I’ve been dealing with someone lately whose dishonesty is costing me a couple thousand dollars. Maybe a bit more.
I really want to be angry at him. I want to be bitter. I want to stone him — figuratively speaking — for what he’s done to me.
But I can’t throw this stone at him, because I’ve been a liar, too.
It’s hard for me to angrily attack someone else’s dishonesty — because my past hypocrisy shouts back and points its finger at me.
The longer I live, the more I understand that honesty is a fundamental value that goes to the core of what a person is. That sounds like something from a Boy Scout pledge or maybe a Sunday school lesson, but it’s genuinely foundational to a person’s character.
I haven’t always known this for myself, even though I would have given lip service to the principle all along.
I’ve told you before that I learned to be a very good liar as I grew up. I learned the nuances of lying — and the justifications for it — from the master liar who raised me. I was really good at it. And I didn’t see the contradiction in my life, much less the fracture it caused in my values and in my heart.
So what does all that mean when someone lies to me today?

Why is it ‘isolationism’ to oppose killing those who didn’t attack us?
Grow veggies in your own yard? ‘You’re heading to jail, you criminal’
Science or bias? What if there’s no proof that eating fat will kill you?
Photo assignment in dimly lit gym kickstarted my love for basketball
Watching kids on a Friday night reminds me of struggle to belong
Will rising anger about personal economic pain lead to trouble soon?
Ghost from my past haunts me, but leaves me without answers
When you compromise principles, you soon won’t recognize yourself