I got a work-related email Thursday that made my stomach churn. It was from a client asking me about an issue I’d managed to avoid to avoid talking with him about. I knew he wouldn’t be happy with a decision I’d made related to his account — and I dreaded the day when I would have to deal with it. That day had come.
For a few minutes, I stewed in my unhappiness. I worried about how I was going to handle it. And then something finally clicked in my brain. I forced myself to ask the question I needed to ask.
“What is it that I need to learn from this?”
It sounds ridiculously naive, but for the last few years, that one question has saved me from a lot of grief. It doesn’t protect me from my own mistakes, but it puts me in the right frame of mind to deal with problems. But this isn’t some technique I learned from a book.
It’s something I learned from the experience of a woman who says she died briefly and visited heaven. It might sound crazy, but it’s been useful for me.

Why am I disappointed in others, when my secret sins lay hidden?
World has become a freak show, but we’re not supposed to notice
French president wants to ban homework as unfair to poor kids
‘Run away with me?’ I couldn’t accept her offer, but I wanted to
Forces shaping America reward acting like angry sixth graders
If he cheats at Cracker Barrel, he’ll eventually cheat you, too
Briefly: Media ignorant of religion because they’re not religious
Briefly: Study says kindness matters more than compatibility in relationships
Briefly: People remember how you treat them — and they can pay you back