• Skip to primary navigation
  • Skip to main content
  • Skip to primary sidebar
  • Skip to secondary sidebar

David McElroy

making sense of a dysfunctional culture

  • About David
  • New here?
  • Reading
  • Video
  • About AI

Tribal instincts cause us to see others as evil, when they’re just different

By David McElroy · September 13, 2013

Us vs. them

It’s interesting to hear what conservatives say when they’re talking just among themselves. Same with progressives, libertarians and other groups. Despite the groups’ very different beliefs, there’s a common thread that I tend to observe.

In all of these groups, they might argue among themselves at times, but you can tell they generally come from the same set of assumptions about the world. I tend to listen to a lot of these sorts of discussions. I rarely participate, because I’m getting to the point that it’s not worth arguing. So I just listen and try to figure out what groups believe and how the social groups interact. It’s sort of like being a political sociologist without getting paid for it.

When I listen to the supporters of pretty much any political viewpoint, I can understand the logic of what they believe — if I simply accept their assumptions about the world. No matter how much I disagree with them, I can almost always understand where they’re coming from.

But the vast majority of these people are disdainful of those in other groups. They clearly don’t have any understanding of what the other groups believe or why. What’s more, they’re not really interested in what the other groups believe or why. They’re mostly interested in making fun of them or putting them down in various ways, many times viciously. Within the groups, there seems to be an air of superiority that is amazingly similar. If you removed the ideological content of what they were saying and just looked at the social content of what they were expressing, you’d be hard pressed to figure out which groups were which.

Political and social groups are like little tribes. Humans are very tribal creatures, and one of the results is that every group tends to see the world in terms of “us against them.” The truth is that there are good people and bad people (and those all in between) among every political and social group. But most people in every group judge their group by the best among themselves — and they judge other groups by the worst among them.

As a result, most people of every group see their group as the obvious “good people.” They see all the other groups as obviously “evil people.” That’s why it’s so easy for people in every group to assume that those of other groups who get power aren’t just wrong, but they’re evil — which leads to bizarro conspiracy theories, among other things.

So why does it have to be this way? It’s this way because we’re all competing to control the same big political pie. We have a system that allows one group to put together a temporary electoral coalition of 50 percent plus one and then take control of some particular office (such as the presidency or a governorship) or one house of Congress or a legislature. The only check on those people completely enforcing their will is that other groups might control a different part of the government.

So we’re stuck with groups who hate each other — each thinking that everyone else is evil — and they’re all competing for the right to set the rules for everyone else.

Is this reasonable?

I think we’d be better off if people of every group tried to understand those they disagree with. More understanding and less arrogance might lead to the conclusion that we’re never all going to agree. It might lead to the conclusion that maybe the pie should be split up instead of letting a successful majority impose its way on everyone.

There’s no reason that conservatives can’t have places where the system works according to the rules they want — and people who agree with them can move there and enjoy (or not enjoy) the system they’ve chosen. The same is true for progressives and libertarians and every other group. If a bunch of people want to get together and build a socialist utopia, why should anyone else care — as long as they buy the land and don’t force anyone else to join them?

Why should anyone care if libertarians want to build their own cities? Or Christians? Or Muslims? Or any other group that can buy land and convince people to join them?

We’re doomed to hate each other and fight one another as long as we’re all competing over who wins the right to control everyone. We need a society where different people can live under their own voluntary rules.

This won’t happen as long as we believe that everyone who disagrees with us is evil and wrong. We need to understand each other — and accept that it’s OK for others to live as they please, just as long as they don’t force us to accept their rules.

Share on Social Networks

Related Posts

  • Will the last journalist to leave newspaper business turn off lights?Will the last journalist to leave newspaper business turn off lights?
  • Apologize while you still can, because you’ll live with regret
  • We live in Reverse World, where black is white and good is evil

Filed Under: Uncategorized

Primary Sidebar

Subscribe

Enter your address to receive notifications by email every time new articles are posted. Then click “Subscribe.”

Contact David

David likes email, but can’t reply to every message. I get a surprisingly large number of requests for relationship advice — seriously — but time doesn’t permit a response to all of them. (Sorry.)

Search

Archives

Donations

If you enjoy this site and want to help, click here. All donations are appreciated, no matter how large or small. (PayPal often doesn’t identify donors, so I might not be able to thank you directly.)




Future Photo Display

As part of my effort to rid my life of social media, I will no longer display links to my two Instagram accounts here. Those accounts will be dormant for the time being and will eventually be deleted. I plan to have a method for displaying photos here instead, but the solutions I’ve tested so far have been disappointing. I’m still working on it.

My Instagram

I need some new portraits of myself, so I tried a I need some new portraits of myself, so I tried a few shots after I got home late Monday night. This one wasn’t great, so I’ll try again later, but I can use it until I have time to shoot another. I was too lazy to light this one properly — and it shows. 😺
Sunset, Leeds, Alabama — August 27, 2026 Sunset, Leeds, Alabama — August 27, 2026
Sunset, Leeds, Alabama — August 19, 2026 Sunset, Leeds, Alabama — August 19, 2026
When I got home at midnight Monday, I was doing so When I got home at midnight Monday, I was doing some work in the studio and Oliver wanted to join me, so I showed him around to acclimate him to the place again. He rarely goes in there, but I have pictures of him in that studio on the night I brought him home as a kitten. 😺
Earlier this week, I found two photos of Lucy and Earlier this week, I found two photos of Lucy and me that I had never seen. I loved finding the pictures, but seeing these photos left me thinking about the effect it has on us when we lose an animal we love — and it was also a reminder of how much my life has changed for the last nine months it’s been since I lost her. I wrote an essay about this. You can find it as the most recent post at davidmcelroy.org right now if you’re interested. I really do miss this sweet girl.
When I take lightning pictures, I’m always hoping When I take lightning pictures, I’m always hoping to get just one usable photo, but I got two dramatic images tonight. You might recognize the water tower and communication tower that you’ve seen in many of my sunset photos. This is about a mile from my house in Leeds, which is just east of Birmingham.
For those who are in places where it’s miserably h For those who are in places where it’s miserably hot today, here is a minute of light rain and gentle thunder from my back yard late Saturday afternoon. It’s very relaxing to stand at my back door and watch this, especially since the heat is pretty mild today — 80 degrees (about 26 celsius) — for July in the American South.
Alex was willing to cooperate with me for a new po Alex was willing to cooperate with me for a new portrait late Wednesday night. It’s been roughly three and a half years now since the cold night when I was able to lure him out from behind a garbage dumpster into a trap — but I don’t think he’s sorry at this point that he fell for the trick. 😺
This is the face of a man who’s thrilled that the This is the face of a man who’s thrilled that the weekend is finally here. It was a very long (and productive) week, but the time has finally come that I have time to write and read and think. Late Friday night, I’m at the McDonald’s near my house with a Diet Dr Pepper and a MacBook. For me, it’s like Cheers without the booze.
Follow on Instagram

Critter Instagram

Late Monday night, Alex and Meg are having a quiet Late Monday night, Alex and Meg are having a quiet face-off on the bed. Neither is quite sure what to think of the other, even though Meg has been here for almost a month. They’re now all eating and sleeping in the same room, though, so she’s become part of the group.
From the CritterCam: I’m at the other office, so I From the CritterCam: I’m at the other office, so I don’t know what has Alex’s attention, but I wouldn’t be surprised if he’s already waking up at 5 p.m. to start the long vigil for dinner.
Early Monday afternoon, Meg is watching activity f Early Monday afternoon, Meg is watching activity from his new brothers from the safety of a cave of the castle.
A few minutes before midnight, Meg is on her back A few minutes before midnight, Meg is on her back purring in my lap. She’s a happy girl. You can tell that the dirt and grime from her years outside still haven’t completely faded on the white fur of her back legs.
Meg is hanging out in the bedroom with me just aft Meg is hanging out in the bedroom with me just after midnight Saturday night.
I’ve been waiting football Saturday evening instea I’ve been waiting football Saturday evening instead of feeding cats — and Alex is very certain that I have my priorities very confused. He’s not happy with this. He’s sitting on a pile of dirty clothes watching me giving attention to a game instead of him.
From the CritterCam: I have no idea what has captu From the CritterCam: I have no idea what has captured Oliver’s attention outside an office window Saturday evening just before sunset, but I just checked on him remotely and found him with this very intense expression on his face.
Meg posed for a simple portrait in the bedroom for Meg posed for a simple portrait in the bedroom for me late Friday night. She’s a very photogenic girl.
I was taking a photo of Sam in an office window wh I was taking a photo of Sam in an office window when Oliver decided he should have some attention, too. Sam knows that his bigger brother is upstaging him, but he’s not sure whether to stay in the window or jump down.
Follow on Instagram

Secondary Sidebar

Briefly

The company that owns Facebook and Instagram is heavily promoting its new AI-based software assistant called Muse, but people who are using it as it was designed are incredibly foolish. An early adopter of the software discovered that a few days ago when he advertised an item for sale on Facebook Marketplace — and he inadvertently gave Muse full authority to act on his behalf. The software agreed to a lowball offer made by another Facebook user and then gave that man the home address of the man for whom he was an agent. The software told the buyer that the seller was home and waiting for him. When the buyer showed up and waited angrily, the would-be buyer left an angry review for the man. And this angry man had the seller’s home address. It was only well after that that the software reported what it had done and admitted it had made a mistake. I won’t be putting that much power into the hands of any software. I think anyone who agrees to such terms is a fool. And the software’s user agreement says you’re responsible for purchases the software makes in your name. Nope.

Meet my new girlfriend. Her name is Meg. And she’s my little sweetheart. A couple of months ago, a neighbor across the street told me about a new stray in the neighborhood that she and I were both soon feeding. The cat had been very skittish about contact and she had a lot of scabs and parasites in her fur, but a trip to the vet last week revealed that she was otherwise in good health. The vet estimates her to be 1 to 2 years old. I named her for Meg Murry, the 13-year-old protagonist of Madeleine L’Engle’s wonderful book, “A Wrinkle in Time.” (Please read the book. Don’t watch the horrible movie.) Since we lost Lucy almost a year ago, it seems appropriate that we finally have a new little girl to join the household. She’s already captured my heart, but Alex, Oliver and Sam aren’t there quite yet.

There’s nothing socially acceptable that’s as dangerous as drinking alcohol. Most people grow up being told to “drink responsibly” — and all of us see people abusing this drug in one way or another — but the truth is that drinking alcohol is always a terrible risk. The alcohol in these drinks is toxic and the human liver has to work hard to filter the toxins out. What most people don’t realize is that alcohol is classified as a known carcinogen by the World Health Organization — because of the well-established connection between imbibing and various cancers. Many people have taken refuge behind the idea that light or moderate drinking might be safe, but a new study shows that drinking even one drink a day increases the risks of 10 types of cancer. When I was a teen-ager, I looked around and saw the negative effects that this behavior had on a lot of people and decided not to start drinking, so I’ve never even tried this poison. The evidence keeps piling up that I was lucky to have come to that conclusion early.

It turns out that the radical far left has been training “Antifa cats” to sabotage anything important to Donald Trump. Everything he did was perfect. Honest. It was all the cats’ fault. Arrest all the cats! This is the latest of my ridiculous satirical shorts. Please go watch it. Then “like” it and subscribe. Please. I’m begging you. (Too much?) Although a couple of the previous videos have had views in the hundreds, most have still been seen by fewer than 20 people. So I seem to be having trouble letting people know that page exists.

Here’s the latest of my ridiculous parody shorts. It crossed my mind Tuesday to wonder what a slick and fast-talking car dealer might do right now to try to turn the high price of gasoline to his advantage. So I conceived of a fat and lovable character who tried to sell cars that don’t use any fuel — and then I started wondering if it would be funnier if all the characters were felines. Designing the King Cashpaw character took about four hours, but the rest took only another four hours, so this was a relatively quick piece that virtually wrote itself. I know it’s almost impossible for these parody videos to find a larger audience, but at least they amuse me — and there are 19 of them on my YouTube page now. The first few were very limited, but they’re getting more complex.

Read More

Crass Capitalism

Before you buy anything from Amazon, please click on this link. I’ll get a tiny commission, but it won’t cost you a nickel extra. The cats will thank you. And so will I.

© 2011–2026 · All Rights Reserved
Built by: 1955 DESIGN