Love & Hope — Episode 7:
Will you be my Valentine?

By David McElroy · February 12, 2020

I have horribly mixed feelings about Valentine’s Day. I grew up being told that it’s a very artificial holiday made up by companies that want to sell you something. That still makes sense to my head, but my heart strongly identifies with the things we associate with the day.

In a lot of ways, that head vs. heart struggle perfectly captures all of my lifelong struggles with loving and being loved.

Preview of new week’s show: It was about 16 years ago when I got an unexpected first-hand lesson in how motivation really works. I had wanted to make a film for something like 20 years, but I kept finding every excuse in the book not to overcome my fears. And then I met a woman who was impressed that I was going to make a film. I wanted her to love me — and I was shooting my film less than 90 days later.

Next week, we’re going to talk about how love can motivate us to do things we didn’t know we could do.

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I constantly run across articles I’ve written at different times over the last nine years which I now wish I’d never published. It’s not always even a matter of disagreeing what what I wrote at the time. Sometimes I just wish I had been kinder in the way I approached something. Other times, it seems as though I wasted my time by writing about something that seems trivial. And yet other times, it’s that I don’t entirely agree with what I said then. I have the strange notion that everything I’ve ever said should somehow reflect the person I am today. That’s not possible, because I’m not the same person I was five years ago or 10 years ago. I like to think I’ve grown. So I guess I’ll continue to cringe at some things I’ve written. I hope I’ll keep growing — enough that I’ll cringe in 10 years at things I write or say today.

Few things make me as happy as receiving email from readers or listeners to tell me that something I’ve done has been useful to them. I’ve been very happy and humbled to receive a number of strongly positive messages in the last couple of weeks about my first three podcast episodes. So far, though, this one which I received about today’s episode is my favorite: “I wanted to let you know your podcasts are healing. I’ve had Lyme disease for a few years and yesterday I was diagnosed with major depression. Your story about your Dad is going to help me at counseling tomorrow. Thank you.” It’s not often that we know when we influence others, so I really appreciate those of you who have taken the time to tell me such things. I hope that something I say can matter to you. I appreciate every one of you.

Top-down government efforts to push children into academics they’re not ready for are hurting everybody. According to experienced kindergarten teachers, children in kindergarten today are unhappier than ever — and more teachers are quitting than ever — all because government bureaucrats are dictating that play be set aside in favor of academics that kids aren’t ready for. According to psychologists, the academic benefits are very short-term, but the emotional damage being done to children is long-term and serious. I have no idea why so many well-meaning parents still trust their children to be raised and educated by government bureaucrats, no matter how much they might like some of the teachers involved. The system is broken and is failing students.

One of my favorite Christmas traditions is watching “How the Grinch Stole Christmas.” The 1966 animated version is the only one I recognize as faithful to the wonderful original book by Dr. Seuss, so don’t even mention the newer ones to me. If you’d like to watch this classic with me tonight, here’s a copy you can view online or download, but the link will be live only for tonight. (No longer live. Sorry.) I hope you enjoy it as much as I do and I also hope it makes you as happy as it makes me. If you hear someone singing along to the songs — quite badly, most likely — that will be me.

I’m in a McDonald’s restaurant and a man just came in to apologize to a manager for having been rude to her when they had a minor dispute a couple of hours ago. He said he had started thinking about it and was ashamed of the way he acted. So he wanted to let her know that he shouldn’t have spoken to her as he did. She accepted his apology and apologized again to him for the mistake that had been made with his order. They both seemed more at peace after the brief conversation. I really appreciate people who are willing to take responsibility for not meeting their own standards. That can take courage. It’s a lesson most of us need to keep in mind — and that definitely includes me.

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