When I was young, I wanted to be great. I wanted to be important, successful and powerful. I wanted to be put onto a pedestal, where I could get the adulation and approval I craved.
I wouldn’t have put it that way then, of course. I just thought I wanted the things my culture presented as normal goals for someone like me. (I understand now the degree to which being raised by a narcissistic father left me craving approval and attention.)
As I’ve gotten more emotionally healthy and psychologically mature, I’ve been surprised to find out that my desires in life have changed. It’s not that I’ve “given up.” It’s not that I’m settling for something easy after failing to achieve things I wanted.
My desires today are healthier and far more likely to make me happy. You see, I want to be ordinary. I want to be a good man. I want to be kind and loving and content with the joy of living an ordinary human life.
But I’ve recently discovered a fascinating paradox. As an ordinary man, I won’t have the things this world and our culture have always promised me. I won’t have wealth or power or adulation. But it turns out that the people who gain what the world and our culture promise won’t have what I have.
They won’t have the peace and contentment and joy of a man who’s living a simple and ordinary life.

Pro-free market candidates don’t promise price targets on gasoline
Healthy romance features mutual growth, not just ‘take me as I am’
Real-life ‘ghost story’: The tale of a house that didn’t want me there
My father’s embezzling started and ended my newspaper company
English teacher tells Wellesley grads: ‘You’re nothing special’ — not yet
Aren’t you thankful for the right to vote before they take your money?
Free speech is our natural right, not a gift granted by politicians
Surreal dream wakes, shakes me; which is reality, which is dream?