I have trouble giving up on people.
It’s not just people, though. It’s more accurate to say I have trouble giving up on whatever fantasy of the future that I’ve created in my mind. Sometimes that involves people. Sometimes it’s an achievement I’ve set my heart on. It can be any fantasy of what I think my life is going to look like.
I fall in love with my fantasies, I suppose. My life will be perfect when I make this thing happen. Everything will be perfect when this woman loves me and we live happily ever after.
And when I figure out that I’ve been chasing the wrong thing, I have trouble letting go of it. I have trouble saying that this thing is never going to happen. It’s hard for me to admit that maybe the thing I’ve been chasing was never good for me anyway.
When I stubbornly cling to dreams that are already dead, I sometimes allow myself to miss better opportunities. I sometimes mope so much about what I can’t have — even something I’ve decided isn’t good for me — that I miss better choices.
It’s been very difficult for me to stop watering dead flowers.

Private property ownership is just an illusion in this country today
What if our best romantic decisions come by listening to ‘selfish genes’?
Little boy for whom I was named shows what my mother hoped for
Is Paul Krugman serious or is this some kind of weird performance art?
If terrorists ‘hate us for our freedom,’ U.S. politicians are their best allies
Quit thinking about ‘jobs’; Think about what value you can provide
Would you secretly kill someone to get what you want the most?
There’s hatred, evil and injustice, but this is the ‘real’ America, too
Almost all of us feel alienation if we don’t find a place to call home