David McElroy

It’s popular today to complain about our complicated and interconnected world and to yearn for simpler days. I’ve certainly felt that way at times. But I think we sometimes forget that we can’t have the things we want unless the world is complicated and interconnected.

There’s a famous essay published in 1958 by Leonard Read called “I, Pencil,” which explains where a pencil comes from — and how many people are required to produce a simple pencil. I read something today that considers a more modern example. Waldo Jaquith wrote earlier this week about the impracticality of a cheeseburger until modern times.

If you want a cheeseburger today, you can probably go to a dozen places within shouting distance of your home or office and get one pretty cheaply. But if you’d lived before the days of modern transportation and refrigeration and all the other things that make a cheeseburger possible, you wouldn’t have found one. It wasn’t that it technically impossible. It was simply that it was so difficult that it would have required tremendous resources to duplicate what we get cheaply today.

I’m not going to retell what made Jaquith start thinking about it. His piece is short and worth reading. Take a look for yourself. And remember it the next time you start longing for a simper life. You can have a simple world if you want it, but there are going to be a lot of tradeoffs. You might gain some things, but you’d give up even more. It’s worth thinking about what modern technology has brought us.

There’s been a serious breach in the secrecy of U.S. homeland security. A small newspaper in Michigan has accidentally leaked a key part of U.S. defense strategy. I’m hoping that “the terrorists” haven’t noticed yet, so let’s just keep this between you and me.

What’s the big secret? OK. Is it just us good guys listening? No dirty terrorists around? Good. Here’s the scoop. No pun intended.

The U.S. Department of Homeland Security is equipping counties all over the United States with Arctic Blast Sno-Cone machines. The pilot program is with 13 counties in Michigan, and that’s where the unfortunate secrecy leak happened. Here’s what those traitors at the newspaper were vile enough to report:

Montcalm County recently received a $900 Arctic Blast Sno-Cone machine.

The West Michigan Shoreline Regional Development Commission (WMSRDC) is a federal- and state-designated agency responsible for managing and administrating the homeland security program in Montcalm County and 12 other counties.

The WMSRDC recently purchased and transferred homeland security equipment to these counties — including 13 snow cone machines at a total cost of $11,700.

The machines were funded by a grant from the Michigan Homeland Security Program. The request for a snow cone machine came from another county, but all 13 counties received them.

Are you starting to get the picture here? The government is buying “snow cone machines” for counties. Yeah, right. Who would believe that one? They’re obviously secret weapons. There’s no other explanation.

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When I was growing up, I learned the standard Pearl Harbor attack story. The peaceful United States was minding its own business and staying out of the war raging in Europe when Japan suddenly attacked Pearl Harbor without any provocation. The Japanese were motivated simply by imperialist plans for conquest, we were assured.

I loved military history back then, and the war in the Pacific during World War II was my favorite. (If you ever want me to bore you with a detailed account of the Battle of Midway, I’ll be happy to do so, because it’s my favorite battle.) I have tremendous admiration for the people who fought that war and who sacrificed greatly in order to win it. Unfortunately, I can’t say the same thing about the political leaders whose actions led to the war.

When I was 12, I learned Franklin Roosevelt’s rousing speech on Dec. 8, 1941, asking Congress to declare war on Japan. (I can still do large parts of it, and I’m sure it’s funny to hear me emulate FDR’s accent.) I believed that Roosevelt was a great wartime leader.

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