I ran into a friend Monday afternoon who I hadn’t seen for awhile. I knew he had gotten married about 18 months or so ago, but I hadn’t heard any news of him since. He had some news for me. He and his wife had a baby boy a few months back, so he’s a father now.
I was happy for my friend, but I was also envious — because having my own family is something I’m really eager for. I’ve always known that I wanted children, and I want them even more as the years pass.
I’m glad I didn’t have kids when I was much younger, because I’m not sure I’d adequately dealt with my own childhood baggage to be a good parent. I fear that I might have left them just as damaged as I’d felt if I’d taken on the responsibility years ago. I feel ready now, but I’m under the impression that convincing the right woman to be the mother is a key prerequisite.
As I thought about all this again, I wondered — not for the first time — why human beings seem so driven to have families. Having children isn’t logical. They cost us money. There’s rarely a “return on investment” in the pragmatic sense. So why do most of us feel so driven to create families?

‘You cannot love in moderation’; lukewarm love’s worse than none
What if our craving for dopamine drives our desires and addictions?
Was he angry to lose his family? Or because he lost his control?
Are you living the life you wanted when everything seemed possible?
The love I crave seems beyond horizon, always out of my reach
It’s odd how ‘choice’ can mean ‘no choice’ with the state involved
Moral priorities: ‘If we free the slaves, who will pick the cotton?’
I’d forgotten what I said about her necklace, but she hadn’t forgotten
Until I can have the family I need, I’ll spend my Thanksgiving alone