When I was a little boy, the wait for Christmas each year seemed to take forever. Even in the summer — or even after school had started back in the fall — the weeks until Christmas went by at a snail’s pace.
If you can remember being a child — and dreaming about what you might get for Christmas or whatever holiday your family celebrated — you probably remember feeling the same way.
When you’re 5 years old, the time until another Christmas represents 20 percent of the time you’ve been alive. That might as well have been forever back then.
When I thought about what I would be in the future — when I got old enough to start having oversized ambitions for myself — my life seemed to stretch to eternity. My parents had lived half their lives. My grandparents have lived most of theirs. But I had forever to become what I was meant to be.
For the first time in my life, I feel a clock ticking. I no longer have forever. I have decades left in which I can live and love, but the years are flying by. The time from one Christmas to the next is now a blur.
I still have plenty of time, but it’s no longer forever. And for the first time in my life, I’m feeling a fear I’ve never known. What if I don’t find the love and the life I’ve always needed?

Shared misery: Nobody can have air conditioning unless everyone can
Homeless man on a cold night leaves me with hard questions
Without the state, who would plow roads? We and our neighbors will
Time with couple reminds me how much I miss good conversation
Please be patient with my site as it’s being completely remodeled
Why do we ‘need’ the newest thing? Is that where people get their joy?
Left’s refusal to criticize Obama because he’s black is simply racist
I wasn’t allowed to express need, so I’ve spent life traveling alone