“So who’s gonna watch you die?”
Fifteen years after I first heard that line in the chorus of a Death Cab for Cutie song, it remains one of the most devastating questions I’ve heard. It was a gut punch to me because I didn’t know the answer for myself — and I still don’t.
In the song, “What Sarah Said,” the singer recalls being in a hospital watching and waiting as a loved one dies. (You can listen to the song below.) He recounts all the sights and sounds and smells of the intensive care unit. Then he says what’s really on his mind:
But I’m thinking of what Sarah said:
“Love is watching someone die…”
I’ve been thinking about life and death even more than usual lately. I keep thinking that the real answer to the question — of who’s going to be there — is about mutual trust. So who do you trust — who also wants to trust you?

Was life planned before birth? What did you come here to learn?
To save my own sanity, it’s time for me to shut up about Trump
Finding joy brings more happiness than the empty pursuit of pleasure
Do five big beer companies force Native Americans to abuse alcohol?
I keep forgetting that I can’t save those who don’t want to be saved
Concerns about digital future leave me mourning analog past
What if a key to knowing what to do is built into everybody’s gut?
Hank Williams story reminds me I’ve always wanted to be a star
Insanity is part of being human – and we’re all potentially unstable