For a very long time, I wondered how this would end. Would there be a dramatic climax? Or would love just slowly and quietly die from lack of tending?
It’s hard to even know what to call it anymore. It hasn’t been a relationship for a long time. It was a hope. Fondest dream. Futile faith in what a love might be? Fantasy, maybe?
Of all the things I imagined for seven years or so, I never imagined that it could end as sour grapes. But now that the hurt of lost love has faded into vague resentment instead, I can’t help but think, “I wouldn’t have wanted her anyway.”
I laugh bitterly at myself and wonder whether I tried to fool myself for years or if I’ve been trying to fool myself more recently. I’m not sure I would know when I’ve been most honest with myself — then or now — much less what was really best for all involved.
All I can do is point to Aesop’s fable called, “The Fox and the Grapes.” Do you remember the story?

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Some people hate their enemies so badly that fairness doesn’t matter
Don’t complain about debt when you borrow $35,000 to study puppetry
City rushes to demolish $4.5 million transit station after only 13 years
Social creatures: We heal each other, but start dying when alone
Learning to love and accept yourself can be your first step toward healing
It’s easy to learn wrong lessons from watching parent’s behavior
THE McELROY ZOO: Meet Lucy, the dog who used to live on a chain