{"id":14470,"date":"2012-06-09T00:00:37","date_gmt":"2012-06-09T05:00:37","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.davidmcelroy.org\/?p=14470"},"modified":"2012-06-08T22:46:56","modified_gmt":"2012-06-09T03:46:56","slug":"english-teacher-tells-wellesley-grads-youre-nothing-special-not-yet","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/davidmcelroy.org\/?p=14470","title":{"rendered":"English teacher tells Wellesley grads: ‘You’re nothing special’ \u2014 not yet"},"content":{"rendered":"

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Everybody gets a trophy these days, because everybody is special. Except, well, most people aren’t special. Not yet. Not until they’ve done something exceptional.<\/p>\n

At one of the nation’s best high schools, a teacher stood at graduation last Friday and told his departing seniors something that shouldn’t be remarkable. (See the video of the speech below and the full text underneath that.) What English teacher David McCullough said should be obvious, but in a world where children grow up being told they’re special just for being themselves — without having to earn recognition by doing something with their potential — it’s a radical step to tell the truth.<\/p>\n

“You are not special,” McCullough said. “You are not exceptional.\u00a0Contrary to what your u9 soccer trophy suggests, your glowing seventh grade report card, despite every assurance of a certain corpulent purple dinosaur, that nice Mister Rogers and your batty Aunt Sylvia, no matter how often your maternal caped crusader has swooped in to save you, you\u2019re nothing special.”<\/p>\n

The graduates of Wellesley High School<\/a> are accustomed to seeing themselves as special. According to figures from the school, 92 percent of graduates go to four-year colleges and the remainder go to community college or some other post-secondary training. A far disproportionate share of Wellesley grads go to the country’s prestigious universities. But McCullough told me they can’t see themselves as exceptional yet — because they haven’t achieved anything.<\/p>\n

\"\"<\/a>“The fulfilling life, the distinctive life, the relevant life, is an achievement<\/em>, not something that will fall into your lap because you\u2019re a nice person or mommy ordered it from the caterer,” he said. “You\u2019ll note the Founding Fathers took pains to secure your inalienable right to life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness — quite an active verb, “pursuit” –which leaves, I should think, little time for lying around watching parrots rollerskate on YouTube.”<\/p>\n

He urged the graduates to do things they love and believe to be important.<\/p>\n

“…I urge you to do whatever you do for no reason other than you love it and believe in its importance,” McCullough said. “Don\u2019t bother with work you don\u2019t believe in any more than you would a spouse you\u2019re not crazy about….”<\/p>\n

McCullough made it clear that he wants the graduates to be special. It’s not that they’re not capable of it. It’s simply that they haven’t done<\/em> anything yet — and he seems to be afraid no one has told them this.<\/p>\n

Human beings need to believe they’re special. But self-esteem that comes from empty praise based on absolutely nothing is shallow and brittle. It will turn people into narcissists and they’ll spend their entire lives begging to be praised. But real self-esteem — the healthy kind — comes from achieving things. It comes from knowing you’ve taken your potential and done something worthwhile with it.<\/p>\n

That kind of self-esteem brings healthy confidence and an ability to cope with the world. It’s a lesson that kids need to be learning all their lives — but telling them at high school graduation is better than never.<\/p>\n