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David McElroy

making sense of a dysfunctional culture

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We often value a love only after we’ve carelessly thrown it away

By David McElroy · April 2, 2022

“I have often thought of you,” said Estella. … “There was a long hard time when I kept far from me the remembrance of what I had thrown away when I was quite ignorant of its worth. But since my duty has not been incompatible with the admission of that remembrance, I have given it a place in my heart.”
— Charles Dickens, “Great Expectations”

About 12 years ago, I almost married a brilliant and beautiful woman. A month before we were to be married, though, I backed out. I broke her heart. And I eventually regretted it.

But by the time I realized I had made a mistake — maybe six months later — it was too late. I told her I had been wrong and begged her to take me back. But I had hurt her and she was already moving on. So she broke my heart.

Over time, each of us regretted throwing away the love we had had from the other. But our timing was off — and our regrets were at different times — so our lives went in very different directions.

I’ve been wondering lately how different our decisions about love would be if we knew what we faced in the future. How often do we carelessly reject love which we later would do anything to have again?

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VIDEO: Was it ridiculous that I had to learn good manners as a child?

By David McElroy · April 1, 2022

When I was young, I was taught how to interact with other people in almost every conceivable situation — and I was good at it.

When I got a little older, I started thinking that what we were all doing in this was was somehow dishonest, because none of us cared about the things we asked each other. But I’ve learned that these “ridiculous” interactions — these “social scripts,” as I call them — serve a very important function in human societies.

As I continue to explore producing video content, I’m making almost whatever comes to my mind, regardless of whether it fits with the overall theme that I’ve set. I’ll eventually focus more one a unified theme, but while I’m learning — and trying to get better at it — I’m making whatever lets me get some practice in front of the camera.

Tap of click the video below to hear more about whether it makes sense to force children to learn what we call manners.

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VIDEO: What does it mean to have someone waiting at home for you?

By David McElroy · March 24, 2022

I had a terrible day. A lot of things went wrong and I found myself wanting to get as far away from human beings as possible. I was frustrated and angry with everybody, it seemed.

But then I got home and found my porch light on and the lights on inside my office. For a moment, I believed someone was there waiting for me.

And for that brief moment, I was fully aware of how much I need people — and to have someone who really is at home for me.

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Here’s proof that reality and satire are indisting Here’s proof that reality and satire are indistinguishable these days.
This was the sunset I saw from the parking lot out This was the sunset I saw from the parking lot outside of the Walmart near my house just after the sun went down Friday evening.
This little parody was inspired by my trip to buy This little parody was inspired by my trip to buy gas a little while ago. Even at a no-name brand, the price was $4.09. If I remember correctly, it was $2.29 a gallon at the same station on the day the war started. I don’t know about you, but I’m tired of winning. 🤣
For the best and most sophisticated in lawn care, For the best and most sophisticated in lawn care, check out the sponsor of one of my upcoming YouTube video episodes. 🙃 #parody #threestooges
Have you felt as though you’re living through Grou Have you felt as though you’re living through Groundhog Day lately? Me, too. Here’s a quick-and-dirty political satire I made this evening for fun and stress relief.
About three minutes before sunrise, vibrant color About three minutes before sunrise, vibrant color is poking through the skies to the east of my back yard.
The lights and color might have been more spectacu The lights and color might have been more spectacular a couple of minutes before this, but this was the best view I had of the Monday afternoon sunset from a bridge over I-20 in Moody, Ala.
I just remembered this shot I got a couple of hour I just remembered this shot I got a couple of hours ago of the fading sunset while I was in the Publix parking lot on the way home. If you suddenly find yourself craving Arby’s or Wendy’s, blame the giant icons in the sky, not me. 😃 (BTW, this was with the iPhone’s 8X telephoto lens.) #nature #naturephotography #sunset #birmingham #alabama
I had just pulled into a parking lot Friday night I had just pulled into a parking lot Friday night and was watching traffic through the distortion of the gently falling rain on my car window when I realized that the abstract view I had matched the way I was feeling tonight, so I turned it into a brief abstract video to match my mood.
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Sam is taking the morning shift of Neighborhood Wa Sam is taking the morning shift of Neighborhood Watch today.
Oliver thinks it’s a remarkably nice morning for s Oliver thinks it’s a remarkably nice morning for some extra sleep.
It’s unusual for me to get all three of the cats i It’s unusual for me to get all three of the cats in the same shot. Although this is primarily showing Alex grooming Oliver, Sam is in the background taking a bath for a good portion of it.
Alex is in an office window at the front of the ho Alex is in an office window at the front of the house keeping an eye on the neighborhood Tuesday afternoon.
Oliver has been sleeping on the top level of the c Oliver has been sleeping on the top level of the castle all morning, but he opened his eyes briefly when I told him I was leaving the house for the rest of the day. He just wanted assurance that I’d be back in time for his dinner.
Sam doesn’t have a care in the world as he hangs o Sam doesn’t have a care in the world as he hangs out in may arms just before midnight. The rest of the office is dark, but we’re at a front window that has a light above it. I probably shouldn’t try to take a photo of a black cat when I’m wearing a black t-shirt. 😺
When I rubbed his head and told him I was leaving, When I rubbed his head and told him I was leaving, Alex started purring, but he didn’t seem inclined to wake up and chat about it.
It’s been a dark and rainy day Sunday, so there’s It’s been a dark and rainy day Sunday, so there’s no color of light left in the sky by the time sunset rolls around. Oliver is just watching the light rain that continues.
I just caught a funny scene in the darkened office I just caught a funny scene in the darkened office at 2:30 a.m. Sam was in an office window when Oliver jumped up there, making Sam feel trapped in the corner on the lower right. So Sam just went underneath Oliver to jump onto the fireplace mantle, from which he retired to the window on the other side. This is a good illustration of how much bigger Oliver is than Sam.
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Here’s the latest of my ridiculous parody shorts. It crossed my mind Tuesday to wonder what a slick and fast-talking car dealer might do right now to try to turn the high price of gasoline to his advantage. So I conceived of a fat and lovable character who tried to sell cars that don’t use any fuel — and then I started wondering if it would be funnier if all the characters were felines. Designing the King Cashpaw character took about four hours, but the rest took only another four hours, so this was a relatively quick piece that virtually wrote itself. I know it’s almost impossible for these parody videos to find a larger audience, but at least they amuse me — and there are 19 of them on my YouTube page now. The first few were very limited, but they’re getting more complex.

The Republican Party is dead. It still exists in name, of course, but it’s nothing but a shell. All that’s left are idiots and stooges and con men of the MAGA party. When Donald Trump is gone — which won’t be long — those populist idiots and pragmatic fools will have no one to follow. Democrats will thrive. They will take more power than ever and they will push the federal government further to the radical far left than ever. When that happens, don’t just blame Trump if you’re a conservative. Blame every person who has claimed to be a conservative and has given up on principles, character and everything else that Republicans once claimed to stand for. As someone who worked as a GOP political consultant for many years, this is disgusting and disturbing to me. Those who have enabled Trump to have almost unchecked power are going to be shocked when they see what they will unleash in the long run. It’s been plain all along what this narcissistic con man is. It’s your fault that you chose to pretend not to see what he really is.

We are ruled by the dumbest and most incompetent people among us — and we have a system which allows stupid and irresponsible people to force the costs of their idiocy onto smarter and wiser people. Can we get away with that? Yes, for quite some time. But we eventually reach a point at which the dumbest of the dumb — who are habitual liars and mentally ill fools — lead us to the disasters and destruction that some of us have seen coming for years. We are approaching that point. And yet most of the idiots around us still wave their rhetorical banners of support for the evil people who are leading us to ruin — and all of them point their fingers at someone else, never noticing that their own enthusiastic support of evil is to blame. When things finally fall apart, blame yourself for your blindness to the evil, not whoever happens to be in power when it happens.

I’ve been making some changes to the site lately and there are more changes coming in the days ahead, so don’t be surprised if you some small differences. This is not a wholesale redesign, but rather the addition of some features. Since they’re smarter than I am, I’ve put Oliver and Alex in charge of the technical work, which you can see in this action photo from the control room of our media complex. I recently added a series of landing pages for readers who randomly discover the site from an Internet search. I’ve also changed the YouTube link at the top of the page to go to the new YouTube channel for video essays that reflect things I’ve already published here. (Here’s a little bit about both of the YouTube channels I’m working on.) In addition, I’m trying to move away from using Instagram, so I’m experimenting with photo plug-ins that will eventually allow me to host the pictures — cats, dogs, sunsets, whatever — that I often take. So don’t be surprised to see more changes. Thanks for your patience. Let’s hope Alex and Oliver know what they’re doing.

I have no use for the theocratic and repressive government of Iran. The people who run the country are cruel at best and evil at worst. The Iranian people deserve freedom. But I have no personal quarrel with anybody in Iran. While I’m not thrilled about a future Iranian government having nuclear weapons, I’m just as concerned about nukes in the hands of politicians in Israel, Pakistan, India, China and Russia. I’m not even thrilled with the U.S., Britain and France having them, either, because I don’t trust any politicians to be responsible with such terrible weapons. All I can say with certainty is that American taxpayers have no business attacking Iran, especially since we’re being forced to pay for this attack in order to benefit the politicians of Israel — and nobody else. If Middle Eastern countries want to fight among themselves, that’s none of my business. It’s not the business of the U.S. government, either. I have no quarrel with anybody in Iran — and having the government which claims to represent me launch an unprovoked attack against a sovereign country will only make all Americans less safe in the near future. This attack is poorly conceived and morally unjustified. Remember that when the Iranians launch attacks that we will then condemn as “terrorism.” What the U.S. is doing right now looks like terrorism to me. And let’s not forget that the attack is the latest in a long line of unconstitutional wars by various U.S. presidents — who have no legal power to declare war on their own, according to the U.S. Constitution.

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