When I was young, I wanted to be great. I wanted to be important, successful and powerful. I wanted to be put onto a pedestal, where I could get the adulation and approval I craved.
I wouldn’t have put it that way then, of course. I just thought I wanted the things my culture presented as normal goals for someone like me. (I understand now the degree to which being raised by a narcissistic father left me craving approval and attention.)
As I’ve gotten more emotionally healthy and psychologically mature, I’ve been surprised to find out that my desires in life have changed. It’s not that I’ve “given up.” It’s not that I’m settling for something easy after failing to achieve things I wanted.
My desires today are healthier and far more likely to make me happy. You see, I want to be ordinary. I want to be a good man. I want to be kind and loving and content with the joy of living an ordinary human life.
But I’ve recently discovered a fascinating paradox. As an ordinary man, I won’t have the things this world and our culture have always promised me. I won’t have wealth or power or adulation. But it turns out that the people who gain what the world and our culture promise won’t have what I have.
They won’t have the peace and contentment and joy of a man who’s living a simple and ordinary life.

If there’s something you must do, income and vocation might clash
I’m still the kid who might burn your clubhouse if you cross me
Walls built to protect heart keep others from giving what we need
Collectivists think they’re doing us favors as they force herd to follow
Christmas looks different now, but I still see joy with eyes of a child
How can we be lonely while we’re surrounded by billions of people?
Why is it so hard to make good art? It’s something I’ll never understand
It’s a very old cliche, but it’s true: Denial isn’t just a river in Egypt
Looking for truth in random noise? Or is there meaning for me in this?