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David McElroy

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I wasn’t ready for another dog yet, but Lucy needed a ‘forever home’

By David McElroy · January 25, 2017

When a former neighbor asked me last year whether I was willing to adopt a dog who needed a home, I said no — and I was emphatic about it.

I already had more cats than I wanted to admit, so there was no room at the inn. I love dogs — and missed having them around, too — but I was determined not to have another dog as long as I was living alone. Dogs require a lot of work and since I no longer work from home, it didn’t seem fair to have a dog waiting all day for me to return.

I had absolutely no intention of adopting a dog yet. And that was final.

But one year later, my best canine friend is celebrating her first full year with me today. How did that happen?

Although I had no intention of adopting a dog last year, I agreed to take pictures of this needy dog and help spread the word on social media in an effort to find a home for her. My former neighbor told me it would be difficult to find the right home for her, because she was a “special-needs dog.” She had been rescued from life on a chain as a puppy and even after a couple of years, she was still skittish and terrified of the world. In the photo below, you can see the fear and submission in her eyes. It was the best picture I could get.

Her name was Lucy. She was living with a couple in a small apartment with four other dogs and several cats. The couple were having to move to a smaller place in order to take care of an aging parent. They were keeping three of the dogs, but they didn’t choose Lucy as one of the three. They had to move in another couple of days — so Lucy had to go, just like old furniture that couldn’t be taken along.

When I posted pictures of Lucy on social media, I wrote, “I’m trying to help find a home for this special-needs dog named Lucy. A friend had told me about her a few days ago and I got to meet her this afternoon. It’s going to be very difficult to find the right home for her, because she came from an abusive situation when she was a puppy and she’s still a very skittish dog two years later… If I were still working from home, I would adopt this dog in a heartbeat. Lucy was afraid of the camera, but was otherwise happy to meet me, which her current guardian said wasn’t typical. This couple have to move Saturday, so we have to work quickly to find the right place. Unfortunately, it’s going to take a special situation for her. She needs love, patience and understanding.”

Nobody expressed any serious interest in adopting Lucy. A lot of people felt sorry for her and wanted to help, but nobody stepped forward to take her.

I couldn’t stop thinking about Lucy for the next couple of days. Her eyes in particular were haunting to me. She seemed scared and there was so much need. So I made the fateful decision to provide a foster home for her — just until we found a good home for her.

I told myself and everybody else that it would just be temporary, but in my heart, I knew better. I knew this little girl would never leave my home.

On Jan. 25, 2016, I went to pick her up that evening after work. Lucy was terrified. All she knew was the small apartment and the couple who had cared for her since she had been rescued from the chain two years before. She clearly didn’t know what was happening. She was so scared that she defecated in the back seat of my car during the short ride home.

In the days and weeks that followed, everything about Lucy changed. Slowly, she lost the fear. She was no longer skittish. The hollow look in her eyes slowly went away.

Over time, she became confident. Her tail — which had been down in a submissive posture all the time when I met her — was now proudly curled up.

Lucy seemed happy.

She obviously felt loved. I’ve come to jokingly dub her the World’s Happiest Dog®, because she always seems excited and happy about her life now. It’s hard to believe she’s the same dog.

Lucy happily co-exists with the cats in the house, but her real joy during warmer weather is spending time with me in our fenced back yard.

She runs in the yard and chases squirrels and birds. She seems convinced she’s going to catch one of those squirrels one day.

Lucy loves riding in the car. She puts her back legs on the rear seat and her front paws on the center console next to me — and she rides around town as I do errands.

She always wants the sunroof open, even when it’s cold. If you see her riding down the road, there’s a good chance you’ll see her little black snout sticking out that sunroof — with her sniffer going full blast as she tries to take in all the scents of the world around her.

I didn’t want to adopt another dog — not yet — but Lucy adopted me. She didn’t leave me much choice in the matter. And it turns out that she was right.

I wish I were still working from home so I could spend more time with her. I feel guilty when I come home at the end of a working day and I know how long she’s been without me, but I know how much better off she is than what she was living with a year ago — or what her prospects were after having been labeled a “special needs” dog who would require a lot of work.

Lucy did have special needs. That’s true.

She needed love and consistent attention. She needed to feel secure about her environment. She needed a “forever home” she could count on.

In her heart, I’m sure Lucy knew she needed all those things. I just didn’t know a year ago today how much I needed her.

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Tyler Barnes will never be a basketball star. He probably peaked as a star high school player in Louisville, Ky. But for the last four years, he’s been a walk-on player for the University of Alabama. He’s a chemical engineering major with lots of academic honors who rides the bench because he loves being part of a team. He sometimes gets into games with a minute or two to go, but only if Alabama has a big lead. This Saturday, it was senior day for Alabama basketball, so it was his last chance to play in Coleman Coliseum. Alabama Coach Nate Oats says that one of the team starter’s came to him an hour before the game started — and fellow senior Alex Reese asked Oats if Barnes could start in his place for this one game. Even though the game was huge for Alabama, which is ranked No. 6 in the country and trying to wrap up an SEC title, Oats agreed. Barnes started and played the first three minutes, grabbing what was only the fourth rebound of his career and missing his only shot. Barnes has a great future as an engineer, but you’ll never again hear from him as a basketball player. For three shining minutes Saturday, though, he was a starter for a top-10 college basketball team — and his parents were in the stands from Kentucky to see it. There’s a lot of ugliness in college basketball right now, but this story makes me happy.

It was five years ago tonight when Lucy first rode in the car with me. She was on her way to her “forever home” with me that night, but she didn’t know it, so she was terrified. It was a much happier and braver girl who took a ride in the car tonight so we could go through a drive-through window and order a hamburger for her — to celebrate five years with me. She had a great time. If she could remember five years ago tonight, she would be proud of how far she’s come, too. If you’d like to know more about Lucy’s journey from scared dog to brave queen of the household, here’s something I wrote after her first year with me. I’m hoping this girl will have many more happy years with me.

I’ve never been attracted to skinny women. There’s nothing wrong with someone who’s naturally thin, but it’s never been my preference. What has shocked me, though, is the judgment I’ve heard from women all through my life — about themselves and others — about who’s “fat.” I concluded long ago that most women in our culture have been brainwashed to believe that skinny is attractive — and that anything other than skinny is ugly. I first assumed that I was the oddball — for preferring women with bigger and heavier bodies — but I’m coming to the conclusion that most men naturally feel this way to one extent or another. I just ran across new research by a couple of Northwestern University psychology professors that shows that women seriously overestimate how much a straight man will be attracted to a skinny woman. In a perfect world, we would all be at a healthy weight, but when it comes to attractiveness, too heavy is more attractive than skinny. At least to me — and to a lot of men, too.

Years ago, I heard a question that seemed very insightful at the time. You’ve probably heard it, too. What would you do if you knew you couldn’t fail? The question is intended to help you uncover things you really want to do, but which you’re afraid to try — for fear of failure. In an interview today, I heard the great marketing guru Seth Godin give a different point of view. He said the better question is to ask what you would do even if you knew it would fail. That struck me as far more insightful than the original version. We ought to be doing what we know is right, not what will maximize our success or praise from others. There are some battles that are worth fighting even if you believe you’re doomed to failure. Those battles are often for love or important ideas or our children. Some things are simply worth fighting for — and the truth is that you might win anyway. Do the right thing. Take the chance.

The more I understand about myself, about human nature and about the nature of reality, the more I realize I’m a radical by the standards of both Modernism and Postmodernism. Seeing the things which I’m stumbling toward makes me an enemy of many of the core ideas upon which contemporary culture is built. It exposes the culture as a monstrous lie — like a dangerous infection that’s slowly destroying what human were created to be. My “inner observer” has always known that truth was found in the ideas of the Enlightenment, but I’m slowly finding words to explain what has merely been instinct until now. The Enlightenment was humanity’s great leap forward, but shallow and arrogant thinkers for the next two centuries threw away the fruits of that achievement. We can’t go forward as a species until we go back to correct this intellectual and spiritual error — and part of that is acknowledging that our collective attempts to do away with our Creator will always fail.

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