The instructor was leading the class through exercises designed to produce a set of individual goals and plans. It was Thursday morning and I was attending mandatory post-license training for new real estate agents in Birmingham.
“What do you want?” she said again. “Write it in a specific way. Do you want to be rookie of the year? Imagine yourself accepting that award. Do you want to hit a certain financial goal? Be specific.”
I started typing. I named a couple of goals. They seemed to be the sorts of things other people around me were excited about.
And then it hit me. I didn’t want the things I had just written down. I was in a group of about 20 people, most of whom seemed to want those things, so it was easy to fall into accepting their goals as obvious and right.

Only certainty of life is that every one of us crosses River Styx alone
Heart that truly loves is a servant for another’s happiness and peace
We who believe life has meaning have lost war for modern culture
What do you do when it feels as though your entire world is over?
Who needs due process? Kangaroo court gets power to kill citizens
We’re all prisoners of a culture which demands that we conform
Shame almost got me fired — and shame still haunts me years later
We’re all going to die, but what do you want to do before you die?
Rights or choices? It might be time to re-frame the debate