I have trouble giving up on people.
It’s not just people, though. It’s more accurate to say I have trouble giving up on whatever fantasy of the future that I’ve created in my mind. Sometimes that involves people. Sometimes it’s an achievement I’ve set my heart on. It can be any fantasy of what I think my life is going to look like.
I fall in love with my fantasies, I suppose. My life will be perfect when I make this thing happen. Everything will be perfect when this woman loves me and we live happily ever after.
And when I figure out that I’ve been chasing the wrong thing, I have trouble letting go of it. I have trouble saying that this thing is never going to happen. It’s hard for me to admit that maybe the thing I’ve been chasing was never good for me anyway.
When I stubbornly cling to dreams that are already dead, I sometimes allow myself to miss better opportunities. I sometimes mope so much about what I can’t have — even something I’ve decided isn’t good for me — that I miss better choices.
It’s been very difficult for me to stop watering dead flowers.

We live in Reverse World, where black is white and good is evil
Try a new game: Make others smile — and let yourself smile with them
What if we’ve completely missed the point of loving other people?
Who ‘owns’ children? And who should step in when parents fail?
Bride is 89 and the groom is 86,
Anonymous ‘Santas’ secretly paying for families’ Christmas layaways
Collective freak-out over tasteless shirt points to double standard
Is Paul Krugman serious or is this some kind of weird performance art?
Social media can be dangerous for those of us raised by narcissists