When I was young, I wanted to be great. I wanted to be important, successful and powerful. I wanted to be put onto a pedestal, where I could get the adulation and approval I craved.
I wouldn’t have put it that way then, of course. I just thought I wanted the things my culture presented as normal goals for someone like me. (I understand now the degree to which being raised by a narcissistic father left me craving approval and attention.)
As I’ve gotten more emotionally healthy and psychologically mature, I’ve been surprised to find out that my desires in life have changed. It’s not that I’ve “given up.” It’s not that I’m settling for something easy after failing to achieve things I wanted.
My desires today are healthier and far more likely to make me happy. You see, I want to be ordinary. I want to be a good man. I want to be kind and loving and content with the joy of living an ordinary human life.
But I’ve recently discovered a fascinating paradox. As an ordinary man, I won’t have the things this world and our culture have always promised me. I won’t have wealth or power or adulation. But it turns out that the people who gain what the world and our culture promise won’t have what I have.
They won’t have the peace and contentment and joy of a man who’s living a simple and ordinary life.

Man’s unconscious night after stroke leaves me uneasy about living alone
AUDIO: If we’ve experienced hurt, why do we keep trusting in love?
What if our craving for dopamine drives our desires and addictions?
To save my own sanity, it’s time for me to shut up about Trump
EU says it might block people from getting their own money from banks
I’m not certain artists ever get to be themselves when they perform
Just a sandwich: Why do people make everything so political?
In a vulnerable moment, woman confesses she’s scared to change
We rarely have wisdom we need ’til it’s too late to avoid mistakes