When I was young, I wanted to be great. I wanted to be important, successful and powerful. I wanted to be put onto a pedestal, where I could get the adulation and approval I craved.
I wouldn’t have put it that way then, of course. I just thought I wanted the things my culture presented as normal goals for someone like me. (I understand now the degree to which being raised by a narcissistic father left me craving approval and attention.)
As I’ve gotten more emotionally healthy and psychologically mature, I’ve been surprised to find out that my desires in life have changed. It’s not that I’ve “given up.” It’s not that I’m settling for something easy after failing to achieve things I wanted.
My desires today are healthier and far more likely to make me happy. You see, I want to be ordinary. I want to be a good man. I want to be kind and loving and content with the joy of living an ordinary human life.
But I’ve recently discovered a fascinating paradox. As an ordinary man, I won’t have the things this world and our culture have always promised me. I won’t have wealth or power or adulation. But it turns out that the people who gain what the world and our culture promise won’t have what I have.
They won’t have the peace and contentment and joy of a man who’s living a simple and ordinary life.

There’s magic in the dark solitude and quiet stillness after midnight
Why exactly is it such a big deal to be invited to the White House?
Tradeoffs about values leave me feeling like ‘double-minded man’
500 years after Luther’s 95 theses, there’s still not much to celebrate
Be very afraid of men (or women) who question your patriotism
Listening to our own inner voice can be the toughest thing we do
I’ve now launched a new podcast about search for love and family
If you believe in these campaign fairy tales, welcome to Fantasy Island
FRIDAY FUNNIES