When you watch something such as this, it’s easy to understand why early humans assumed that the sun revolved around us instead of the other way around. #nature #naturephotography #sky #colorful #clouds #sunset #birmingham #alabama
I missed most of the sunset Friday evening, but I I missed most of the sunset Friday evening, but I came along just in time to see this color before the light was completely gone. #nature #naturephotography #sky #colorful #clouds #sunset #birmingham #alabama
As I was almost home — from a very long work day As I was almost home — from a very long work day — I saw this gorgeous sunset over Cedar Grove Baptist Church in Leeds, just a mile or so from my house. #nature #naturephotography #sky #colorful #clouds #sunset #birmingham #alabama
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For “throwback Thursday, let me introduce you to For “throwback Thursday, let me introduce you to Sam. In 2009, I took in a young feral cat who I named for the early American revolutionary Samuel Adams. He was one of the most confident — downright arrogant, in fact — cats I’ve ever been around. He had an amazing personality and I immediately loved him. He was no more than 8 or 9 months old when he suddenly died for reasons that my vet couldn’t explain. Even though I had him only a short time, he was one of my all-time favorites. #tbt #cats #tabby #feral #birmingham #alabama
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Lucy has been happily rolling around in the freshl Lucy has been happily rolling around in the freshly cut grass of the back yard Wednesday evening. #dog #dogs #dogstagram #dogsofinstagram #cute #cutedog #pets #petstagram #petsofinstagram #instadog #ilovedogs #birmingham #alabama
Thomas believes that he is the Most Interesting Ca Thomas believes that he is the Most Interesting Cat in the World — and I can’t say he’s wrong tonight. #cat #cats #catstagram #catsofinstagram #cute #cutecat #pets #petstagram #petsofinstagram #tabby #tabbycat #instacat #ilovecats #birmingham #alabama
Merlin is ready for me to turn the last of the off Merlin is ready for me to turn the last of the office lights off so he and Thomas can sleep peacefully without me muttering to myself as I write. #cat #cats #catstagram #catsofinstagram #cute #cutecat #pets #petstagram #petsofinstagram #merlin2024 #instacat #ilovecats #birmingham #alabama
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Except when he’s asleep, Thomas always looks as Except when he’s asleep, Thomas always looks as though he’s on high alert and ready to run away from danger. His feral early years still dominate his internal programming. #cat #cats #catstagram #catsofinstagram #cute #cutecat #pets #petstagram #petsofinstagram #tabby #tabbycat #instacat #ilovecats #birmingham #alabama
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My favorite photos of Merlin tend to be those — My favorite photos of Merlin tend to be those — such as this one — in which he seems to be contemplating difficult issues. Feline philosophy or quantum physics or something else that he figures I wouldn’t understand. #cat #cats #catstagram #catsofinstagram #cute #cutecat #pets #petstagram #petsofinstagram #merlin2024 #instacat #ilovecats #birmingham #alabama #caturday
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On a live awards show Sunday night, one man made a joke about a female celebrity. The husband of the celebrity was offended and hit the man who made the joke. Or maybe it was staged for entertainment. Who knows? Who cares? Social media is full of discussion — and even arguments — about this idiocy today. This baffles me. Let’s assume for a moment that the event happened as reported. People have been having such idiotic fights ever since there have been humans. Half the bars in the world see such brief dustups regularly. It simply doesn’t matter. The fact that so many people believe they need to talk about this — or even need to have opinions about it — is more evidence of the bizarre media brainwashing that convinces many to care passionately about brain-dead trivia. Your life will be happier and saner if you focus on yourself, your family and your friends, not on whatever scripted (or spontaneous) bilge that the media wants to pipe into your home.

I’m in the middle of migrating this website to new servers this week. This means you might encounter some unexpected behavior until I get all the bugs worked out. Clicking on my links (including this one) might cause your browser to give you the message that it’s a site without a current security certificate. It’s not actually unsafe, but there’s something which isn’t yet set up for the security certificate. I apologize for any such errors you might encounter while the process is going on. If you notice any problems with content which didn’t migrate properly, I would appreciate you letting me know the details at davidmcelroy@mac.com. Thanks for your patience.

I often wonder what animals think when they look at us and consider the society we’ve created. Yes, I know this is fanciful and unrealistic, but what if they could? Would they be astounded at how we treat each other? Would they be disgusted by the ugliness and pettiness which fill so many of our daily interactions? The truth is that I’m feeling pretty disgusted with humanity tonight. I made the mistake of reading some online interactions that I should have avoided — and it sickened me. The people involved appeared to be vile and stupid and arrogant. I wish I could pretend they’re a tiny minority, but I know better. It’s times such as this when I most need to escape much of “civilization” and disconnect from their world. If humans are going to be worthy of “ruling this planet,” we have a lot of growth to do. And I fear that growth is nowhere in sight. So my buddy Thomas, above, and all of his friends would be right to judge us harshly — and to think, “Why do you folks get to be in charge?”

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Have you ever had what you thought was a new idea — and then discovered that “old you” had the same idea years ago? I had that experience tonight. And it’s been wonderful. I came up with an idea tonight for a very short satirical film that would be a promotion for a fictitious college. The point is to make the college promote — as good things — everything which is actually terrible about most modern colleges. Then I remembered a fake college that I invented back when I was in college. I had created student recruitment brochures and various newsletters back then, so I decided to call my “new” college by the same name I’d invented years ago: Ochita College. As I searched my computer for any old material I might still have about Ochita from the past, I discovered an email I sent to someone in 2009 — outlining essentially the same idea which I came up with tonight. Since I didn’t remember writing that, it felt like magic. So my next film project just might be this one instead. If all goes well, you might soon see “Ochita College: Your Future Starts Here.” This should be fun.

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