Think about the worst decision you’ve ever made — the one thing you know you should have done differently.
“If only someone could’ve warned me,” you might think. “If I had just known, everything would be different today.”
I’ve thought things similar to that. After things end in ways that make me unhappy, I tend to go back and find the one moment — and there usually is one moment — when I made a decision or took an action that caused what I’m unhappy about.
I’m prone to thinking how different things could be if I had a time machine to go back to that moment. But I wonder whether that’s true.
I found out this evening that a young woman who I casually know has gotten engaged. She hasn’t been dating the guy very long — and everyone who knows her seems to have very negative impressions of the way he treats her.
As she stood there this evening showing me her ring, I knew better than to express my misgivings. She wouldn’t listen — just as I suspect I wouldn’t have listened if someone had warned me before my own major mistakes.

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After 50 years of lonely pursuit and disappointment, boy finally gets girl