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David McElroy

making sense of a dysfunctional culture

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Cop’s murder has me pondering why humans kill those they love

By David McElroy · May 4, 2019

I didn’t know Andy Kimbrel. I don’t know his widow, Stephanie Keller. But I can’t help but stare at this Facebook picture of them from less than a year ago — and wonder why she killed him Thursday night.

Kimbrel was a police officer in a safe and affluent suburb of Birmingham where I drive almost every day. I had never heard of either of them until police announced today that he was the victim of a murder in a domestic incident last night — and his widow has been charged with murder.

I have absolutely no idea what happened between them, so I have no opinion about whether it’s murder or if it’s justified in some way. I’m not even especially interested in that part of it right now. Instead, I find myself looking at this pair — who have been married only a couple of years — and wonder how it is that two people who seemed deeply in love could come to this.

Why do we humans tend to hurt or even kill the people we love?

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Filed Under: Uncategorized Tagged With: love, marriage, murder, psychology

Does change really come quickly? Or do we finally accept the truth?

By David McElroy · May 3, 2019

When change happens, it can seem like a bolt out of the blue.

It can seem as though we’re heading in one stable direction in life and then something changes without warning — suddenly upending all of our plans and assumptions and hopes.

But is that the way it works? Is the dramatic moment of change what we think it is — a shocking thing we didn’t see coming — or is it just the moment when we finally accept what should have been obvious long before?

I met a young woman earlier this week who really impressed me. When I was eating at a restaurant where I rarely go Monday evening, I kept noticing an attractive server and thinking she looked familiar. I finally invited her over and asked if we might have met.

As far as we could figure, we had never met, but we talked for 10 or 15 minutes. She was delightful. She was intelligent, charming, funny and beautiful. She was tall and had dark brown hair that made her bright blue eyes all the more striking.

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Filed Under: Uncategorized Tagged With: acceptance, change, love, reality, romance

Unexpected proposal leaves me pondering my craving to be loved

By David McElroy · May 2, 2019

If I had known dinner was going to come with a marriage proposal, I would have worn a tie.

I still don’t know what to think, much less what to feel. A beautiful young woman asked me tonight — just a few minutes ago — if I would marry her, but it was more like a business proposal or a marriage of convenience.

Kayla is 28 years old. (That’s not her real name, of course.) I’ve known her — not well enough to marry her, though — for about 10 years. She’s beautiful. She’s highly intelligent. She’s talented. And she has a great heart.

But shortly after college, things went terribly wrong in her life. She had family tragedies which she never imagined. And then she had to face personal demons — things none of us saw coming — which threatened to destroy her for good.

I hadn’t seen Kayla for five years. She ended up homeless at one point and I ran into her by chance at the worst of that crisis. She spent one night with me, but I lost track of her again after that. And then she asked to see me tonight.

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  • ‘This path leads to somewhere I think I can finally say, I’m home’
  • When love finally dies, it’s like a fever breaks and the pain is gone

Filed Under: Uncategorized Tagged With: love, marriage, proposal, psychology, romance

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My Instagram

This is the face of a man who’s thrilled that the This is the face of a man who’s thrilled that the weekend is finally here. It was a very long (and productive) week, but the time has finally come that I have time to write and read and think. Late Friday night, I’m at the McDonald’s near my house with a Diet Dr Pepper and a MacBook. For me, it’s like Cheers without the booze.
Donald Trump has figured out who to blame for the Donald Trump has figured out who to blame for the the D.C. Reflecting Pool turning green. The dastardly deed was carried out by a specially trained squad of Antifa cats trained by the Far Left. It’s not his fault. Arrest all the cats! #satire #parody
This was the sunset that faced me as I left Walmar This was the sunset that faced me as I left Walmart near my house just a few minutes ago. It was a beautiful light show for just a few minutes.
Here’s proof that reality and satire are indisting Here’s proof that reality and satire are indistinguishable these days.
This was the sunset I saw from the parking lot out This was the sunset I saw from the parking lot outside of the Walmart near my house just after the sun went down Friday evening.
This little parody was inspired by my trip to buy This little parody was inspired by my trip to buy gas a little while ago. Even at a no-name brand, the price was $4.09. If I remember correctly, it was $2.29 a gallon at the same station on the day the war started. I don’t know about you, but I’m tired of winning. 🤣
For the best and most sophisticated in lawn care, For the best and most sophisticated in lawn care, check out the sponsor of one of my upcoming YouTube video episodes. 🙃 #parody #threestooges
Have you felt as though you’re living through Grou Have you felt as though you’re living through Groundhog Day lately? Me, too. Here’s a quick-and-dirty political satire I made this evening for fun and stress relief.
About three minutes before sunrise, vibrant color About three minutes before sunrise, vibrant color is poking through the skies to the east of my back yard.
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Critter Instagram

From the CritterCam: Some of us are working on Mon From the CritterCam: Some of us are working on Monday morning, but Alex is heading back to bed — where most of us probably wish we could be.
When I got home just now, I couldn’t find Alex at When I got home just now, I couldn’t find Alex at first, but then I saw the tip of an ear sticking out from the top of the castle’s top level. When I got up to his level — up by the ceiling — I found an extremely lazy boy who was already bedded down for the night just before midnight. He didn’t even tell me good night.
When I got home just now, the lights were off in t When I got home just now, the lights were off in the office, so the only light illuminating Sam in an office window came from the streetlights outside.
It’s nice to have a little gray boy who always wan It’s nice to have a little gray boy who always wants lap time. I just came back home and picked up my MacBook to do some work, but Oliver insisted that he get my lap first for a few minutes. In the shot, most of his body is in my lap and he’s hanging over my left arm as he lies there purring.
From the CritterCam: It’s only mid morning Saturda From the CritterCam: It’s only mid morning Saturday, but Alex has already given up on the day. He’s going back to bed. That sounds like a great idea.
From the CritterCam: Around 4:30 a.m., Alex was ha From the CritterCam: Around 4:30 a.m., Alex was having an adventurous night in his bed, but he didn’t seem to be getting much sleep. 😺
I posted a photo Friday evening of what Oliver loo I posted a photo Friday evening of what Oliver looked like when he was jumping from my shoulder, but I probably should have included this shot. This is what he had been doing before he jumped onto my shoulder. The jumping pictures were about three minutes after this one.
When Oliver sits on my shoulder at a window, he of When Oliver sits on my shoulder at a window, he often reaches the point that he realizes he’s had enough of sitting on that narrow spot and he suddenly looks for the closest surface onto which to jump. I finally got a picture of this just now. I came home and he was eager for me to pick him up, but after looking out the window with me for a minute, he suddenly decided to jump — and I caught these two images of his leap. I love the second one.
Oliver woke up when I came home just now, but he d Oliver woke up when I came home just now, but he didn’t seem inclined to get out of the hanging basket. When I changed clothes and sat down in the bedroom, though, he was jumping up into my lap.
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It turns out that the radical far left has been training “Antifa cats” to sabotage anything important to Donald Trump. Everything he did was perfect. Honest. It was all the cats’ fault. Arrest all the cats! This is the latest of my ridiculous satirical shorts. Please go watch it. Then “like” it and subscribe. Please. I’m begging you. (Too much?) Although a couple of the previous videos have had views in the hundreds, most have still been seen by fewer than 20 people. So I seem to be having trouble letting people know that page exists.

Here’s the latest of my ridiculous parody shorts. It crossed my mind Tuesday to wonder what a slick and fast-talking car dealer might do right now to try to turn the high price of gasoline to his advantage. So I conceived of a fat and lovable character who tried to sell cars that don’t use any fuel — and then I started wondering if it would be funnier if all the characters were felines. Designing the King Cashpaw character took about four hours, but the rest took only another four hours, so this was a relatively quick piece that virtually wrote itself. I know it’s almost impossible for these parody videos to find a larger audience, but at least they amuse me — and there are 19 of them on my YouTube page now. The first few were very limited, but they’re getting more complex.

The Republican Party is dead. It still exists in name, of course, but it’s nothing but a shell. All that’s left are idiots and stooges and con men of the MAGA party. When Donald Trump is gone — which won’t be long — those populist idiots and pragmatic fools will have no one to follow. Democrats will thrive. They will take more power than ever and they will push the federal government further to the radical far left than ever. When that happens, don’t just blame Trump if you’re a conservative. Blame every person who has claimed to be a conservative and has given up on principles, character and everything else that Republicans once claimed to stand for. As someone who worked as a GOP political consultant for many years, this is disgusting and disturbing to me. Those who have enabled Trump to have almost unchecked power are going to be shocked when they see what they will unleash in the long run. It’s been plain all along what this narcissistic con man is. It’s your fault that you chose to pretend not to see what he really is.

We are ruled by the dumbest and most incompetent people among us — and we have a system which allows stupid and irresponsible people to force the costs of their idiocy onto smarter and wiser people. Can we get away with that? Yes, for quite some time. But we eventually reach a point at which the dumbest of the dumb — who are habitual liars and mentally ill fools — lead us to the disasters and destruction that some of us have seen coming for years. We are approaching that point. And yet most of the idiots around us still wave their rhetorical banners of support for the evil people who are leading us to ruin — and all of them point their fingers at someone else, never noticing that their own enthusiastic support of evil is to blame. When things finally fall apart, blame yourself for your blindness to the evil, not whoever happens to be in power when it happens.

I’ve been making some changes to the site lately and there are more changes coming in the days ahead, so don’t be surprised if you some small differences. This is not a wholesale redesign, but rather the addition of some features. Since they’re smarter than I am, I’ve put Oliver and Alex in charge of the technical work, which you can see in this action photo from the control room of our media complex. I recently added a series of landing pages for readers who randomly discover the site from an Internet search. I’ve also changed the YouTube link at the top of the page to go to the new YouTube channel for video essays that reflect things I’ve already published here. (Here’s a little bit about both of the YouTube channels I’m working on.) In addition, I’m trying to move away from using Instagram, so I’m experimenting with photo plug-ins that will eventually allow me to host the pictures — cats, dogs, sunsets, whatever — that I often take. So don’t be surprised to see more changes. Thanks for your patience. Let’s hope Alex and Oliver know what they’re doing.

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