For the first time in my life, I’m happy. At least some of the time.
That’s not exactly the right word — when I say “happy” — but it’s the best way I know to describe it. Have I ever experienced happiness before? Yes, of course. But when I’ve been happy in the past, it’s always been that I’ve felt happy about something in particular.
I was happy that a woman loved me. I was happy that I’d solved a major problem. Or gotten something new. Achieved something that made me feel good for a moment.
But there was always an expiration date on those things, even if I often didn’t understand that. If I felt happy that a particular woman loved me — someone who I had wanted, for instance — I typically felt as though this was the one thing that would make me happy for life.
But there was always something missing. Something was wrong.
Once the relationship died — or the shiny new object lost its shine — I always grew restless. Something inside me was always looking for the next big thing that would make me happy.
Slowly — without me consciously noticing it — something changed. A miracle happened.

I don’t really hate you, honest; I’m just afraid you may hurt me
Your motivations tell me more about you than your actions do
This is my new wife, Claire — but she doesn’t actually exist
Be careful what you hunger for; it’s very often not what you need
Peshawar murders show need to support those who share our values
Peace won’t come until you quit obeying long-gone programmers
Liberal NPR, PBS? Why should tax money pay to influence culture?
Being in love shows us who we can choose to be at our very best