Friend’s happy family and career remind me how good life can be

By David McElroy · March 30, 2018

It makes my heart feel full of joy when my friends are happy. Seeing happiness in a friend reminds me that life in this world can be incredibly joyful — and I need that reminder sometimes.

I just saw a man who I rarely see anymore and I got an update on his life. When I first met Josh six or eight years ago, he was a young man working as an assistant manager at a fast food restaurant. By coincidence, I had known of his father — although his father was older than I was — when I was in high school about 45 miles from here.

Nearly five years ago, Josh married a beautiful and sweet woman and I was happy about that. He worked his way up to the top of management at a very successful restaurant. He was making a nice living, but he was working too many hours. I assumed he would stay on that path.

When I saw him tonight, I found out he had finished his college degree last spring. He had been in college off and on for years, so he didn’t even tell most people he was back in school until he finished his coursework.

He and his wife timed having a baby to come just after his graduation.

On the day his daughter was born, he got a call from a major bank asking him to apply for a job. Three months later, he was a retail banker with a prestigious bank, working at an upscale branch in a nice neighborhood.

The news was all good, but what really made my heart full was to sense just how content he is. He obviously loves his wife and baby daughter. (The little girl is adorable.) He’s happy to be in a job he likes that requires far less work — and it’s a job that gives him a career path he’s happy with.

I’ve been really down this week because I’m unhappy with some of the things life has been showing me lately. It’s easy for me to allow all of my unhappy circumstances to get me down — and it’s easy to wonder whether things can get better for me.

So it makes me happy to see Josh so full of joy and contentment. It makes my heart full to see my friend happy — and it’s encouraging to remind myself that life might still have joy and happiness to send my way, too. That might sound trite, but it’s true.

I’m happy for Josh — and I’m hopeful for the rest of us. Including me.

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I constantly run across articles I’ve written at different times over the last nine years which I now wish I’d never published. It’s not always even a matter of disagreeing what what I wrote at the time. Sometimes I just wish I had been kinder in the way I approached something. Other times, it seems as though I wasted my time by writing about something that seems trivial. And yet other times, it’s that I don’t entirely agree with what I said then. I have the strange notion that everything I’ve ever said should somehow reflect the person I am today. That’s not possible, because I’m not the same person I was five years ago or 10 years ago. I like to think I’ve grown. So I guess I’ll continue to cringe at some things I’ve written. I hope I’ll keep growing — enough that I’ll cringe in 10 years at things I write or say today.

Few things make me as happy as receiving email from readers or listeners to tell me that something I’ve done has been useful to them. I’ve been very happy and humbled to receive a number of strongly positive messages in the last couple of weeks about my first three podcast episodes. So far, though, this one which I received about today’s episode is my favorite: “I wanted to let you know your podcasts are healing. I’ve had Lyme disease for a few years and yesterday I was diagnosed with major depression. Your story about your Dad is going to help me at counseling tomorrow. Thank you.” It’s not often that we know when we influence others, so I really appreciate those of you who have taken the time to tell me such things. I hope that something I say can matter to you. I appreciate every one of you.

Top-down government efforts to push children into academics they’re not ready for are hurting everybody. According to experienced kindergarten teachers, children in kindergarten today are unhappier than ever — and more teachers are quitting than ever — all because government bureaucrats are dictating that play be set aside in favor of academics that kids aren’t ready for. According to psychologists, the academic benefits are very short-term, but the emotional damage being done to children is long-term and serious. I have no idea why so many well-meaning parents still trust their children to be raised and educated by government bureaucrats, no matter how much they might like some of the teachers involved. The system is broken and is failing students.

One of my favorite Christmas traditions is watching “How the Grinch Stole Christmas.” The 1966 animated version is the only one I recognize as faithful to the wonderful original book by Dr. Seuss, so don’t even mention the newer ones to me. If you’d like to watch this classic with me tonight, here’s a copy you can view online or download, but the link will be live only for tonight. (No longer live. Sorry.) I hope you enjoy it as much as I do and I also hope it makes you as happy as it makes me. If you hear someone singing along to the songs — quite badly, most likely — that will be me.

I’m in a McDonald’s restaurant and a man just came in to apologize to a manager for having been rude to her when they had a minor dispute a couple of hours ago. He said he had started thinking about it and was ashamed of the way he acted. So he wanted to let her know that he shouldn’t have spoken to her as he did. She accepted his apology and apologized again to him for the mistake that had been made with his order. They both seemed more at peace after the brief conversation. I really appreciate people who are willing to take responsibility for not meeting their own standards. That can take courage. It’s a lesson most of us need to keep in mind — and that definitely includes me.

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