• Skip to primary navigation
  • Skip to main content
  • Skip to primary sidebar
  • Skip to secondary sidebar
  • Email
  • Facebook
  • Instagram
  • Twitter
  • YouTube

David McElroy

An Alien Sent to Observe the Human Race

  • About

It’s hard to live in tension between what we ‘know’ and the unknown

By David McElroy · April 8, 2018

When I was a child, I expected the world to make sense. Because I believed that, I saw reason. I saw patterns. I saw order.

The longer I live, the more those patterns look like chaos and randomness to me. Over the course of my adult life, I’ve had to throw away so many things I was taught as objective truth. The more of my certainty I’ve had to give up, the more fragile and scary life feels.

The uncertainty makes me feel disoriented. The feeling makes me long for the solidity of my previous certainty — but I can’t close my eyes to the chaos, because it appears to be the truth.

Why do people believe absurd things? Why do some people believe the world is flat? Why do others believe in strange conspiracies? I think it’s because the things people believe make it easier for them to feel certain about something.

If someone believes that the Earth is the center of everything — and that it somehow rests on a firm foundation instead of being a rock hurtling through the vastness of space — that can allow him to feel more secure somehow. He doesn’t reason that out, of course, but something in his gut feels better if he believes that. The world feels more orderly to him. So he ignores evidence to the contrary. He believes what he needs to believe.

If someone believes there is a conspiracy of evil people — whether he thinks it’s evil bankers or big businessman or whoever — this allows himself to feel better about his life. He doesn’t have to take responsibility for what’s wrong with the life he lives. He doesn’t even have to feel as though the world (or his country) is out of control. He can choose to believe there is a lot of control — and he feels more comfortable thinking there is evil control than no control at all.

I was taught that we live in an age of reason. I was taught that our political leaders cared about us and that they made decisions about what would be best for everyone. I was taught that we were entering an era when poverty would be banished and humans would live in peaceful brotherhood.

The reality I face is far different.

I know from experience how crooked the political world is. I know how little connection there is between politicians’ rhetoric and their true motivations. (I used to write their words, remember.) I know that there is brutal poverty all around me. Even though the world is slowly getting richer — and the worst of the poor are better off than they once were — I know that almost none of the people I see every day even acknowledge that poverty exists. I know that people around the world continue to kill each other for the flimsiest of reasons.

I was taught certainty about all sorts of things, including theology. This has caused me serious anguish over the years as I’ve struggled to find the truth between what I had been taught and what I can experience of a Creator I know as God.

When it comes to metaphysical truth, it’s easiest to go one direction or the other — to either claim absolute faith in whatever some man preached from a pulpit or else reject everything but what science can prove. I can’t do either one of those.

I am terrified at the uncertainty I face. As I say “I don’t know” to more and more things in this world — in order to be honest with myself and others — I’m left disoriented. I don’t have many of the foundational “truths” which seemed so firm and so obvious when I was young.

Instead, what I’m left with is a huge gap between what I believe I know and what I know that I don’t know. The easy choice is to live in one of those extremes — what I believe I know or in the conviction that we know nothing except what we can see or touch or measure.

Instead, I live in the gap between those two kind of certainty. It’s a very scary place.

I want certainty to believe in. I still have faith that there is certainty. I have faith that there will be patterns in the randomness. I have faith that objective truth is still out there to be found beyond this life.

In the meantime, I find less and less about this world makes sense. Man’s ability to reason is vastly overestimated — and his tendency toward self-deception is vastly underestimated. I see a world of chaos and it makes me feel very disoriented.

I hate looking at the chaos, because I long for order. I hate admitting my uncertainty, because I desperately need certainty. I hate seeing all the ugliness, because I long for beauty.

But truth is more important than my discomfort. The world is full of chaos. It’s uncertain and seems random. It seems ugly and hateful.

I cling to my spirit’s faith that in the truth I will find patterns and certainty and beauty and love. It’s the only way I can deal with a world which disappoints and disorients me every single day.

My hope is that my faith in my Creator will lead me to truth in the end.

Share on Social Networks

Related Posts

  • Economic Man needs no heart, because love and God are dead
  • Narrow focus causes one to see a specific tree and miss the sunset
  • We live in Reverse World, where black is white and good is evil

Filed Under: Uncategorized Tagged With: chaos, culture, knowledge, metaphysics, randomness, uncertainty

Primary Sidebar

My Instagram

Instagram post 2197818212964838980_166421 This was my view along I-459 south of Birmingham Thursday evening as I inched along in traffic on the way home. There has to be a better way to make a living than driving to an office each day. #traffic #rushhour #birmingham #alabama
Instagram post 2197804368238234979_166421 The trees are finally bare around here, which creates an eerie beauty in the darkness of night. This was from our walk a few minutes ago. #nature #naturephotography #trees #night #silhouette #shotoniphone11 #birmingham #alabama
Instagram post 2196914976862997522_166421 Here’s are the highest rated photos of 2019 from my cat and dog account at @themcelroyzoo #topnine
Instagram post 2196912693844557604_166421 Here are my most highly “liked” photos of 2019 on Instagram. I find these rankings odd, because there are definitely some different photos I would have judged as better than some of these. #topnine
Instagram post 2194666102198803305_166421 Just before sunset Sunday afternoon, this was the beautiful view through the trees in my front yard. #nature #naturephotography #sky #blue #clouds #birmingham #alabama
Instagram post 2193971564161507361_166421 Just a few minutes ago, I watched the last of sunset through trees on the horizon. #nature #naturephotography #trees #sky #clouds #sunset #birmingham #alabama
Instagram post 2193959493323551515_166421 The moon was beautiful through the heavy cloud cover just before sunset Saturday afternoon. #nature #naturephotography #clouds #moon #birmingham #alabama
Instagram post 2191099055338434111_166421 The sky was beautiful behind my office as I left work Tuesday evening. #nature #naturephotography #sky #clouds #colorful #sunset #birmingham #alabama
Instagram post 2189615458475600868_166421 There were no clouds to speak of tonight, so sunset was just a background glow on the horizon. #nature #naturephotography #golden #sky #sunset #birmingham #alabama
Follow on Instagram

Critter Instagram

Instagram post 2198560502807210199_1489647434 Molly couldn’t wait any longer for the rest of us to be ready for sleep. #cat #cats #catstagram #catsofinstagram #cute #cutecat #pets #petstagram #petsofinstagram #greeneyes #instacat #ilovecats #birmingham #alabama #caturdayeve
Instagram post 2198528898869062871_1489647434 Lucy has the neighborhood under surveillance from her front yard after a midnight walk. #dog #dogs #dogstagram #dogsofinstagram #cute #cutedog #pets #petstagram #petsofinstagram #instadog #ilovedogs #birmingham #alabama
Instagram post 2198152410197980505_1489647434 Merlin’s winter beard gives him extra protection from the cold — and it also makes him seem even wiser and more ancient. #cat #cats #catstagram #catsofinstagram #cute #cutecat #pets #petstagram #petsofinstagram #merlin2020 #instacat #ilovecats #birmingham #alabama
Instagram post 2197788506703819315_1489647434 Late Thursday night, Thomas relaxes in a dark corner of the office. #cat #cats #catstagram #catsofinstagram #cute #cutecat #pets #petstagram #petsofinstagram #tabby #tabbycat #instacat #ilovecats #birmingham #alabama
Instagram post 2197762229087468779_1489647434 After divisive controversy, Time magazine has announced a new selection for Person of the Year — the one who can unite us all. #cat #cats #catstagram #catsofinstagram #cute #cutecat #pets #petstagram #petsofinstagram #merlin2020 #instacat #ilovecats #birmingham #alabama
Instagram post 2197698869645823387_1489647434 Lucy thinks her human should quit playing with his new iPhone’s wide-angle lens and get started with her walk instead. #dog #dogs #dogstagram #dogsofinstagram #cute #cutedog #pets #petstagram #petsofinstagram #instadog #ilovedogs #birmingham #alabama
Instagram post 2197423147836609398_1489647434 Molly, Thomas and Merlin huddle together for a warm nap on a cold Thursday morning. #cat #cats #catstagram #catsofinstagram #cute #cutecat #pets #petstagram #petsofinstagram #instacat #ilovecats #birmingham #alabama
Instagram post 2197024764193973519_1489647434 Lucy was sleeping but she immediately realized she was being recorded and then she heard some small sound which jolted her into being fully awake. #dog #dogs #dogstagram #dogsofinstagram #cute #cutedog #pets #petstagram #petsofinstagram #instadog #ilovedogs #birmingham #alabama
Instagram post 2197004167175099882_1489647434 Molly and the other cats sometimes seem to have deep thoughts going on in those little brains, but they just don’t share their wisdom with us. #cat #cats #catstagram #catsofinstagram #cute #cutecat #pets #petstagram #petsofinstagram #greeneyes #instacat #ilovecats #birmingham #alabama
Follow on Instagram

Contact David

David likes email, but can’t reply to every message. I get a surprisingly large number of requests for relationship advice — seriously — but time doesn’t permit a response to all of them. (Sorry.)

Subscribe

Enter your address to receive notifications by email every time new articles are posted. Then click “Subscribe.”

Donations

If you enjoy this site and want to help, click here. All donations are appreciated, no matter how large or small. (PayPal often doesn’t identify donors, so I might not be able to thank you directly.)




Search

Archives

Secondary Sidebar

Briefly

I got a note today from a woman who lives on the other side of the country and has a young son: “[Young son] says that we should meet you sometime. He just said of your profile picture that he likes your face. I have shared photos and videos of Lucy and the cats since he was really little.” This made me profoundly happy. I trust the intuitive judgment of children about people. Little ones tend to read character very well. Adults are easy to fool, but it’s much harder to fool children about who you really are. I hope I do get to meet this young man and his mom one day.

I’m in the McDonald’s near my house, sitting near the play area. There’s one little girl — maybe 5 years old — who’s here with her father. He’s about my age, so he’s older than the typical father of a 5-year-old. Even though she’s the only kid here, the girl is giggling and having fun by herself. She periodically cries out, “Daddy, look!” And then she shows off something she thinks is impressive. Then, just a moment ago, she called out very sweetly, “Daddy?” He patiently said, “Yes, sweetheart.” And then she said, “Daddy, I love you so much!” And then she went back to playing as her father looked on with happiness and love.

When I first discovered the idea of unschooling, it was so radical that I had trouble finding people who even knew what it was. Today, the idea is mainstream enough that major media outlets sometimes cover the topic in a favorable way. The Sunday newspaper supplement called Parade had a strongly favorable article about unschooling a couple of weeks ago which explained what it is and how it’s different from homeschooling. It’s less structured. There’s no curriculum. There’s plenty of flexibility. And there are no tests and grades. (Most people today are shocked to learn that testing and grading didn’t exist in schools through history until the last couple hundred years.) If you want your children to think for themselves instead of following the herd mentality that pervades every school I’ve been part of, you owe it to yourself — and to your kids — to consider taking control of your children’s development back from governments. Just because you and I survived institutional schools doesn’t mean it’s the wisest choice. Start by reading the Parade article. It might open your eyes.

In the Birmingham suburb of Hueytown, the Golden Gophers of Hueytown High School had just defeated the Eufala Tigers in the second round of the state playoffs Friday night. It’s not a game that will mean a lot to anybody outside those two communities, but it meant everything to the players and coaches involved. After the game, Hueytown defensive coordinator Trent Campbell was celebrating with his victorious players when he noticed Eufala offensive lineman Dallas Ingram distraught and alone. Campbell left his players to console the distraught Ingram and photographer Dennis Victory caught photos of the pair together. “My reaction was to go see about him, because I’ll see my guys on Sunday and next week and the rest of their high school careers, but that’s a young man we watched on film for a week and studied and he’s a fantastic player,” Campbell said later. “And it wasn’t too long ago when I played my last high school football game and I know what that feeling is and you sort of never forget that. I went to tell him what a great player I thought he was and what a great game I thought they played and I wish nobody had to lose that night because it was an incredible game.” This is what sports at the high school level should be about. Winning is great and winning is fun. But humanity and decency last longer.

I have changed radically about some things over the years, but probably none of those changes have been as great as the ways that I feel about people who are viewed as evil or criminal. When I was young, I was eager to see criminals or foreign political enemies killed. Today, I don’t view such people though rose-colored glasses and I don’t view them as blameless folks who are going to turn their lives around if we just think happy thoughts. But I can’t celebrate the death of anybody, even if he might deserve it in some ways of thinking about it. Even if it’s sometimes necessary to kill someone — and those cases are often debatable — I regret the death of someone who will now never have a chance to discover love and change his life. There are some evil people in this world, but I can’t celebrate their deaths.

Read More

Crass Capitalism

Before you buy anything from Amazon, please click on this ad. I’ll get a tiny commission, but it won’t cost you a nickel extra. The cats and I thank you. (If you’re using an ad-blocker and can’t see the ad, you can click here instead.)

© 2011–2019 · All Rights Reserved
Built by: 1955 DESIGN