• Skip to primary navigation
  • Skip to main content
  • Skip to primary sidebar
  • Skip to secondary sidebar

David McElroy

making sense of a dysfunctional culture

  • About David
  • New here?
  • Reading
  • Video

David McElroy

In cold and dehumanized culture, many yearn to feel human again

By David McElroy · February 28, 2022

The hand-painted letters on the side of a van seemed to scream like an outraged shout. I was just east of Birmingham Monday afternoon — heading east on I-20 — when I saw the words.

“I AM A HUMAN BEING.”

That’s all it said. There appeared to be a young white man driving. The van had out-of-state license plates. There was no other clue about what the words meant. But, somehow, it made sense to me. I like to imagine that I know how the man inside felt.

A human being is naturally free. He doesn’t live with shackles on his hands and feet, but he also doesn’t allow shackles on his mind. He doesn’t live in a cage with bars and a lock on the outside. But neither does he allow his mind to be caged and controlled.

We don’t enslave people’s bodies anymore. The chains and shackles are mostly in museums. But we’ve done something far worse. We’ve given up control of our minds. We’ve turned over control to bullies and politicians and advertisers and carnival barkers.

And even though our bodies wander the world freely, this control of our minds leaves us doing and saying and being what someone else wants us to be. But every now and then, one of us wakes up to the reality of the culture we’ve created. And even before we fully understand what’s going on, something inside cries out.

I am a human being! I have a right to be free!

Keep Reading

Related Posts

  • I don’t claim to know the solution, but the modern church has failed
  • If you don’t feel overwhelmed, you just aren’t paying attention
  • Narcissistic abuse often leaves victims feeling alone in the world

Filed Under: Uncategorized

Modern weddings seem designed to conceal reality of relationships

By David McElroy · February 26, 2022

I hate weddings, so I’m not sure why I agreed to go to one Saturday afternoon. But Kristen had invited me to go with her to several events in recent months and I’d declined them all. On a whim, I accepted this invitation, even though I wouldn’t know a soul there except my date.

The small country church was overflowing with a couple hundred people. I’d never been to this small rural community. I felt like an anthropologist trying to quietly disappear into the crowd of a tribe he was studying. But were they the aliens? Or was that me?

While we were on the way to the church, Kristen told me the couple’s story. The bride has never been married but has a 5-year-old daughter. The groom is the only son in a family that owns a couple of auto parts stores. The bride claims the pair had been dating “off and on” for awhile. The groom says it was just casual sex every now and then, but she got pregnant.

Angry parents were soon involved. The groom’s family insisted on an abortion. The bride’s family demanded a wedding. There were threats made all around. And now a semi-fancy wedding had been thrown together in just weeks.

I knew all of that going in — and Kristen told me everybody knew — but what I was about to see was a theatrical performance that defied all reality.

Keep Reading

Related Posts

  • Encounter with friend reminds me: Self-improvement is path to change
  • Group conflict isn’t as simple as tales of good guys vs. bad guys
  • In the old Ginger or Mary Ann debate, I wanted a third choice

Filed Under: Uncategorized

Sharing mundane details of life is underrated joy of loving someone

By David McElroy · February 25, 2022

I had just left work Friday afternoon when I noticed clouds gathering to the west. The sun was about 20 minutes from sinking beneath the horizon, so I thought there might be a good sunset. I made a detour to the top of Shades Mountain and found a perfect spot from which to watch a glorious sunset.

Afterwards, I went straight to dinner. I looked through my photos and picked the one I liked best. As I sat there looking at a full-screen copy of the shot, I wanted to share it with someone. It wasn’t out of pride about my work. The desire came from excitement about the beauty of what I’d just experienced.

And there was nobody who I wanted to share with. That made me feel very much alone.

In that moment, I realized in a painful way how much I miss having a partner with whom to share the routine details of daily life. I miss having someone who wants to hear what happened in my day — and I miss listening to the mundane thoughts and experiences of a woman I love.

If you don’t love someone, listening to such things is a chore. If you do love someone, it’s a privilege.

Keep Reading

Related Posts

  • It’s hard to shut off our internal chatterboxes to listen to silence
  • Spoiled brat sues White Castle because he can’t fit into a booth
  • For good or bad, we default back to what feels most familiar to us

Filed Under: Uncategorized

  • ⪡
  • Page 1
  • Interim pages omitted …
  • Page 77
  • Page 78
  • Page 79
  • Page 80
  • Page 81
  • Interim pages omitted …
  • Page 775
  • ⪢

Primary Sidebar

Subscribe

Enter your address to receive notifications by email every time new articles are posted. Then click “Subscribe.”

Contact David

David likes email, but can’t reply to every message. I get a surprisingly large number of requests for relationship advice — seriously — but time doesn’t permit a response to all of them. (Sorry.)

Search

Archives

Donations

If you enjoy this site and want to help, click here. All donations are appreciated, no matter how large or small. (PayPal often doesn’t identify donors, so I might not be able to thank you directly.)




Future Photo Display

As part of my effort to rid my life of social media, I will no longer display links to my two Instagram accounts here. Those accounts will be dormant for the time being and will eventually be deleted. I plan to have a method for displaying photos here instead, but the solutions I’ve tested so far have been disappointing. I’m still working on it.

My Instagram

Sunset, Leeds, Alabama — August 27, 2026 Sunset, Leeds, Alabama — August 27, 2026
Sunset, Leeds, Alabama — August 19, 2026 Sunset, Leeds, Alabama — August 19, 2026
When I got home at midnight Monday, I was doing so When I got home at midnight Monday, I was doing some work in the studio and Oliver wanted to join me, so I showed him around to acclimate him to the place again. He rarely goes in there, but I have pictures of him in that studio on the night I brought him home as a kitten. 😺
Earlier this week, I found two photos of Lucy and Earlier this week, I found two photos of Lucy and me that I had never seen. I loved finding the pictures, but seeing these photos left me thinking about the effect it has on us when we lose an animal we love — and it was also a reminder of how much my life has changed for the last nine months it’s been since I lost her. I wrote an essay about this. You can find it as the most recent post at davidmcelroy.org right now if you’re interested. I really do miss this sweet girl.
When I take lightning pictures, I’m always hoping When I take lightning pictures, I’m always hoping to get just one usable photo, but I got two dramatic images tonight. You might recognize the water tower and communication tower that you’ve seen in many of my sunset photos. This is about a mile from my house in Leeds, which is just east of Birmingham.
For those who are in places where it’s miserably h For those who are in places where it’s miserably hot today, here is a minute of light rain and gentle thunder from my back yard late Saturday afternoon. It’s very relaxing to stand at my back door and watch this, especially since the heat is pretty mild today — 80 degrees (about 26 celsius) — for July in the American South.
Alex was willing to cooperate with me for a new po Alex was willing to cooperate with me for a new portrait late Wednesday night. It’s been roughly three and a half years now since the cold night when I was able to lure him out from behind a garbage dumpster into a trap — but I don’t think he’s sorry at this point that he fell for the trick. 😺
This is the face of a man who’s thrilled that the This is the face of a man who’s thrilled that the weekend is finally here. It was a very long (and productive) week, but the time has finally come that I have time to write and read and think. Late Friday night, I’m at the McDonald’s near my house with a Diet Dr Pepper and a MacBook. For me, it’s like Cheers without the booze.
Donald Trump has figured out who to blame for the Donald Trump has figured out who to blame for the the D.C. Reflecting Pool turning green. The dastardly deed was carried out by a specially trained squad of Antifa cats trained by the Far Left. It’s not his fault. Arrest all the cats! #satire #parody
Follow on Instagram

Critter Instagram

From the CritterCam: Early Sunday afternoon, Sam w From the CritterCam: Early Sunday afternoon, Sam was asleep in the cat bad on my desk and Alex was sleeping on the desk next to him when some noise outside the side of the house caught their attention.
From the CritterCam: I’ve really been seeing Sam’s From the CritterCam: I’ve really been seeing Sam’s confidence grow lately and that makes me happy. The webcam caught this video tonight that shows Alex asleep in a cat bed on my desk when Sam decided he wanted the same bed. Sam got part of the way into the bed, waiting until Alex decided to strike back — and then he chased Alex out of the spot and went to sleep. This was originally about three minutes long, and I cut out the dead parts to make it slightly more than a minute. Sam has been totally intimidated of the other two for most of the last two years, so this is new.
The stray tuxedo cat is hanging out inside my hous The stray tuxedo cat is hanging out inside my house again Friday evening. My current plan is to take him to my vet Tuesday — after Labor Day Monday — and then start the process of acclimating him to my cats. Those three are not going to be happy campers, but it should end well eventually.
Alex is on his way home from the vet, where he had Alex is on his way home from the vet, where he had his annual shots. He didn’t like it any more than his brothers did Tuesday.
Late Tuesday night, Oliver is finally starting to Late Tuesday night, Oliver is finally starting to forgive me for taking him to the vet for his annual shots today.
At the vet’s office Tuesday, I met a sweet woman w At the vet’s office Tuesday, I met a sweet woman who recently rescued this tiny kitten. Her dog — who was also there for shots — seemed to love the kitten and was protective of her. (She named the kitten Dot after her late mother.) I loved watching the kitten crawl all over the woman. 😺
From the CritterCam: Since Alex didn’t make it on From the CritterCam: Since Alex didn’t make it on this trip to the vet, he’s at home by himself just hanging out on the cat bed on my desk.
The cats are getting their annual shots today and The cats are getting their annual shots today and Oliver isn’t happy about it. Actually, I could find only two carriers, so I brought Oliver and Sam on this trip. It’s going to be too late to make another trip today for Alex, so he’ll have to wait until tomorrow. I wanted to make sure they’re all up to date before I potentially bring the tuxedo cat inside for good.
The feral tuxedo cat is purring, but he’s still ne The feral tuxedo cat is purring, but he’s still nervous. He’s of two minds. He wants me to love on him, but he also wants to jump down and be unfettered — for a few seconds before he comes back to rub against my leg and demand attention again. He’s confused about what he wants. It sounds like some of my saying relationships.
Follow on Instagram

Secondary Sidebar

Briefly

It hasn’t happened yet, but there’s a possibility that I might be taking in a fourth feline. A couple of months ago, a cat-loving neighbor asked whether I’d seen a “tuxedo cat” hanging out in the neighborhood. I hadn’t, but this guy eventually wandered past my house a few weeks later — and we haven’t been able to find evidence that he has a home. I’ve been giving him water and food for the last week and he finally let me pet him two nights ago. He’s purred for me two nights in a row and he let me take a low-quality selfie with him Thursday night. Tonight, though, he let me pick him up and bring him inside to look around. This went surprisingly well, as you can see from this photo. I don’t know whether he’ll be joining the family, but I’m certain that Alex, Oliver and Sam would vote no, at least until they get to know him. I’m trying to make certain he doesn’t have a home, but if he does join us, what do you suppose his name will be?

It turns out that the radical far left has been training “Antifa cats” to sabotage anything important to Donald Trump. Everything he did was perfect. Honest. It was all the cats’ fault. Arrest all the cats! This is the latest of my ridiculous satirical shorts. Please go watch it. Then “like” it and subscribe. Please. I’m begging you. (Too much?) Although a couple of the previous videos have had views in the hundreds, most have still been seen by fewer than 20 people. So I seem to be having trouble letting people know that page exists.

Here’s the latest of my ridiculous parody shorts. It crossed my mind Tuesday to wonder what a slick and fast-talking car dealer might do right now to try to turn the high price of gasoline to his advantage. So I conceived of a fat and lovable character who tried to sell cars that don’t use any fuel — and then I started wondering if it would be funnier if all the characters were felines. Designing the King Cashpaw character took about four hours, but the rest took only another four hours, so this was a relatively quick piece that virtually wrote itself. I know it’s almost impossible for these parody videos to find a larger audience, but at least they amuse me — and there are 19 of them on my YouTube page now. The first few were very limited, but they’re getting more complex.

The Republican Party is dead. It still exists in name, of course, but it’s nothing but a shell. All that’s left are idiots and stooges and con men of the MAGA party. When Donald Trump is gone — which won’t be long — those populist idiots and pragmatic fools will have no one to follow. Democrats will thrive. They will take more power than ever and they will push the federal government further to the radical far left than ever. When that happens, don’t just blame Trump if you’re a conservative. Blame every person who has claimed to be a conservative and has given up on principles, character and everything else that Republicans once claimed to stand for. As someone who worked as a GOP political consultant for many years, this is disgusting and disturbing to me. Those who have enabled Trump to have almost unchecked power are going to be shocked when they see what they will unleash in the long run. It’s been plain all along what this narcissistic con man is. It’s your fault that you chose to pretend not to see what he really is.

We are ruled by the dumbest and most incompetent people among us — and we have a system which allows stupid and irresponsible people to force the costs of their idiocy onto smarter and wiser people. Can we get away with that? Yes, for quite some time. But we eventually reach a point at which the dumbest of the dumb — who are habitual liars and mentally ill fools — lead us to the disasters and destruction that some of us have seen coming for years. We are approaching that point. And yet most of the idiots around us still wave their rhetorical banners of support for the evil people who are leading us to ruin — and all of them point their fingers at someone else, never noticing that their own enthusiastic support of evil is to blame. When things finally fall apart, blame yourself for your blindness to the evil, not whoever happens to be in power when it happens.

Read More

Crass Capitalism

Before you buy anything from Amazon, please click on this link. I’ll get a tiny commission, but it won’t cost you a nickel extra. The cats will thank you. And so will I.

© 2011–2026 · All Rights Reserved
Built by: 1955 DESIGN