It happened again this week. Like a never-ending nightmare, I made the same horrible choice I’ve made before — with the same results.
For most people, the idea that eating could be an addiction sounds silly. For those who have experienced the patterns I have, though, it’s something that can feel both inexplicable and inevitable.
It wasn’t until I had a political friend who was a recovering alcoholic that I realized the patterns I go through with food are very similar to what any addict experiences. That shocked me at the time and it’s led me to think and read quite a bit about it over the years. The knowledge and insight haven’t stopped me from doing things, though — more often than I’d like to admit — that I know are unhealthy for me.
It’s never about the food. It’s always about the feelings that the food can mask.

How can you have convictions while remaining open to truth?
Ethnic Indian wins Miss America? Who cares? Bigots seem upset
Like an alien, I move through a world I can see but never touch
She says she’ll always love me, but she didn’t say who she was
If you must be ‘good enough,’ you’ll never start to be yourself
Kitten outsmarted me for weeks, but Alex finally joined our family