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David McElroy

making sense of a dysfunctional culture

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The ‘man in the mirror’ always turns out to be our worst enemy

By David McElroy · April 4, 2025

Whatever goes wrong in our lives, there’s always someone else to blame. Always.

The boss wouldn’t give me a chance. The woman I loved cheated on me. The man I married turned out to be an abuser. He was a terrible father. My friend made me start using drugs and partying all the time. I had to go into debt because all my friends had nice things and I had to keep up with them. I didn’t get the education I needed. I’m fat and nobody likes me.

Our excuses are endless. But even when our justifications for ourselves are completely accurate, there was always someone else who ultimately had control. And even if we got into a terrible situation — or a hundred terrible situations — there’s always someone who can take control to fix things and make our lives better.

It can be a painful shock to accept that the man in the mirror — or the woman in the mirror — almost always has the power to turn a miserable life into a satisfying life.

But it’s easier to blame someone else and ignore the man in the mirror. I’ve done that at times. Maybe you have, too.

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Evil and idiocy stripping away veneer of western civilization

By David McElroy · April 3, 2025

I’m often terrified to remember that the veneer of civilization on top of the savagery of human history is razor thin and comes off easily. That veneer is wearing very thin right now — and evil is forcing its way out into the open.

What’s even more terrifying is that many people are eagerly cheering for one form of evil or another. But they all assume they’re on the side of what’s right — and that the people they hate are the only evil ones.

We like to see political and social struggles as battles between good and evil. We like to choose good guys and bad guys. We like to see ourselves on the side of angels who are fighting against demons, whether real or metaphorical.

But there are times when titanic clashes are between one form of evil and another form of evil. Western civilization is locked in one such battle right now. The United States is ground zero for that clash of evil — which some people try to see as “the lesser of two evils.”

Choosing either side right now ensures that you become part of the evil.

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To save my own sanity, it’s time for me to shut up about Trump

By David McElroy · January 24, 2025

One of my biggest problems in life is constantly falling for the delusion that I can get people with wildly divergent views — people who hate each other — to see things differently. I have the delusional belief that I can help people find common ground by giving both sides a third way of looking at a problem.

Objectively, I know that I’m wrong to believe I can change the way others see things, but I spend too much time trying to play this unintentional “mediator” role.

And it often takes an emotional toll on me. That’s what it’s doing right now.

I’m going to really try to step back from commenting on anything around Donald Trump right now, simply because his supporters and his most dishonest detractors are upsetting me equally. I find that there’s no way to deal with all of the dishonesty coming from both sides about Trump.

I’ve made it very clear — for years — that I think Trump is a lying narcissist who is uniquely dangerous. He is an evil man. Nobody could confuse me for someone who has any support for him, but I’m also infuriated by people who base their attacks against him on irrational and dishonest arguments.

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This is one of the funniest things that ChatGPT ha This is one of the funniest things that ChatGPT has done for me. I asked it to create a movie poster showing what a movie poster would look like for a film starring me. I told it to use my previous writings (from my website) to come up with a title and subject matter. And this is what it came up with. I can’t stop laughing. Also, the software decided on its own to included Oliver. 😺
I just noticed in the past couple of days that the I just noticed in the past couple of days that there’s suddenly far more color in the leaves of the trees, which lets me know that winter isn’t far behind. I took these two photos on a chilly Sunday afternoon nine years ago this week. #nature #naturephotography #colorful #trees #autumn #birmingham #alabama
Some of you might be aware that my dog Lucy died o Some of you might be aware that my dog Lucy died of cancer last weekend. As I’ve been grieving the loss of this beautiful and loving girl, I put together a one-minute compilation of short videos of Lucy from her first two or three weeks with me in early 2016. She was several years old at the time, but living with me provided her first stable home. She was unsure of herself at first, but she quickly developed confidence as she discovered how much she was loved. #dog #dogs #dogstagram #dogsofinstagram #cute #cutedog #pets #petstagram #petsofinstagram #instadog #ilovedogs #birmingham #alabama
Tonight’s moon is apparently something called a be Tonight’s moon is apparently something called a beaver supermoon. I noticed as I was getting home from work that it was a bright yellowish-orange, so I snapped this a couple of miles from home. It’s not a great photo, but I was pretty happy with it for an iPhone shot on the side of the road. #nature #naturephotography #sky #colorful #clouds #sunset #birmingham #alabama #iphone17pro
I’m heartbroken to tell you that I lost Lucy early I’m heartbroken to tell you that I lost Lucy early Sunday morning. The World’s Happiest Dog lived with me for 10 years, but I can’t say for sure how old she was when she came to live with me. I’ve written a brief article on my website about Lucy and what she meant to me, which you’ll find as the most recent article at davidmcelroy.org if you would be interested. (There’s a clickable link on my profile.) Like every good dog, she was “the goodest dog.” I love her dearly and I’m going to miss her fiercely. #dog #dogs #dogstagram #dogsofinstagram #cute #cutedog #pets #petstagram #petsofinstagram #instadog #ilovedogs #birmingham #alabama
There’s been a lot of controversy over Bad Bunny p There’s been a lot of controversy over Bad Bunny performing at the Super Bowl, so I suggest a response. I’ll put together a novelty act called Funny Bunny and the G-Men. Here’s what the costumes look like. (And the animated version doesn’t even need costumes.) Funny Bunny does satirical political songs while the G-Men chase him around. With the right humorous songs, this could be comedy gold. Who wants to write songs? 😃
This was the view on my left this evening as I dro This was the view on my left this evening as I drove home from work. This was on I-459 near the Cahaba River bridge. (I didn’t have my “real” camera in the car, so this is an iPhone photo.) #nature #naturephotography #sky #colorful #clouds #sunset #birmingham #alabama
I have always accepted as obvious the fact that yo I have always accepted as obvious the fact that you couldn’t take a halfway decent photo of the moon with a smartphone. (I don’t count the cheat that Samsung uses in some models to artificially create bits that don’t exist in the optical image.) But a friend shot a picture of the moon with her new iPhone 17 night or two ago, I so snapped one frame as I got out of the car just now. The resolution and detail aren’t great, but this is better than I expected. #nature #naturephotography #sky #moon #birmingham #alabama #iphone17pro
I hope this rainbow over I-459 on my way home is a I hope this rainbow over I-459 on my way home is a good omen for the weekend. 😃
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If you saw Alex’s photo earlier from his new job a If you saw Alex’s photo earlier from his new job as a mall Santa, you might not be surprised to know that Sam has decided to become his helper. This is his elf costume for his helper job. #cat #cats #catstagram #catsofinstagram #cute #cutecat #blackcat #blackcats #pets #petstagram #petsofinstagram #instacat #ilovecats #birmingham #alabama
Alex just started a part-time job as a mall Santa. Alex just started a part-time job as a mall Santa. He wants to pick up some extra money between now and Christmas. The only problem is that he has to pretend to care what other people want, which is really difficult for him. #cat #cats #catstagram #catsofinstagram #cute #cutecat #pets #petstagram #petsofinstagram #tabby #tabbycat #instacat #ilovecats #birmingham #alabama
Just after midnight, Alex is wide awake and curiou Just after midnight, Alex is wide awake and curious about something as he relaxes on the bed. #cat #cats #catstagram #catsofinstagram #cute #cutecat #pets #petstagram #petsofinstagram #tabby #tabbycat #instacat #ilovecats #birmingham #alabama
Sam has gone back to the heated pad in the office, Sam has gone back to the heated pad in the office, but Oliver and Alex are still in the bedroom with me while I read. Alex just awakened, so he looks as though he’s a little out of it. I think Oliver is just wondering when some more turkey and gravy show up. #cat #cats #catstagram #catsofinstagram #cute #cutecat #pets #petstagram #petsofinstagram #instacat #ilovecats #birmingham #alabama
All three of the cats have been on the bed Thursda All three of the cats have been on the bed Thursday evening to sleep off their turkey coma. Oliver is near where I’m sitting and comes over for some lap time every now and then. Alex woke up a minute ago for some unscheduled bath time. I’m not sure Sam has awakened since he fell into his turkey-induced slumber. #cat #cats #catstagram #catsofinstagram #cute #cutecat #pets #petstagram #petsofinstagram #instacat #ilovecats #birmingham #alabama
Here are Oliver and Sam chowing down on turkey and Here are Oliver and Sam chowing down on turkey and gravy for Thanksgiving. They liked the gravy even more than the turkey. Alex had already eaten some and returned for more after this. #cat #cats #catstagram #catsofinstagram #cute #cutecat #pets #petstagram #petsofinstagram #instacat #ilovecats #birmingham #alabama
When I went to the office to turn the lights off f When I went to the office to turn the lights off for the night, Alex was showing clear signs of advanced sleep deprivation, so he was sound asleep about 30 seconds after this yawn. I should be smart enough to emulate his behavior on this point. (The second picture here is from the CritterCam just after I turned the lights off and left the room.) #cat #cats #catstagram #catsofinstagram #cute #cutecat #pets #petstagram #petsofinstagram #tabby #tabbycat #instacat #ilovecats #birmingham #alabama
Sam never asks for attention, unlike Alex and (esp Sam never asks for attention, unlike Alex and (especially) Oliver. I don’t remember him actually approaching me in such a way as to invite being picked up, but he just did that. I’m in the bedroom late Wednesday night and he slowly crept over to the chair where I’m sitting. When I reached down to pick him up, he tensed up and seemed to second-guess his effort, but he stayed. The light is pretty bad here, but it thrilled me for Sam to seek attention. #cat #cats #catstagram #catsofinstagram #cute #cutecat #blackcat #blackcats #pets #petstagram #petsofinstagram #instacat #ilovecats #birmingham #alabama
I just got home and Alex is getting a bit of lap t I just got home and Alex is getting a bit of lap time. Oliver is waiting for a turn next. 😺 #cat #cats #catstagram #catsofinstagram #cute #cutecat #pets #petstagram #petsofinstagram #tabby #tabbycat #instacat #ilovecats #birmingham #alabama
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If you have problems with high blood pressure, I’d like to encourage you to consider making serious changes to your diet. There might be some people who don’t have any choice but to start taking prescription medications for high blood pressure, but I’d like to tell you that I have completely eliminated my issue by eliminating all sugar and almost all carbohydrates. (A couple of months ago, my blood pressure hit 185/144, which was dangerously high — considered stage 3 hypertension.) By completely changing my eating habits, I’m down 22 pounds and my blood pressure is now in the “ideal” range — without taking any medication. In addition, I sleep better and I have more energy. Getting away from the sugar-laden mess that we generally refer to as “highly processed food” has been a life-changer for me. Now my challenge is to avoid slipping back into old habits — by eating in the dangerous ways that almost everyone in our society has come to see as normal.

When I first heard about this, I thought it must be satire. When I discovered it was real, I was appalled, but I still thought it must be a one-time thing from some nutty activist. But it turns out it’s the latest bit of pandering to a bunch of far-left activists who believe that a man can become a woman if he decides to claim he’s a woman. As everybody knows, men have prostate glands. Women do not. Period. End of story. Men can get prostate cancer. Women cannot. But political activists are so eager to pretend that a man claiming to be a “trans woman” is really a woman that they are insisting that “women” be included in public health messages about the issue. This is nothing but political virtue-signaling. If you’re a man, you know which parts you have. You know that you ought to be screened. Nobody is made any safer by dragging far-left gender ideology into simple medical reality.

Every time someone tries to tighten requirements around the use of absentee ballots, I hear screams from Democrats and others on the political left that such efforts are nothing but “suppression of black voters.” These protests have never made sense to me, especially because it’s never been a secret that absentee ballot fraud goes on all the time in certain areas. (Everybody knew it when I worked in politics.) The people who engage in such fraud are rarely caught — often because the local political establishment approves of the crime — but a Democrat who won a primary election in Clay County, Alabama, last year has pleaded guilty to this sort of cheating. Terry Andrew Heflin was running for a place on the Clay County Commission. He was caught ordering seven absentee ballots in the names of various voters and sending them to his post office box — after which he used the ballots to vote absentee for himself seven time. Did he have other people cast additional fraudulent ballots? We’ll never know. But in a primary in which he was able to win with only 141 votes, it wouldn’t take many fraudulent votes to change the election. The next time you hear “civil rights activists” claim that it’s just “voter suppression” to hurt blacks which is at the root of efforts to stop this fraud, remember Terry Heflin. If you care about fair and honest elections, ballot security and voter identity should matter to you.

A state legislator in Maine has been stripped of the ability to speak in the state Legislature — and her votes are not being counted on legislative issues — all because she made a truthful social media post. Rep. Laurel Libby (R-Auburn, Maine) opposes allowing boys to compete against girls’ teams in school athletics and she’s become known for making an issue of it. On Feb. 17, she posted on Facebook about a recent example that she found outrageous. She posted side-by-side photos of a boy named John who competed last year in a state track event and won fifth place against other boys two years ago — and a photo of the same boy (now called Katie) who won first place in the same event this year against girls. Whether you find this outrageous or not, Libby is clearly being honest and truthful about the objective facts of an issue of public importance. But the state Legislature censured her. Democrats decreed that she could not speak in the House and that her votes would not count on legislation — until she apologized for the outrage of telling the truth. She refused and her constituents have been unrepresented in the state House since then. The people who promote this ideology are out of touch with reality and won’t rest until they force the rest of us to join them in this delusion. But even if you agree with “trans” ideology, you should be appalled at this heavy-handed attack on political speech.

The late Steve Jobs was at the center of our culture’s transition from analog to digital. He co-founded Apple Computer. He led the team that revolutionized personal computing with the first Macintosh. As CEO of Apple, he led the development of the iPhone and later the iPad. You would think the children of such a man would be surrounded by technology. But Jobs and his wife Laureen didn’t let their children use iPads. Their home had few screens of any kind. Even though Jobs spent most of his time developing and selling Macs and iPhones and iPads, he was home with his wife and children for dinner when he was in town. The family ate together at a simple wooden table in their kitchen — and there were no digital devices or focus on popular culture. Instead, he’s said to have guided his family toward deep discussions of art, philosophy and education — with no iPads to be found. If the man who guided the development of such products chose a different path for his own children, does that suggest that his digital experience taught him that children need human connection, not screens? And does it suggest the possibility that we might be better off if we made the same choice for our families?

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