{"id":40744,"date":"2026-09-28T20:09:44","date_gmt":"2026-09-29T01:09:44","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/davidmcelroy.org\/?p=40744"},"modified":"2026-09-28T20:09:44","modified_gmt":"2026-09-29T01:09:44","slug":"i-should-have-said-this-long-ago-im-lucky-to-have-you-in-my-life","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/davidmcelroy.org\/?p=40744","title":{"rendered":"I should have said this long ago: \u2018I\u2019m lucky to have you in my life\u2019"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"\"<\/a><\/p>\n

For the last couple of days, I\u2019ve had an intense desire to return to a restaurant where I haven\u2019t eaten in years.<\/p>\n

Cosmo\u2019s Pizza was one of my two favorite pizza places in Birmingham for many years. (Salvatore\u2019s is the other.) A political client first took me there in the early 1990s and it quickly became a place that I would visit over and over \u2014 with many different people.<\/p>\n

It was in the heart of Birmingham\u2019s artsy Five Points South area. It was eclectic. The crowd could be strange. There was energy and weirdness in the air. I loved it.<\/p>\n

Cosmo\u2019s closed permanently in 2016, so it\u2019s been a decade. But over the weekend, I found myself intensely craving the experience of being there.<\/p>\n

I was craving the pizza, but I was craving the atmosphere even more. And after thinking about it for a couple of days, I\u2019ve realized I was craving something else. I was craving some of the experiences I\u2019ve had there \u2014 and it finally hit me that I was craving something about the people I\u2019ve taken there, too.<\/p>\n

This felt like more than simple nostalgia, though. I had the odd feeling that something in me felt like returning to the past to finish some unfinished emotional business. Every woman I dated for years went to Cosmo\u2019s at least once \u2014 and some went there many times with me.<\/p>\n

As I tried to get to sleep in the wee hours of Sunday night, I puzzled over what I was feeling. And it suddenly hit me that there was something I needed to say \u2014 to women I\u2019ll never even talk with again.<\/p>\n

I have dated some amazing women. Most of them have visited Cosmo’s with me at one point or another. Maybe that’s why my mind selected that location as the setting for a lesson it was trying to teach me.<\/p>\n

I finally realized through sleepy eyes that what I was experiencing wasn’t just nostalgia for a place I couldn’t visit. It wasn’t even just nostalgia for women I remember fondly.<\/p>\n

I’ve been thinking that there’s something I should have said to every one of them, because it was true for each in her own way.<\/p>\n

“I’m incredibly lucky to have you in my life,”<\/em> is what I’d like to go back and say to each of them.<\/p>\n

I was engaged to marry two of those women. I spent many happy nights and afternoons there with each of them. There were another dozen who I spent many enjoyable hours with there, too.<\/p>\n

I’m not going to be maudlin enough to explain the virtues and personalities of each of the women. Each had different gifts \u2014 intelligence, beauty, warmth, talent, humor and personality in different measures.<\/p>\n

But I don’t remember ever once making it specifically clear to each of them what I appreciated about her company and her affection.<\/p>\n

I went through a long period back then when I was trying to decide who I should marry. I was fortunate enough to have the love and presence of some amazing women during that period. And now that I’m thinking of that period \u2014 and all the mistakes I made along the way \u2014 I find that one of the unspoken mistakes I made was a lack of gratitude.<\/p>\n

If I could go back, I would tell each of these women what I appreciated about her, whether it was a long-term relationship or just a short-term thing that never led to anything serious.<\/p>\n

And for a few in particular, I would make sure each realized exactly why I chose to spend time with her \u2014 intelligence, warmth, empathy, love, personality and a dozen other things.<\/p>\n

It would be odd to contact old girlfriends out of the blue to say such things, of course, so I’m not ridiculous enough to consider actually doing it. Most of them are married now. Maybe all of them are. What I might say wouldn’t fit into the context of their lives.<\/p>\n

I’ve just suddenly realized that I have a lot of gratitude for these amazing and loving women. I now wish I had had the wisdom to show them how much I appreciated them at the time.<\/p>\n

So if you happen to be one of those women from long ago \u2014 whether you were ever one of my Cosmo’s companions or not \u2014 please know that I appreciated something about you. Every one of you.<\/p>\n

I remain grateful for what each of you brought to my life. Every one of you is special in your own way. So thank you for spending time with me. I appreciate you.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

For the last couple of days, I\u2019ve had an intense desire to return to a restaurant where I haven\u2019t eaten in years. Cosmo\u2019s Pizza was one of my two favorite pizza places in Birmingham for many years. (Salvatore\u2019s is the other.) A political client first took me there in the early 1990s and it quickly Keep Reading<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_genesis_hide_title":false,"_genesis_hide_breadcrumbs":false,"_genesis_hide_singular_image":false,"_genesis_hide_footer_widgets":false,"_genesis_custom_body_class":"","_genesis_custom_post_class":"","_genesis_layout":"","_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_feature_clip_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2},"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-40744","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","category-uncategorized","entry"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p1x9iR-aBa","jetpack_featured_media_url":"","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/davidmcelroy.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/40744","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/davidmcelroy.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/davidmcelroy.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/davidmcelroy.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/davidmcelroy.org\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=40744"}],"version-history":[{"count":14,"href":"https:\/\/davidmcelroy.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/40744\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":40761,"href":"https:\/\/davidmcelroy.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/40744\/revisions\/40761"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/davidmcelroy.org\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=40744"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/davidmcelroy.org\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=40744"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/davidmcelroy.org\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=40744"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}