I’ve always believed it was my job to fix the world. To make everything perfect.
I never actually said that. I didn’t even consciously think it. But I walked through the world feeling a sort of panic — a desperation to fix things — that most people never experience.
Looking back, it’s obvious now where that fear came from. As I was growing up, my narcissistic father held me responsible for being perfect. I was punished for any deviation from what he thought was right and good. And he constantly judged everybody and everything around me.
Behind their backs, he ridiculed people who did things incorrectly. If he saw a public mistake — a timing error on a live television show or a typo in a newspaper, for instance — he used to tell me that someone must have been fired for the mistake. And I believed him.
I’m still afraid of my own imperfection. I still feel panic when I see others’ mistakes. After all these years, there’s still a nagging feeling inside that I have to fix everything — or else I’ll be punished.

Spoiled brat sues White Castle because he can’t fit into a booth
Cancer diagnosis forces you to decide what really matters in life
Our greatest apparent strengths frequently lead to our downfall
Sad, but true: Neither Ron Paul nor any libertarian has chance to win
Hidden crisis of missing intimacy leaves many ‘together all alone’
Who are you trying to impress? Answer may explain who you are
Angry reactions to others can make us wrong even when we’re right
My books are time machines that tell you where (and who) I’ve been
Unexpected proposal leaves me pondering my craving to be loved