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David McElroy

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House design reflects our vision and helps shape who we become

By David McElroy · March 1, 2018

As I drove through an upscale suburban Birmingham neighborhood Thursday afternoon, I couldn’t help thinking how much I hated the houses — and how stifling I found the oppressive designs.

I laughed at myself, though, because I knew I was one of the very few people in town who would think such a thing. This neighborhood is popular and desirable. The irony was that I was driving to a $250,000 home which my own realty clients were buying in just a few minutes.

The house is exactly what the couple wanted, particularly the wife. She loves a stately home that’s very traditional two-story in red brick — and this neighborhood has variations of that in abundance. And I was about to be paid a commission for helping them to find and buy a house which they loved — and which I would have considered oppressive and stifling.

Design matters to me. Beauty matters to me. Graceful use of space and light and angles makes my heart soar and gives me peace. (The picture above is a random example of such an interior.) But to the people who love these traditional brick homes — which look as though they’re cold copies of copies of copies to me — my beautiful design represents something frightening.

I can usually tell how well my intellectual and emotional spirit would mesh with a place based on the sort of design which dominates the area. One of the ways I’ve known for years that Birmingham will probably always be too conservative for me — speaking in the intellectual sense, not the political sense — is the dominant feel of its most popular neighborhoods.

It’s very rare to find a local neighborhood where I would feel truly at home. (Mount Laurel is the only one that comes to mind — and that seems to attract oddballs like me who happen to have money.) The neighborhoods that are truly popular — the ones where I show clients and am happy to collect commissions — are filled with bad copies of houses that have been built over and over again.

Don’t misunderstand. I don’t try to steer real estate clients to houses that fit my own intellectual and emotional understanding. I help them buy what they want. But I don’t envy the homes they are proud to call their own when we’re finished.

I know it sounds a bit odd, but cities can have personalities. It’s almost as though the collective spirits of the people who live there form an organism that has a spirit and mind of its own. The people whose spirits collectively form Birmingham don’t reflect who I am, even though I’ll always feel a connection to the place. Unless I go to “weird and artsy” parts of town, the overall spirit is far from who I am.

But I walk a fine line between conservative in lifestyle and liberal in intellect and emotional orientation. It’s hard to find where I fit. It’s hard to find someone who’s more conservative in orientation and values than I am, but something in my mind rejected a conservative intellectual orientation decades ago — and nothing represented my change in that respect as much as my preferences in architecture.

At one time, the houses of these very traditional neighborhoods would have been my preference, too. That’s what I grew up liking. It wasn’t until I was about 30 years old that some switch flipped in my mind. I started changing. I suddenly “got” a lot of incredible modern design that had never clicked for me. Ever since then, I have been like a fish out of water — eager to find a place for myself to fit.

Our homes and neighborhoods don’t just reflect who we are. They also shape who we are. In ways which I can’t understand — but which I’ve seen over and over again — our built environments shape what we value and what we become. If we’re living and working in poorly designed places — places which don’t feed something in our hearts and minds — we end up adopting the values that created those designs. (I’m not going to get into this deeply at the moment, but if you doubt this, think about the correlation between different types of theology and different design philosophies that come with them. The spartan Calvinist mindset creates very different church spaces than the very different traditional Catholic churches, for instance.)

Living in beautiful organic design (such as that represented by the best work of the late architect Frank Lloyd Wright) leads to a very different mindset than the one produced by living in cookie-cutter houses that might as well be made out of Legos.

I couldn’t make a living selling houses in Birmingham of the sort I prefer. This is a very traditional city that likes its architecture to look a certain way. (Even the neighborhood covenants for the place where I sold a house today requires nothing but traditional design.) It’s not what I want. It’s not what I need. But I don’t know where I need to be.

I appreciate my real estate clients. They’re how I hope to make my living, at least for awhile. But I feel a bit like a veggie-hating, steak-loving guy who’s working in a very popular vegetarian restaurant. I know what everybody else likes — but I need to eat elsewhere.

I love beautiful organic design and I hope to build something amazing for my own family one day. (I actually found the perfect architect for me years ago who was with a firm in Minneapolis, and he said he could build anywhere in the country.)

I’m eager to have a home that would be an intellectual, spiritual and emotional refuge for a happy and loving family. The kind of home you choose for such a family can go a long way toward laying the foundation for what kind of group they’re going to become. I hope I find the right woman to understand this in the way that I do — because I just can’t take a permanent life in one of the cookie-cutter homes which are so popular in modern American suburbia.

But in the meantime, I’ll be happy to sell you one of those if you want it in Birmingham.

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I didn’t have time to stop and I didn’t have m I didn’t have time to stop and I didn’t have my “real” camera with me anyway, but this is what my iPhone was able to get just a few minutes before sunset as I drove west on I-20 just east of Birmingham about an hour ago. #nature #naturephotography #sky #colorful #clouds #sunset #birmingham #alabama
This was the Birmingham sunset at about 8 p.m. Fri This was the Birmingham sunset at about 8 p.m. Friday. #nature #naturephotography #sky #colorful #clouds #sunset #birmingham #alabama
I was in the back yard with my dog at 5:30 a.m. an I was in the back yard with my dog at 5:30 a.m. and it suddenly started getting beautifully pink and magenta in the sky beyond the trees. I didn’t have time to go get my “real” camera, but this is what my iPhone caught of the lovely little display around us. #nature #naturephotography #sky #colorful #clouds #sunrise #birmingham #alabama
I tried to get Alex to pose for a portrait in the I tried to get Alex to pose for a portrait in the studio tonight, but I never figured out a way to get him to look at the camera. He was fascinated by the studio, though, and he purred the whole time. This was the place where I took the first photos of him on the night I captured him when he was a feral kitten. #cat #cats #catstagram #catsofinstagram #cute #cutecat #pets #petstagram #petsofinstagram #tabby #tabbycat #instacat #ilovecats #birmingham #alabama
I apparently have way too much time on my hands. I I apparently have way too much time on my hands. I’ll let you know if any of the toy companies agree to pick this up as a featured toy for the upcoming Christmas season. Thanks, ChatGPT. 😺
Thunderstorms are just starting here, so I stopped Thunderstorms are just starting here, so I stopped on the way home — about a mile from my house — for some dramatic lightning photos. #nature #naturephotography #sky #lightning #night #thunderstorms #birmingham #alabama
This was the Friday evening sunset near my house a This was the Friday evening sunset near my house about half an hour ago. #nature #naturephotography #sky #colorful #clouds #sunset #birmingham #alabama
Lucy and I are taking her last walk of the day and Lucy and I are taking her last walk of the day and it’s just starting to rain lightly. The misting rain and low-lying fog that diffused the light from nearby street lamps give the night a magical feeling.
It seems as though the trees turned bare of their It seems as though the trees turned bare of their leaves almost overnight when I wasn’t paying attention. This is part of the neighborhood route that Lucy and I walk every night. #nature #naturephotography #sky #nightsky #iphone #birmingham #alabama
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This is the first time in hours that Sam has opene This is the first time in hours that Sam has opened his sleepy eyes Friday afternoon. He was still curled up in his favorite bed when I left the house. #cat #cats #catstagram #catsofinstagram #cute #cutecat #blackcat #blackcats #pets #petstagram #petsofinstagram #instacat #ilovecats #birmingham #alabama
Oliver is snoozing on the castle earlier than usua Oliver is snoozing on the castle earlier than usual Thursday night. He looks as though he’s already ready for bed. #cat #cats #catstagram #catsofinstagram #cute #cutecat #pets #petstagram #petsofinstagram #instacat #ilovecats #birmingham #alabama
For “throwback Thursday,” here’s the lovely For “throwback Thursday,” here’s the lovely Charlotte from nine years ago. Charlotte was one of Molly’s kittens and she was one of the most beautiful and unusual cats I’ve ever been around. I lost her only about a month after this photo was taken, even though she was only 7 years old. I’ll never know what was going on the genes of that entire feline family, but none of them lived long lives — and the vet couldn’t pinpoint the cause for any of them. I always loved Charlotte’s beautiful green eyes against that striking dark gold fur. I don’t think I’ve ever seen precisely that color on a cat. #tbt #cat #cats #catstagram #catsofinstagram #cute #cutecat #pets #petstagram #petsofinstagram #instacat #ilovecats #birmingham #alabama
Oliver and Alex were waiting for me in an office w Oliver and Alex were waiting for me in an office window when I arrived home just now. #cat #cats #catstagram #catsofinstagram #cute #cutecat #pets #petstagram #petsofinstagram #instacat #ilovecats #birmingham #alabama
Alex is hanging off the side of the castle because Alex is hanging off the side of the castle because he’s been using that long arm to swipe at the toy mouse we’ve been playing with. Alex is the only one of the current three cats who genuinely loves toys — and this particular fabric mouse has been his favorite since he was a kitten. #cat #cats #catstagram #catsofinstagram #cute #cutecat #pets #petstagram #petsofinstagram #tabby #tabbycat #instacat #ilovecats #birmingham #alabama
Sam hasn’t been with us for quite a year, but I Sam hasn’t been with us for quite a year, but I think he’s made great progress in converting himself into a lazy indoor cat. He’s had a couple of excellent role models in the pursuit of this behavior, of course. #cat #cats #catstagram #catsofinstagram #cute #cutecat #blackcat #blackcats #pets #petstagram #petsofinstagram #instacat #ilovecats #birmingham #alabama
From the CritterCam: The birds outside this office From the CritterCam: The birds outside this office window are lucky that Alex can’t get to the other side of the glass Tuesday morning or else this would be the last day of their little lives. #cat #cats #catstagram #catsofinstagram #cute #cutecat #pets #petstagram #petsofinstagram #tabby #tabbycat #instacat #ilovecats #birmingham #alabama
Alex relaxes on the castle just after midnight aft Alex relaxes on the castle just after midnight after a long and busy day. #cat #cats #catstagram #catsofinstagram #cute #cutecat #pets #petstagram #petsofinstagram #tabby #tabbycat #instacat #ilovecats #birmingham #alabama
From the CritterCam: I’ll bet Sam is having more From the CritterCam: I’ll bet Sam is having more fun watching the neighborhood at home than I’m having showing houses an hour away. #cat #cats #catstagram #catsofinstagram #cute #cutecat #blackcat #blackcats #pets #petstagram #petsofinstagram #instacat #ilovecats #birmingham #alabama
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