• Skip to primary navigation
  • Skip to main content
  • Skip to primary sidebar
  • Skip to secondary sidebar
  • Email
  • Facebook
  • Instagram
  • Twitter
  • YouTube

David McElroy

An Alien Sent to Observe the Human Race

  • About
  • Podcasts

Was he angry to lose his family? Or because he lost his control?

By David McElroy · January 5, 2021

I didn’t pay much attention to the two women who sat near me at dinner. They weren’t eating anything, but they sat talking quietly in the dining room. It was a slow night, so the fast food restaurant was almost empty.

One of the women stood — almost nervously — as a man came in to join them. He had the air of someone who liked to give orders and who thought he should be obeyed. It wasn’t a friendly meeting.

“Why is she here?” the man hissed angrily to the woman who was still seated.

“Holly asked me to come so she wouldn’t be alone,“ the standing woman replied in a tone that made it sound as though she was trying to avoid trouble.

The man sat at the table and I couldn’t hear exactly where the conversation went at first. The seated woman pulled some papers out from a manilla envelope. She pushed the documents toward the man without much explanation.

Everything suddenly clicked. Holly and the angry man were starting to go through a divorce.

Until a few days ago, I had never heard of Divorce Day. It’s the first working Monday of a new year and that’s when a lot of divorce proceedings apparently kick off. Some lawyers and therapists say it’s a myth, but others say it’s a very real thing.

Some say that it seems some unhappy married people are resolute about starting the new year by taking this step. Others say the spike happens because a lot of people don’t start the process until Christmas is over, simply because they don’t want to “spoil the holiday” for family members and especially for children.

I don’t know the details of what was going on — or why they had to meet tonight — but Holly was the one leaving him. I heard her call him Jack a couple of times. They were probably around 40 years old.

The woman who was Holly’s moral support had to go to her car to get something. Holly looked down at the table, then she looked outside as though she was looking for her friend. She didn’t seem to want to look at Jack. She didn’t seem to want to say more than she had to.

“You said you would never leave me,” Jack abruptly said without context. “You’re supposed to be mine, no matter what happens.”

Holly finally looked up and seemed to meet his eyes.

“Nobody should have to live with what I’ve had from you for seven years,” she said. “You’re a bad husband and a worse father. I can’t take it. I deserve better. I know that now.”

“You knew who I was when you married me,” Jack said. “You didn’t mind it when all your friends thought I was the great catch from a rich family. You worshipped me.”

Holly was quiet for a long moment.

“I’ve grown up since then, Jack,” she said. “Your childish ways seemed funny then. I thought being married would make you mature. I’ve matured and I’ve changed. I thought you would change, too. That sounds dumb now, but I really did.”

“But you knew who I was and you promised to stick with me,” Jack said with anger. “You promised. You can’t leave me.”

“We’ve been through this,” she said.

Holly started to say something else, but she stopped.

Then the other woman came back inside. She had a small box that she handed to Jack, who took the box without opening it. Then the two women stood to leave.

“You said you wouldn’t ever leave me,” Jack said again. He sounded angry, but he also sounded as though he was accustomed to the woman obeying him. It wasn’t clear whether he was upset that his marriage was ending or that Holly would no longer obey him. He looked at her almost like one might look at a toy that had stopped working.

The two women got up and left without much else being said. Jack sat there watching them as they got into a car to drive away. Then his phone rang.

“Hey, Jessie!” he said brightly. “Yeah, I’m through with the bitch. I’m coming your way now. I already got a bottle of wine and I’m ready for some lovin’ from you, little girl.”

Jack was still on the phone as he walked out. He wasn’t skipping a beat as he went from one failed relationship directly to the next. Some people never learn from their mistakes.

Share on Social Networks

Related Posts

  • How we live our lives can allow us to redeem a dark family history
  • ‘American Idol’ reveals more about our society than we’d like to admit
  • KKK-loving newspaper owner has always been a nut; this isn’t news

Filed Under: Uncategorized

Primary Sidebar

My Instagram

Tonight’s sunset was very soft and delicate, lik Tonight’s sunset was very soft and delicate, like something from a painting with pastels. #nature #naturephotography #sky #colorful #clouds #sunset #birmingham #alabama
I am endlessly fascinated by the beauty of bare tr I am endlessly fascinated by the beauty of bare tree branches against a night sky, but my photos of such scenes never seem to quite match the loveliness of what I see in person. #nature #naturephotography #tree #night #sky #birmingham #alabama
I stopped at the Cahaba River bridge on I-459 just I stopped at the Cahaba River bridge on I-459 just south of Birmingham to catch this sunset shot on the way home from work Tuesday evening. #nature #naturephotography #sky #colorful #clouds #sunset #birmingham #alabama
Just after I left the office Friday afternoon, I s Just after I left the office Friday afternoon, I saw this beautiful sunset and had to stop to record it. I accidentally shot it with too high an ISO, so it’s far more grainy than it should have been. #nature #naturephotography #sky #colorful #clouds #sunset #birmingham #alabama
I love the way the moon looks through the bare bra I love the way the moon looks through the bare branches of a tree in my front yard tonight. On a cold night such as this one, it can sometimes seem as though the winter will never end and spring will never arrive. #nature #naturephotography #sky #night #tree #moon #birmingham #alabama
Ever since a neighbor strung some decorative light Ever since a neighbor strung some decorative lights in his back yard a year or so ago, I’ve been trying to figure out how to photograph them. In person, the effect is stunning on the yard, but I’ve struggled to figure out any sort of perspective that would be interesting. I’m still not entirely happy with this, but it’s th best I’ve been able to come up with so far. #lights #backyard #birmingham #alabama
It’s 27 degrees in Birmingham after midnight, bu It’s 27 degrees in Birmingham after midnight, but the thick fog covering my neighborhood right now makes it feel magical enough to ignore the miserable cold for a few minutes. #nature #naturephotography #fog #trees #night #birmingham #alabama
As I was getting into the car after work just afte As I was getting into the car after work just after 5 p.m., I looked up and saw this beautiful full moon shining through the bare limbs of a nearby tree. #nature #naturephotography #tree #moon #birmingham #alabama
Here are the top nine photos I’ve posted on this Here are the top nine photos I’ve posted on this account in 2020, as determined by your “likes.” #topnine
Follow on Instagram

Critter Instagram

Molly keeps a silent vigil over the office in the Molly keeps a silent vigil over the office in the wee hours of Saturday morning while the other cats are already asleep. #cat #cats #catstagram #catsofinstagram #cute #cutecat #pets #petstagram #petsofinstagram #greeneyes #instacat #ilovecats #birmingham #alabama #caturday
After a nice midnight walk — in perfect 66-degre After a nice midnight walk — in perfect 66-degree weather — Lucy wants to stay on the porch to sniff the night air and listen to dogs barking in the distance. #dog #dogs #dogstagram #dogsofinstagram #cute #cutedog #pets #petstagram #petsofinstagram #instadog #ilovedogs #birmingham #alabama
Merlin is the unquestioned ruler of the animal wor Merlin is the unquestioned ruler of the animal world in my house. He doesn’t push his weight around, but he clearly knows he’s royalty — and the others treat him with due respect. #cat #cats #catstagram #catsofinstagram #cute #cutecat #pets #petstagram #petsofinstagram #merlin2024 #instacat #ilovecats #birmingham #alabama
For “throwback Thursday,” here’s Bessie from For “throwback Thursday,” here’s Bessie from almost six years ago. Molly and her twin sister were only about 8 years old in June 2015, but she looked more like a kitten here. #cats #tbt
Molly contemplates life late Monday night as she r Molly contemplates life late Monday night as she relaxes on her warming pad in the office. #cat #cats #catstagram #catsofinstagram #cute #cutecat #pets #petstagram #petsofinstagram #greeneyes #instacat #ilovecats #birmingham #alabama
You might have noticed that Thomas always insists You might have noticed that Thomas always insists on wearing his white vest for photos. He’s very proper. #cat #cats #catstagram #catsofinstagram #cute #cutecat #pets #petstagram #petsofinstagram #tabby #tabbycat #instacat #ilovecats #birmingham #alabama
I’m having dinner at a restaurant and just check I’m having dinner at a restaurant and just checked on the cats via CritterCam, which showed Thomas, left, and Merlin cuddled up as they slept. #cat #cats #catstagram #catsofinstagram #cute #cutecat #pets #petstagram #petsofinstagram #instacat #ilovecats #birmingham #alabama
Merlin is enjoying the warm Saturday afternoon sun Merlin is enjoying the warm Saturday afternoon sunshine in an office window. #cat #cats #catstagram #catsofinstagram #cute #cutecat #pets #petstagram #petsofinstagram #merlin2024 #instacat #ilovecats #birmingham #alabama #caturday
It’s a few minutes after 2 a.m. and it’s 27 de It’s a few minutes after 2 a.m. and it’s 27 degrees outside, but Lucy has decided it’s time to go for another walk. #dog #dogs #dogstagram #dogsofinstagram #cute #cutedog #pets #petstagram #petsofinstagram #instadog #ilovedogs #birmingham #alabama
Follow on Instagram

Contact David

David likes email, but can’t reply to every message. I get a surprisingly large number of requests for relationship advice — seriously — but time doesn’t permit a response to all of them. (Sorry.)

Subscribe

Enter your address to receive notifications by email every time new articles are posted. Then click “Subscribe.”

Donations

If you enjoy this site and want to help, click here. All donations are appreciated, no matter how large or small. (PayPal often doesn’t identify donors, so I might not be able to thank you directly.)




Search

Archives

Secondary Sidebar

Briefly

Tyler Barnes will never be a basketball star. He probably peaked as a star high school player in Louisville, Ky. But for the last four years, he’s been a walk-on player for the University of Alabama. He’s a chemical engineering major with lots of academic honors who rides the bench because he loves being part of a team. He sometimes gets into games with a minute or two to go, but only if Alabama has a big lead. This Saturday, it was senior day for Alabama basketball, so it was his last chance to play in Coleman Coliseum. Alabama Coach Nate Oats says that one of the team starter’s came to him an hour before the game started — and fellow senior Alex Reese asked Oats if Barnes could start in his place for this one game. Even though the game was huge for Alabama, which is ranked No. 6 in the country and trying to wrap up an SEC title, Oats agreed. Barnes started and played the first three minutes, grabbing what was only the fourth rebound of his career and missing his only shot. Barnes has a great future as an engineer, but you’ll never again hear from him as a basketball player. For three shining minutes Saturday, though, he was a starter for a top-10 college basketball team — and his parents were in the stands from Kentucky to see it. There’s a lot of ugliness in college basketball right now, but this story makes me happy.

It was five years ago tonight when Lucy first rode in the car with me. She was on her way to her “forever home” with me that night, but she didn’t know it, so she was terrified. It was a much happier and braver girl who took a ride in the car tonight so we could go through a drive-through window and order a hamburger for her — to celebrate five years with me. She had a great time. If she could remember five years ago tonight, she would be proud of how far she’s come, too. If you’d like to know more about Lucy’s journey from scared dog to brave queen of the household, here’s something I wrote after her first year with me. I’m hoping this girl will have many more happy years with me.

I’ve never been attracted to skinny women. There’s nothing wrong with someone who’s naturally thin, but it’s never been my preference. What has shocked me, though, is the judgment I’ve heard from women all through my life — about themselves and others — about who’s “fat.” I concluded long ago that most women in our culture have been brainwashed to believe that skinny is attractive — and that anything other than skinny is ugly. I first assumed that I was the oddball — for preferring women with bigger and heavier bodies — but I’m coming to the conclusion that most men naturally feel this way to one extent or another. I just ran across new research by a couple of Northwestern University psychology professors that shows that women seriously overestimate how much a straight man will be attracted to a skinny woman. In a perfect world, we would all be at a healthy weight, but when it comes to attractiveness, too heavy is more attractive than skinny. At least to me — and to a lot of men, too.

Years ago, I heard a question that seemed very insightful at the time. You’ve probably heard it, too. What would you do if you knew you couldn’t fail? The question is intended to help you uncover things you really want to do, but which you’re afraid to try — for fear of failure. In an interview today, I heard the great marketing guru Seth Godin give a different point of view. He said the better question is to ask what you would do even if you knew it would fail. That struck me as far more insightful than the original version. We ought to be doing what we know is right, not what will maximize our success or praise from others. There are some battles that are worth fighting even if you believe you’re doomed to failure. Those battles are often for love or important ideas or our children. Some things are simply worth fighting for — and the truth is that you might win anyway. Do the right thing. Take the chance.

The more I understand about myself, about human nature and about the nature of reality, the more I realize I’m a radical by the standards of both Modernism and Postmodernism. Seeing the things which I’m stumbling toward makes me an enemy of many of the core ideas upon which contemporary culture is built. It exposes the culture as a monstrous lie — like a dangerous infection that’s slowly destroying what human were created to be. My “inner observer” has always known that truth was found in the ideas of the Enlightenment, but I’m slowly finding words to explain what has merely been instinct until now. The Enlightenment was humanity’s great leap forward, but shallow and arrogant thinkers for the next two centuries threw away the fruits of that achievement. We can’t go forward as a species until we go back to correct this intellectual and spiritual error — and part of that is acknowledging that our collective attempts to do away with our Creator will always fail.

Read More

Crass Capitalism

Before you buy anything from Amazon, please click on this ad. I’ll get a tiny commission, but it won’t cost you a nickel extra. The cats and I thank you. (If you’re using an ad-blocker and can’t see the ad, you can click here instead.)

© 2011–2021 · All Rights Reserved
Built by: 1955 DESIGN