I was checking out at a store Friday when I handed the cashier a box containing individual items that she needed to count in order to charge me for. I told her there were six of them and she rang it up without checking.
“Well, if you’re going to take my word for it without looking, there were really only two,” I jokingly said to her.
“Oh, you wouldn’t lie to me,” she said quite seriously and confidently. “I can tell. Most people would, but you wouldn’t.”
My first reaction was to be grateful that someone could see my sterling character all the way through the fat and ugly exterior. It’s kind of nice to be trusted, isn’t it? And to be honest, this is something I’ve heard strangers say to me all my life. I seem to have a trustworthy-looking face.
But the more I thought about it, the more I realized that her reaction wasn’t really that great. In fact, it’s the sort of poor judgment people use all the time when they turn their lives over to politicians who they’ve decided they can trust.
Have you ever heard someone say — of a politician or actor or someone else they’ve never met — “I really like him”? We all seem to make instant, intuitive judgments about people, and we’re oddly sure that our judgments are correct, even if it’s absurd for other people to make such silly snap judgments.
What are you likely to regret when it’s too late to change?
Timeless design principles beat suburban McMansions for beauty
What if other people see you or hear you differently than you do?
I struggle to reflect warm love instead of the world’s cold fear
Intelligent, well-meaning people often pull in opposite directions
Hugs from a sweet little girl can erase stress after long work day
There are more of us than ever, so why do many of us feel so alone?
Honesty, wisdom and insight teach that we have to live with uncertainty
If you’re scared of being ‘bad,’ manipulated praise relieves fear