David McElroy

When I was younger, I had a number of quick ways to spot women who were potential romantic matches for me. Of all the things on my list, though, perhaps none was more obvious than a love of reading.

Women who are obsessed with books — especially what I consider good books — have always made me weak at the knees. They tend to be smart, insightful and deep, especially if they’re reading books of substance instead of simply infantile pulp all the time. There’s something about a woman like this that attracts me like few things can. Yes, a beautiful face is a alluring, but a beautiful face without a beautiful mind is ultimately a bore. I’ve found no quicker guide to finding a beautiful mind that watching whether she reads.

I ran across this essay about dating a woman who reads earlier today, and I beg you to read it if you have any understanding of what I’ve meant so far. For me, it was very emotional. One particular woman’s name seemed to be written all over the page for me. You will probably see someone else from your own life. Maybe it will make you cry, too.

And when you’re finished with that, listen to this song. It’s advice for the man who needs to “learn important things.”

A friend of mine died unexpectedly last year, but it wasn’t an accident or bad health. Following a painful business failure, my friend took his own life.

Because this wasn’t a friend who was in my life every single day, I’ve gone on with my life and his memory doesn’t come up frequently anymore. Two things have happened in the last couple of days to make me think of him.

First, I happened to mention his death to someone a couple of nights ago, someone who I’d introduced him to several years ago. She hadn’t had any more contact with him since that one time, but it was still upsetting to her to hear that he had killed himself.

Second, I was going through the address book on my computer Tuesday morning when I came upon his name and old contact information. It was like an odd digital ghost in black and white as I stared at his name. I thought I should delete the card, but I didn’t.

So what do these reactions suggest about our attitudes toward death and suicide? I’m not entirely sure, but I have an idea. When the names or circumstances of people who have died come up, we tend to think that our feelings are about them — remembering who they are and what they meant to us. I’m not so sure that’s usually the case. I suspect our reactions have more to do with the way we feel about our own lives.

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It would be hard to accuse me of being a Luddite about digital technology. I know of few people who are as tied to their technology as I am. I’m always connected, whether it’s with my iMac, iPhone or iPad. Despite being a big believer in the power of technology, though, I’m hesitant about digital textbooks — but I’m not sure why.

Printed textbooks seem destined to go the way of the dodo. Lately, I’ve been reading a lot about how iPads are sweeping schools and displacing books. I love my iPad, so I can see how it’s capable of that. I’m just not certain it’s the right medium for learning.

An iPad running a textbook app with hyperlinks and all sorts of learning aids might be great for improving education. I’m not saying I’m definitely against them. I just know I’m uncomfortable about switching away from books.

I have the Bible on my iPad and I use it for quick reference and for following along during worship services, yet when I’m ready to do more serious study, I still find myself reaching for a paper copy of the Bible. Why? I find that I can flip around and make connections in the paper copy far more quickly than I can on the iPad version. Yes, the iPad version has hyperlinks and a search engine, but if I’m reading something in Mark and I want to compare it to something in Matthew, my fingers “know” where to go quickly and I get there far more rapidly than I could if I had to use the digital way.

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