As I read aloud from the book, I could tell that my girlfriend was increasingly upset by what she was listening to. It was nearly a decade ago and my then-girlfriend and I had been learning more about ourselves by working our way through a personality system called ANSIR. I was reading a section of a book which discussed a long-term pairing of her type and my type.
“Then we don’t have any chance, do we?” she said with tears in her eyes once I finished.
I was at a stage in our relationship when I thought we probably should split up. For me, the book was just pointing out obvious problems between us that needed work. In a way, I was letting this book guide us toward the breakup that I thought I wanted and that I thought was right.
I’ve been thinking about that conversation lately and about a lot of the discussions she and I had during that period. Was I right in believing that our personality differences were driving our problems? Was she right in concluding we had no chance because of what the book said about our core differences?

Anatomy of a lie: Why destroy credibility by exaggerating facts?
I was a terrible preacher, because cookie-cutter truth seemed empty
11 children left orphaned by plane crash remind me how fickle life is
Making good art is really hard; getting paid for it is even harder
Warning, Good Samaritans: Offering teens a ride is ‘disturbing the peace’
Predictions of doom keep failing, so isn’t it rational to doubt them?
Shared misery: Nobody can have air conditioning unless everyone can
I feel hope for future, because truth is real and love is possible