My endorsement goes to the man who can make coercive state work

By David McElroy · November 13, 2011

Much to my surprise, people sometimes send me email to ask who I support for the Republican presidential nomination. I can only assume those people don’t read the site thoroughly, but I’m going to make an endorsement today — just for them.

What is it we want in a president? We want a person who will respect individual liberty across the board, someone who will end government intervention in the economy, someone who will pull U.S. troops back to our own states and use them only to defend that territory, and someone who will dismantle the social welfare state that has been built for the last 80 years or so. There are other details we want, but those are some broad strokes.

Taking the requirements of the job into account, I’m throwing my complete support behind that great, patriotic American named Mr. Nobody. That’s right. Without question, Nobody gets my endorsement.

Since Congress controls the laws that decide how much individual freedom we’re allowed to keep, the other candidates won’t respect our freedom. They can’t. They don’t make the laws. Nobody will respect our freedom.

Because Congress mandates that the executive branch control more and more aspects of our personal lives, the president isn’t allowed to decide to let the economy operate on its own. Obama can’t do that. Romney can’t do that. Not even Ron Paul can do that. Nobody can.

Because wars and the use of the military are so popular, Congress is going to insist that U.S. bases around the world continue to operate — inevitably angering someone in the countries where they’re located. Because building expensive weapons puts massive amounts of money into the pockets of the military-industrial complex — and employs a good number of people doing it — Congress will continue to buy that equipment. No president is going to be allowed to cut military spending. Obama doesn’t want to and couldn’t if he did. Romney and the leading Republican contenders are chomping at the bit already to invade Iran. They aren’t going to stop the foreign adventurism. Nobody can.

Since the programs of the “social safety net” (such as Social Security and Medicare) are so popular, Congress is going to continue to fund them. It’s not only going to continue funding them, but it’s going to pile on additional programs, no matter what the economic conditions are. Obama is dying to keep adding programs, so he’ll co-0perate in adding them. Romney and the other Republicans who have a chance of winning will give lip service to ending a few programs, but they don’t really want to end them. (Remember that Romney is the architect of RomneyCare in Massachusetts, which was the blueprint for ObamaCare.) None of the other candidates will end the social welfare state. Nobody can.

So now you know. The candidate to support is 2012 is Nobody. Let me spell it for you. That’s N-O-B-O-D-Y. If someone asks you who you’re for, just give them that one name and then realize that you’ve said all you need to say.

I’m voting for Nobody. I suggest you vote for Nobody. It’s the only pragmatic and moral choice.

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On a live awards show Sunday night, one man made a joke about a female celebrity. The husband of the celebrity was offended and hit the man who made the joke. Or maybe it was staged for entertainment. Who knows? Who cares? Social media is full of discussion — and even arguments — about this idiocy today. This baffles me. Let’s assume for a moment that the event happened as reported. People have been having such idiotic fights ever since there have been humans. Half the bars in the world see such brief dustups regularly. It simply doesn’t matter. The fact that so many people believe they need to talk about this — or even need to have opinions about it — is more evidence of the bizarre media brainwashing that convinces many to care passionately about brain-dead trivia. Your life will be happier and saner if you focus on yourself, your family and your friends, not on whatever scripted (or spontaneous) bilge that the media wants to pipe into your home.

I’m in the middle of migrating this website to new servers this week. This means you might encounter some unexpected behavior until I get all the bugs worked out. Clicking on my links (including this one) might cause your browser to give you the message that it’s a site without a current security certificate. It’s not actually unsafe, but there’s something which isn’t yet set up for the security certificate. I apologize for any such errors you might encounter while the process is going on. If you notice any problems with content which didn’t migrate properly, I would appreciate you letting me know the details at davidmcelroy@mac.com. Thanks for your patience.

I often wonder what animals think when they look at us and consider the society we’ve created. Yes, I know this is fanciful and unrealistic, but what if they could? Would they be astounded at how we treat each other? Would they be disgusted by the ugliness and pettiness which fill so many of our daily interactions? The truth is that I’m feeling pretty disgusted with humanity tonight. I made the mistake of reading some online interactions that I should have avoided — and it sickened me. The people involved appeared to be vile and stupid and arrogant. I wish I could pretend they’re a tiny minority, but I know better. It’s times such as this when I most need to escape much of “civilization” and disconnect from their world. If humans are going to be worthy of “ruling this planet,” we have a lot of growth to do. And I fear that growth is nowhere in sight. So my buddy Thomas, above, and all of his friends would be right to judge us harshly — and to think, “Why do you folks get to be in charge?”

I should have expected this, but I honestly didn’t. The article I wrote last week about disagreements over treatment for autistic children brought me angry emails. You could almost call it “hate mail.” Of the five emails about it so far, two have been to tell me that I’m wrong to even listen to critics of the most popular therapy for autistic children — and the other three tell me I’m wrong for not condemning the treatment as the “obvious” abuse it is. If you read the article, you know I didn’t take a position on the issue, because I simply don’t know enough to have an opinion. But by talking about the issue, I stepped into a heated controversy. The emails from the two sides convinced me of nothing. But they did give me even more empathy for the unfortunate parents who have to figure out for themselves where the truth lies for their children.

Have you ever had what you thought was a new idea — and then discovered that “old you” had the same idea years ago? I had that experience tonight. And it’s been wonderful. I came up with an idea tonight for a very short satirical film that would be a promotion for a fictitious college. The point is to make the college promote — as good things — everything which is actually terrible about most modern colleges. Then I remembered a fake college that I invented back when I was in college. I had created student recruitment brochures and various newsletters back then, so I decided to call my “new” college by the same name I’d invented years ago: Ochita College. As I searched my computer for any old material I might still have about Ochita from the past, I discovered an email I sent to someone in 2009 — outlining essentially the same idea which I came up with tonight. Since I didn’t remember writing that, it felt like magic. So my next film project just might be this one instead. If all goes well, you might soon see “Ochita College: Your Future Starts Here.” This should be fun.

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