What’s your goal? Do you want to blow off steam or find solutions?

By David McElroy · August 29, 2011

It seems as though I’m seeing stronger and stronger expressions of political anger lately. If you read that and thought, “Well, of course we’re angry. The other side is so unreasonable,” this is for you.

The people you’re angry with are just as convinced they’re right as you’re convinced that you’re right. “But they’re dishonest,” you say. “They must know that they’re wrong. They have other motives.”

I’m here to disagree with you about that. There are a very few people who get into politics purely as charlatans, but very few. Mostly, they got into it because they were attracted to the political process (and the power involved in it) and they believed that the political position they took was obviously the right one.

The vast majority of liberal progressive Democrats sincerely believe that conservative Republicans are selfish, greedy racists. The vast majority of socially conservative Republicans honestly believe that liberal Democrats are immoral, evil idiots. Various other groups have similarly distorted views about people they oppose. The truth is that almost everybody honestly believes he’s right. The problem is that we have a system that allows only one group to get its way.

I used to get very angry in political discussions. For that matter, I used to get very angry and bent out of shape about a lot of stupid disagreements. I took policy disagreements as personal rejection of some sort. I’m embarrassed at how strongly I felt that way. I’m also embarrassed about some of the ways I’ve acted in online arguments — even when I was right — when it would have been so much more mature (and less time-consuming) to simply disagree and walk away.

For me, that was a character flaw based on a deep fear of rejection, but other people have different reasons for their own extreme anger. A lot of people are frustrated because they don’t know what to do. A lot of other people are scared by change they see going on (and the discomfort makes them angry). As the country’s demographics naturally change — as they always do — we’re going to see more anger from these sort of people, because massive change is coming, no matter who decides what happens in the future.

You need to ask yourself what your goal is. Why are you involved in politics or writing or agitation or whatever it is you’re doing to express your anger? Is your goal to express your anger and make sure that others know why you’re angry? Or is it your goal to find solutions to get what you want?

If you’re just blowing off steam, I have a suggestion. I realize most people won’t take it. (I probably wouldn’t have been either until my psychological epiphany about the source of my anger a couple of years ago.) I’m going to suggest that you’re hurting yourself — not your opponents — with your rage. Further, I’m going to suggest that you aren’t accomplishing anything that will help get you closer to where you want to be.

In the sermon I heard Sunday night from Dr. David Platt at the Church at Brook Hills, he asked how many of us were praying for our political enemies. “It’s hard to hate someone who you’re praying for,” he said, paraphrased as best I can without the audio recording.

Whether you care about loving your enemies or not, the expressions of anger we see around us aren’t doing any good. They’re simply adding more powder to an increasingly dangerous pile of explosive material. It’s going to be ugly if the fuse is ever lit on that powder — and nobody wins that kind of fight.

The problem isn’t the people we disagree with. The problem is a system that requires us to fight against everybody for supreme power. Reject the notion that we have to fight. Accept the notion that there are solutions outside the current political system. Accept the idea that you’re going to be happier to find a solution that will work for you and your children and future generations. The “call to anger” that you’re putting out to everybody is only making you bitter and raising your blood pressure.

Our opponents aren’t generally evil. They’re just wrong. We need to work toward solutions that can get what we all think we want — even though I think a lot of groups will be unhappy with what they claim they want.

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A state legislator in Maine has been stripped of the ability to speak in the state Legislature — and her votes are not being counted on legislative issues — all because she made a truthful social media post. Rep. Laurel Libby (R-Auburn, Maine) opposes allowing boys to compete against girls’ teams in school athletics and she’s become known for making an issue of it. On Feb. 17, she posted on Facebook about a recent example that she found outrageous. She posted side-by-side photos of a boy named John who competed last year in a state track event and won fifth place against other boys two years ago — and a photo of the same boy (now called Katie) who won first place in the same event this year against girls. Whether you find this outrageous or not, Libby is clearly being honest and truthful about the objective facts of an issue of public importance. But the state Legislature censured her. Democrats decreed that she could not speak in the House and that her votes would not count on legislation — until she apologized for the outrage of telling the truth. She refused and her constituents have been unrepresented in the state House since then. The people who promote this ideology are out of touch with reality and won’t rest until they force the rest of us to join them in this delusion. But even if you agree with “trans” ideology, you should be appalled at this heavy-handed attack on political speech.

The late Steve Jobs was at the center of our culture’s transition from analog to digital. He co-founded Apple Computer. He led the team that revolutionized personal computing with the first Macintosh. As CEO of Apple, he led the development of the iPhone and later the iPad. You would think the children of such a man would be surrounded by technology. But Jobs and his wife Laureen didn’t let their children use iPads. Their home had few screens of any kind. Even though Jobs spent most of his time developing and selling Macs and iPhones and iPads, he was home with his wife and children for dinner when he was in town. The family ate together at a simple wooden table in their kitchen — and there were no digital devices or focus on popular culture. Instead, he’s said to have guided his family toward deep discussions of art, philosophy and education — with no iPads to be found. If the man who guided the development of such products chose a different path for his own children, does that suggest that his digital experience taught him that children need human connection, not screens? And does it suggest the possibility that we might be better off if we made the same choice for our families?

For four years, Donald Trump’s supporters screamed that everything that went wrong was the fault of Joe Biden. They were sometimes right and they were sometimes delusional. (Anybody who knows me understands that I can’t stand Biden any more than I can stand Trump, just for different reasons.) But for two months, Trump has rampaged through U.S. political life — vandalizing pretty much everything in sight — and the vast majority of his supporters are silent at best. Many watch as he blows up the world economy and they make excuses for him. They’re in absolute denial, even about things that Trump is doing very intentionally. Anybody who understands economics and history knows that tariffs are a terrible idea from a pragmatic point of view. Anybody who values individual freedom knows that tariffs are massive taxes on individuals — and they’re a tool of political control over the ability of people to trade freely. Trump is the antithesis of everything which political conservatives stood for just a few years ago. It’s far past time for people who claim to be conservatives to reclaim the principles and values which they used to claim — and stop this mad man before he can accelerate the day when we experience economic and social collapse. Open your eyes to reality and reject this lying narcissist.

On a live awards show Sunday night, one man made a joke about a female celebrity. The husband of the celebrity was offended and hit the man who made the joke. Or maybe it was staged for entertainment. Who knows? Who cares? Social media is full of discussion — and even arguments — about this idiocy today. This baffles me. Let’s assume for a moment that the event happened as reported. People have been having such idiotic fights ever since there have been humans. Half the bars in the world see such brief dustups regularly. It simply doesn’t matter. The fact that so many people believe they need to talk about this — or even need to have opinions about it — is more evidence of the bizarre media brainwashing that convinces many to care passionately about brain-dead trivia. Your life will be happier and saner if you focus on yourself, your family and your friends, not on whatever scripted (or spontaneous) bilge that the media wants to pipe into your home.

I’m in the middle of migrating this website to new servers this week. This means you might encounter some unexpected behavior until I get all the bugs worked out. Clicking on my links (including this one) might cause your browser to give you the message that it’s a site without a current security certificate. It’s not actually unsafe, but there’s something which isn’t yet set up for the security certificate. I apologize for any such errors you might encounter while the process is going on. If you notice any problems with content which didn’t migrate properly, I would appreciate you letting me know the details at davidmcelroy@mac.com. Thanks for your patience.

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