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David McElroy

making sense of a dysfunctional culture

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How do we sometimes know things which we have no way of knowing?

By David McElroy · January 8, 2019

When I was in college, I knew someone who was going through a difficult academic semester. Finals were just starting, but she told me she had a terrible feeling something was wrong at home.

She called home — hundreds of miles away — to check on everything. Her mother assured her that everything was fine and told her to just concentrate on her finals. She went back to studying, but she couldn’t shake the feeling of dread that something terrible had happened.

She finally got through with finals and called home. She found that her family had decided to hide something from her. A grandmother who she had been very close to had died — right about the time she first started experiencing the apprehensive feeling that wouldn’t leave her alone. The family had decided not to tell her until finals were over — so as not to academically sidetrack the first person in her family to go to college.

The woman was convinced that she somehow knew something was wrong, even if she never could put her finger on it. I’ve experienced this oddness in my own life. For the second time in the last week, I’ve experienced one of those inexplicable feelings today — and I have no idea what I’m sensing.

I’m rational enough that there’s a part of me that wants to ignore such feelings. I certainly can’t prove they mean anything. I’ve tried talking myself into believing the things I’ve experienced have been coincidence, but something in my gut tells me that’s not true.

So I’m left in the odd position of believing something with firm conviction which I don’t really want to believe. I’m left believing that we have ways of communicating with each other — that our mind or spirit or something inside us somehow knows how to access information that doesn’t come through the five senses which we understand.

Late last Tuesday night — actually very early Wednesday morning — I started feeling something peculiar. It was hard to pinpoint when it started, but I suddenly knew it was there. I had no way to know what it was about or what I was feeling. I felt the strong need to talk about it or to start checking on people I cared about — to see if something traumatic or troubling was happening to them.

In my gut, I know there was something going on with someone — but it has more to do with pure instinct than with reason.

Every now and then in my life, I get an odd sensation that there’s something going on somewhere — right at that moment — which is going to affect my life in a major way or which is affecting the life of someone close to me. I can’t explain it and I certainly can’t provide any evidence that it means anything, but I’ve come to trust this odd sensation.

It’s a nervous feeling — which could be about something good or bad — but it feels as though something is going on in someone else’s mind or in a conversation or an argument or some other action which will end up having a huge impact on me. Rationally, I can’t say it’s anything other than an odd intuitive feeling. But something in my gut says it’s important.

When I woke up the next morning, the feeling was gone. Since these feelings rarely happen — every two or three years, I guess — I didn’t think I’d feel it again soon.

But I woke up this morning knowing that something was wrong. Again. I can’t say what it is. I can’t say for certain who it even involves. I just knew there was a strong apprehension in me — like the sort of nervous energy that makes me want to drop everything and go fix something that’s wrong or help someone or…

That’s just the thing. I don’t know what it means or what I should do. It feels as though there’s an emergency and I want to spring into action, but there’s nothing to do — since I don’t know anything specific to do.

It’s maddening.

Some people think anything that smacks of non-rational thinking ought to be shut down as ridiculous. Those people might be right. But there are a lot more people who will quietly admit that they, too, believe they sometimes know things — even if they don’t want to admit this to people who might laugh at them.

I don’t know why I’m feeling this. I just know that every gut feeling in my body says something is going on that I should know about — something which I have no way of rationally knowing.

How do we know such things? I have no idea. I don’t even have a theory. But I’ve experienced enough — in my own life and in the lives of others — to be certain there’s something to it.

I just wish I could look clearly into some crystal ball and see what’s happening — something my spirit knows but which my rational mind doesn’t — and find out whether there’s someone I need to send love and help to.

Maybe I’m crazy, but I believe in certain things I can’t see and can’t explain. There are some things which we just know — and I’m human enough to be frustrated that I can’t know what I’m seeing.

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As I was almost home — from a very long work day As I was almost home — from a very long work day — I saw this gorgeous sunset over Cedar Grove Baptist Church in Leeds, just a mile or so from my house. #nature #naturephotography #sky #colorful #clouds #sunset #birmingham #alabama
There wasn’t much of a sunset to the west tonigh There wasn’t much of a sunset to the west tonight, but the reflected pastels to the east were beautiful. #nature #naturephotography #sky #colorful #clouds #sunset #birmingham #alabama
It was too cloudy last night for me to take a phot It was too cloudy last night for me to take a photo of the lunar eclipse, so I missed the beautiful red image that I saw from others. But the sky overhead tonight is crystal clear — and the moon seemed especially bright — so I snapped a shot anyway. I don’t really have the right lens for this since I have to blow it up massively when I shoot at 240mm. Surprisingly, this image was made at 1/250th of a second at f/6.3 and ISO 250. I’d like to have a longer lens for such a shot, but it’s not worth the money since I’d rarely use it. #nature #naturephotography #sky #moon
The aftermath of sunset looked soft and pastel Tue The aftermath of sunset looked soft and pastel Tuesday evening. #nature #naturephotography #sky #colorful #clouds #sunset #birmingham #alabama
I didn’t have my “real camera” with me, but I didn’t have my “real camera” with me, but the iPhone gives you a sense of how colorful the sky was just a moment ago right before the sun slipped beneath the horizon. #nature #naturephotography #sky #colorful #clouds #sunset #birmingham #alabama
The Saturday evening sunset punches through the he The Saturday evening sunset punches through the heavy clouds sitting just over the horizon, just enough to create a spectacular orange show as the world spins toward another night of darkness. #nature #naturephotography #sky #colorful #clouds #sunset #birmingham #alabama
This was sunset just east of Birmingham Wednesday This was sunset just east of Birmingham Wednesday evening behind the restaurant where I had dinner. #nature #naturephotography #sky #colorful #clouds #sunset #birmingham #alabama
One of the best things about this time of year is One of the best things about this time of year is that I see far more sunsets since they occur later in the evening. #nature #naturephotography #sky #colorful #clouds #sunset #birmingham #alabama
I caught just the very end of sunset through the t I caught just the very end of sunset through the trees behind the restaurant where I’m eating Tuesday evening. #nature #naturephotography #sky #colorful #clouds #sunset #birmingham #alabama
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For “throwback Thursday, let me introduce you to For “throwback Thursday, let me introduce you to Sam. In 2009, I took in a young feral cat who I named for the early American revolutionary Samuel Adams. He was one of the most confident — downright arrogant, in fact — cats I’ve ever been around. He had an amazing personality and I immediately loved him. He was no more than 8 or 9 months old when he suddenly died for reasons that my vet couldn’t explain. Even though I had him only a short time, he was one of my all-time favorites. #tbt #cats #tabby #feral #birmingham #alabama
I’ve never been as curious about what a cat migh I’ve never been as curious about what a cat might be thinking as I constantly am about Merlin. As I watch him sitting here on the edge of my desk late Wednesday night, I can’t help but conclude he’s a very deep thinker. #cat #cats #catstagram #catsofinstagram #cute #cutecat #pets #petstagram #petsofinstagram #merlin2024 #instacat #ilovecats #birmingham #alabama
Lucy has been happily rolling around in the freshl Lucy has been happily rolling around in the freshly cut grass of the back yard Wednesday evening. #dog #dogs #dogstagram #dogsofinstagram #cute #cutedog #pets #petstagram #petsofinstagram #instadog #ilovedogs #birmingham #alabama
Thomas believes that he is the Most Interesting Ca Thomas believes that he is the Most Interesting Cat in the World — and I can’t say he’s wrong tonight. #cat #cats #catstagram #catsofinstagram #cute #cutecat #pets #petstagram #petsofinstagram #tabby #tabbycat #instacat #ilovecats #birmingham #alabama
Merlin is ready for me to turn the last of the off Merlin is ready for me to turn the last of the office lights off so he and Thomas can sleep peacefully without me muttering to myself as I write. #cat #cats #catstagram #catsofinstagram #cute #cutecat #pets #petstagram #petsofinstagram #merlin2024 #instacat #ilovecats #birmingham #alabama
Lucy just finished a Neighborhood Watch patrol and Lucy just finished a Neighborhood Watch patrol and now she’s cooling off in the back yard before heading inside for dinner. Her work is never done. #dog #dogs #dogstagram #dogsofinstagram #cute #cutedog #pets #petstagram #petsofinstagram #instadog #ilovedogs #birmingham #alabama
Except when he’s asleep, Thomas always looks as Except when he’s asleep, Thomas always looks as though he’s on high alert and ready to run away from danger. His feral early years still dominate his internal programming. #cat #cats #catstagram #catsofinstagram #cute #cutecat #pets #petstagram #petsofinstagram #tabby #tabbycat #instacat #ilovecats #birmingham #alabama
Lucy just finished her last walk of the day, but s Lucy just finished her last walk of the day, but she still wants more attention. She’s sitting in front of me looking expectantly. She seems certain that we will go outside for one more adventure if she’s persistent enough. #dog #dogs #dogstagram #dogsofinstagram #cute #cutedog #pets #petstagram #petsofinstagram #instadog #ilovedogs #birmingham #alabama
My favorite photos of Merlin tend to be those — My favorite photos of Merlin tend to be those — such as this one — in which he seems to be contemplating difficult issues. Feline philosophy or quantum physics or something else that he figures I wouldn’t understand. #cat #cats #catstagram #catsofinstagram #cute #cutecat #pets #petstagram #petsofinstagram #merlin2024 #instacat #ilovecats #birmingham #alabama #caturday
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On a live awards show Sunday night, one man made a joke about a female celebrity. The husband of the celebrity was offended and hit the man who made the joke. Or maybe it was staged for entertainment. Who knows? Who cares? Social media is full of discussion — and even arguments — about this idiocy today. This baffles me. Let’s assume for a moment that the event happened as reported. People have been having such idiotic fights ever since there have been humans. Half the bars in the world see such brief dustups regularly. It simply doesn’t matter. The fact that so many people believe they need to talk about this — or even need to have opinions about it — is more evidence of the bizarre media brainwashing that convinces many to care passionately about brain-dead trivia. Your life will be happier and saner if you focus on yourself, your family and your friends, not on whatever scripted (or spontaneous) bilge that the media wants to pipe into your home.

I’m in the middle of migrating this website to new servers this week. This means you might encounter some unexpected behavior until I get all the bugs worked out. Clicking on my links (including this one) might cause your browser to give you the message that it’s a site without a current security certificate. It’s not actually unsafe, but there’s something which isn’t yet set up for the security certificate. I apologize for any such errors you might encounter while the process is going on. If you notice any problems with content which didn’t migrate properly, I would appreciate you letting me know the details at davidmcelroy@mac.com. Thanks for your patience.

I often wonder what animals think when they look at us and consider the society we’ve created. Yes, I know this is fanciful and unrealistic, but what if they could? Would they be astounded at how we treat each other? Would they be disgusted by the ugliness and pettiness which fill so many of our daily interactions? The truth is that I’m feeling pretty disgusted with humanity tonight. I made the mistake of reading some online interactions that I should have avoided — and it sickened me. The people involved appeared to be vile and stupid and arrogant. I wish I could pretend they’re a tiny minority, but I know better. It’s times such as this when I most need to escape much of “civilization” and disconnect from their world. If humans are going to be worthy of “ruling this planet,” we have a lot of growth to do. And I fear that growth is nowhere in sight. So my buddy Thomas, above, and all of his friends would be right to judge us harshly — and to think, “Why do you folks get to be in charge?”

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Have you ever had what you thought was a new idea — and then discovered that “old you” had the same idea years ago? I had that experience tonight. And it’s been wonderful. I came up with an idea tonight for a very short satirical film that would be a promotion for a fictitious college. The point is to make the college promote — as good things — everything which is actually terrible about most modern colleges. Then I remembered a fake college that I invented back when I was in college. I had created student recruitment brochures and various newsletters back then, so I decided to call my “new” college by the same name I’d invented years ago: Ochita College. As I searched my computer for any old material I might still have about Ochita from the past, I discovered an email I sent to someone in 2009 — outlining essentially the same idea which I came up with tonight. Since I didn’t remember writing that, it felt like magic. So my next film project just might be this one instead. If all goes well, you might soon see “Ochita College: Your Future Starts Here.” This should be fun.

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