I was an ambitious teen-ager. I later became an ambitious adult.
I wanted power and material success, but more than anything else, I wanted approval. I wanted praise. I needed people to be impressed with what I did and with what I achieved.
By the time I was about 15 or 16 years old, I wanted to be president of the United States. That wasn’t just an idle daydream. I had a written plan for each step of the way. John F. Kennedy had become president at the age of 43. My goal was to beat that — to become president even younger.
In my 20s, I wanted to build a media empire. No matter where I worked in the newspaper business, my mind was looking ahead to the day when I would own a massive media conglomerate — newspapers, television, movies and more.
The truth is that I didn’t want any of these things. Although I enjoyed publishing newspapers, I didn’t want to run a big business. And I didn’t want to do the deals and fundraising that would get me somewhere powerful as a politician.
I just wanted praise. I wanted applause. My ego was begging for approval.

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Night of panic and little sleep shows chaos of finding my way
Goodbye, Thomas (2006?-2023)
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