I have trouble giving up on people.
It’s not just people, though. It’s more accurate to say I have trouble giving up on whatever fantasy of the future that I’ve created in my mind. Sometimes that involves people. Sometimes it’s an achievement I’ve set my heart on. It can be any fantasy of what I think my life is going to look like.
I fall in love with my fantasies, I suppose. My life will be perfect when I make this thing happen. Everything will be perfect when this woman loves me and we live happily ever after.
And when I figure out that I’ve been chasing the wrong thing, I have trouble letting go of it. I have trouble saying that this thing is never going to happen. It’s hard for me to admit that maybe the thing I’ve been chasing was never good for me anyway.
When I stubbornly cling to dreams that are already dead, I sometimes allow myself to miss better opportunities. I sometimes mope so much about what I can’t have — even something I’ve decided isn’t good for me — that I miss better choices.
It’s been very difficult for me to stop watering dead flowers.

You must walk away from past before you open door to future
Why am I disappointed in others, when my secret sins lay hidden?
Find the partner who needs you; don’t be someone’s backup plan
What if most money spent for university degrees is useless?
When it comes to politics and race, double standards are everywhere
I’m trying to silence inner critic who says I ought to be perfect
Serenity is seeing all sides of life, choosing to continue the journey
Does mainstream schooling model bring out the worst in teen-agers?