David McElroy

I’ve been hurt — very badly — by someone I’ve loved. You’ve been hurt, too.

And since we know how badly broken trust feels, why is it that we choose to love again? Why do we choose to trust someone again? Once we’ve lived long enough to know what hurt feels like — and to know that someone else might very well leave us hurting once again — why do we trust?

I’ve been asking myself this question tonight. I don’t really like the answers I’m coming up with — but I don’t know another way to live.

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I joined Facebook in 2007 only because a girlfriend asked me to. Until early 2009, though, I posted nothing. I didn’t see why I needed this social media platform as part of my life.

After I started using Facebook, though, I became a heavy user as I connected with those who shared my political interests and then as I used it to promote the articles I wrote here. I fairly quickly reached the 5,000 limit on “friends,” but I eventually decided things were out of control with the angry arguments on my page.

Over the last few years, I’ve aggressively cut my number of contacts. (Let’s be honest. Most of them aren’t really friends.) I’ve cut it to just a few more than 500. I thought that might be enough for me to think it was worth sticking around.

I’ve recently realized, though, that I need to leave Facebook completely.

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I always find myself re-evaluating my direction at the end of each year. It’s an inward-looking exercise in navel-gazing, but it serves a broader purpose.

When we get stuck on the wrong course in life, it’s hard to change that. But it’s almost impossible to make the change unless we’re willing to be honest with ourselves about where we are. If we can see what we‘re doing to ourselves, we have a chance of making a correction. If not, we’re doomed to stay on the wrong course for life.

I’ve been conducting my annual year-end evaluation over the last few days. Oddly, I have two image stuck in my mind, one from the past and one from the future.

The first image relates to some advice my ex-wife gave me many years ago. I’ve always known she was right, but I’ve never quite figured out what to do with it. This year, I can’t get it out of my mind.

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