• Skip to primary navigation
  • Skip to main content
  • Skip to primary sidebar
  • Skip to secondary sidebar
  • Email
  • Facebook
  • Instagram
  • YouTube

David McElroy

making sense of a dysfunctional culture

  • About David
  • New here?
  • Reading
  • Video

Does change really come quickly? Or do we finally accept the truth?

By David McElroy · May 3, 2019

When change happens, it can seem like a bolt out of the blue.

It can seem as though we’re heading in one stable direction in life and then something changes without warning — suddenly upending all of our plans and assumptions and hopes.

But is that the way it works? Is the dramatic moment of change what we think it is — a shocking thing we didn’t see coming — or is it just the moment when we finally accept what should have been obvious long before?

I met a young woman earlier this week who really impressed me. When I was eating at a restaurant where I rarely go Monday evening, I kept noticing an attractive server and thinking she looked familiar. I finally invited her over and asked if we might have met.

As far as we could figure, we had never met, but we talked for 10 or 15 minutes. She was delightful. She was intelligent, charming, funny and beautiful. She was tall and had dark brown hair that made her bright blue eyes all the more striking.

Keep Reading

Share on Social Networks

Related Posts

  • We’re neither friends nor enemies, just strangers who share the past
  • ‘This path leads to somewhere I think I can finally say, I’m home’
  • When love finally dies, it’s like a fever breaks and the pain is gone

Filed Under: Uncategorized Tagged With: acceptance, change, love, reality, romance

Unexpected proposal leaves me pondering my craving to be loved

By David McElroy · May 2, 2019

If I had known dinner was going to come with a marriage proposal, I would have worn a tie.

I still don’t know what to think, much less what to feel. A beautiful young woman asked me tonight — just a few minutes ago — if I would marry her, but it was more like a business proposal or a marriage of convenience.

Kayla is 28 years old. (That’s not her real name, of course.) I’ve known her — not well enough to marry her, though — for about 10 years. She’s beautiful. She’s highly intelligent. She’s talented. And she has a great heart.

But shortly after college, things went terribly wrong in her life. She had family tragedies which she never imagined. And then she had to face personal demons — things none of us saw coming — which threatened to destroy her for good.

I hadn’t seen Kayla for five years. She ended up homeless at one point and I ran into her by chance at the worst of that crisis. She spent one night with me, but I lost track of her again after that. And then she asked to see me tonight.

Keep Reading

Share on Social Networks

Related Posts

  • We’re neither friends nor enemies, just strangers who share the past
  • ‘This path leads to somewhere I think I can finally say, I’m home’
  • When love finally dies, it’s like a fever breaks and the pain is gone

Filed Under: Uncategorized Tagged With: love, marriage, proposal, psychology, romance

Separating religion, spirituality makes it harder to find the Truth

By David McElroy · May 1, 2019

I had a spiritual experience Wednesday evening, but I was nowhere near a church or a religious service.

I was looking through beautiful trees at sunset near my house and as I saw the sun break through the clouds and shine brightly through the branches, I was filled with the awe and joy which I experience so often when I’m close to Nature and the God of Nature.

I felt close to the Creator. I felt the joy of being connected to the Divine. I felt God’s presence in a powerful way. But there was nothing religious about the experience.

One of the saddest and most awful realizations of my adult life has been that religion and spirituality so rarely intersect in a direct way. I grew up immersed in religion and occasionally having spiritual experiences, but I’ve seen modern culture doing its best to separate these two things — and that hurts everyone who’s genuinely searching for the Truth.

Keep Reading

Share on Social Networks

Related Posts

  • End of life brought cancer patient to baptism six days before death
  • Watching kids on a Friday night reminds me of struggle to belong
  • Smallest ray of hope can make us feel a change we need is coming

Filed Under: Uncategorized Tagged With: church, community, religion, spiritual, spirituality

  • ⪡
  • Page 1
  • Interim pages omitted …
  • Page 197
  • Page 198
  • Page 199
  • Page 200
  • Page 201
  • Interim pages omitted …
  • Page 694
  • ⪢

Primary Sidebar

My Instagram

This was the sunset I saw from the parking lot out This was the sunset I saw from the parking lot outside of the Walmart near my house just after the sun went down Friday evening.
This little parody was inspired by my trip to buy This little parody was inspired by my trip to buy gas a little while ago. Even at a no-name brand, the price was $4.09. If I remember correctly, it was $2.29 a gallon at the same station on the day the war started. I don’t know about you, but I’m tired of winning. 🤣
For the best and most sophisticated in lawn care, For the best and most sophisticated in lawn care, check out the sponsor of one of my upcoming YouTube video episodes. 🙃 #parody #threestooges
Have you felt as though you’re living through Grou Have you felt as though you’re living through Groundhog Day lately? Me, too. Here’s a quick-and-dirty political satire I made this evening for fun and stress relief.
About three minutes before sunrise, vibrant color About three minutes before sunrise, vibrant color is poking through the skies to the east of my back yard.
The lights and color might have been more spectacu The lights and color might have been more spectacular a couple of minutes before this, but this was the best view I had of the Monday afternoon sunset from a bridge over I-20 in Moody, Ala.
I just remembered this shot I got a couple of hour I just remembered this shot I got a couple of hours ago of the fading sunset while I was in the Publix parking lot on the way home. If you suddenly find yourself craving Arby’s or Wendy’s, blame the giant icons in the sky, not me. 😃 (BTW, this was with the iPhone’s 8X telephoto lens.) #nature #naturephotography #sunset #birmingham #alabama
I had just pulled into a parking lot Friday night I had just pulled into a parking lot Friday night and was watching traffic through the distortion of the gently falling rain on my car window when I realized that the abstract view I had matched the way I was feeling tonight, so I turned it into a brief abstract video to match my mood.
Get ready for the next great animated Christmas cl Get ready for the next great animated Christmas classic, featuring singing and dancing and danger from Alex, Oliver and Sam. Coming soon to a theater near you. (The funniest part is that if I cared about this as anything more than a Christmas joke, it strikes me as something that could be profitable with the right story development and the right animators.)
Follow on Instagram

Critter Instagram

I’ve been on the phone for the last couple of hour I’ve been on the phone for the last couple of hours and the house was completely quiet when I ended the call. I discovered all three of the cats sound asleep in the office. Alex woke up enough to see if I was bringing anything for him, but neither Oliver nor Sam even stirred.
For a long time, Sam found it impossible to relax For a long time, Sam found it impossible to relax like this in my arms. Even now, he would rather lie on the bed than on me, but it’s satisfying to see him learn to trust me enough to stretch out and relax. I’ve had a few feral cats in the past who never got even this far on the road to complete trust.
When I got back home just after 1 a.m., I found th When I got back home just after 1 a.m., I found that Alex hadn’t waited up for me. He roused himself just enough to give this enormous yawn and then he was back to sleep. It’s a good thing I know he isn’t going to use those teeth on me. He could be dangerous.
I just caught Sam spying on me from across the roo I just caught Sam spying on me from across the room as he peeks over the edge of the bed.
We’re having one more slightly cool day and Alex i We’re having one more slightly cool day and Alex is spending the afternoon on the heated pad as a result. Since you can see the CritterCam on the left side of the frame, I’ll include the angle that camera sees, too.
It’s been six months since I lost Lucy. I like to It’s been six months since I lost Lucy. I like to believe she’s patiently waiting at the gates of heaven — ready for the reunion when I meet her again one day.

I still think about this sweet and faithful companion every single day. If you’ve ever had a dog who you loved, you’ll understand.

When I put the key into my front door when I return home each day, part of me still waits to hear the sound of her tail hitting the door as she realizes I’ve returned.

When I get up in the morning, part of me still feels compelled to get her leash and take her for the first walk of the day — something she loved so much. At night, part of me wants to take her for one last walk before bed, because each walk made her so happy.

But I can’t do those things, because the World’s Happiest Dog isn’t here anymore.

I no longer have an excited companion every time I go on a short trip in the car. I no longer have a sweet and beautiful girl who looks at me with love and adoration every day. I no longer have someone who wants to lie at my feet as I work at my desk.

It’s a privilege to be trusted with the life and well-being of a dog. It’s an honor to win the love and affection of such a companion. And the truth is that some of them are more special to us than others. For me, Lucy was one of those.

I don’t have any insight into the theology surrounding animals in the afterlife, but I like to believe they’re there, too.

Because if Lucy isn’t there when I die — and if some of my other dearly loved dogs and cats aren’t there — I’m not sure we could really call it heaven.

I miss you, Lucy. Wherever you are, I like to think you miss me, too.

And I like to think I’ll see you again one of these days.
Oliver and Alex have been chasing each other aroun Oliver and Alex have been chasing each other around the bedroom and office for much of the evening. As Alex walks across the bedroom, he doesn’t seem aware that Oliver is still tracking him. Right after this, Oliver pounced on him and the chase was on once again.
Sam is a lot more willing to tolerate me now than Sam is a lot more willing to tolerate me now than he was when he first came in from the street about 18 months ago.
Early Wednesday afternoon, Alex is relaxing on the Early Wednesday afternoon, Alex is relaxing on the castle as he waits for the storms we’re expecting later today.
Follow on Instagram

Contact David

David likes email, but can’t reply to every message. I get a surprisingly large number of requests for relationship advice — seriously — but time doesn’t permit a response to all of them. (Sorry.)

Subscribe

Enter your address to receive notifications by email every time new articles are posted. Then click “Subscribe.”

Search

Donations

If you enjoy this site and want to help, click here. All donations are appreciated, no matter how large or small. (PayPal often doesn’t identify donors, so I might not be able to thank you directly.)




Archives

Secondary Sidebar

Briefly

We are ruled by the dumbest and most incompetent people among us — and we have a system which allows stupid and irresponsible people to force the costs of their idiocy onto smarter and wiser people. Can we get away with that? Yes, for quite some time. But we eventually reach a point at which the dumbest of the dumb — who are habitual liars and mentally ill fools — lead us to the disasters and destruction that some of us have seen coming for years. We are approaching that point. And yet most of the idiots around us still wave their rhetorical banners of support for the evil people who are leading us to ruin — and all of them point their fingers at someone else, never noticing that their own enthusiastic support of evil is to blame. When things finally fall apart, blame yourself for your blindness to the evil, not whoever happens to be in power when it happens.

I’ve been making some changes to the site lately and there are more changes coming in the days ahead, so don’t be surprised if you some small differences. This is not a wholesale redesign, but rather the addition of some features. Since they’re smarter than I am, I’ve put Oliver and Alex in charge of the technical work, which you can see in this action photo from the control room of our media complex. I recently added a series of landing pages for readers who randomly discover the site from an Internet search. I’ve also changed the YouTube link at the top of the page to go to the new YouTube channel for video essays that reflect things I’ve already published here. (Here’s a little bit about both of the YouTube channels I’m working on.) In addition, I’m trying to move away from using Instagram, so I’m experimenting with photo plug-ins that will eventually allow me to host the pictures — cats, dogs, sunsets, whatever — that I often take. So don’t be surprised to see more changes. Thanks for your patience. Let’s hope Alex and Oliver know what they’re doing.

I have no use for the theocratic and repressive government of Iran. The people who run the country are cruel at best and evil at worst. The Iranian people deserve freedom. But I have no personal quarrel with anybody in Iran. While I’m not thrilled about a future Iranian government having nuclear weapons, I’m just as concerned about nukes in the hands of politicians in Israel, Pakistan, India, China and Russia. I’m not even thrilled with the U.S., Britain and France having them, either, because I don’t trust any politicians to be responsible with such terrible weapons. All I can say with certainty is that American taxpayers have no business attacking Iran, especially since we’re being forced to pay for this attack in order to benefit the politicians of Israel — and nobody else. If Middle Eastern countries want to fight among themselves, that’s none of my business. It’s not the business of the U.S. government, either. I have no quarrel with anybody in Iran — and having the government which claims to represent me launch an unprovoked attack against a sovereign country will only make all Americans less safe in the near future. This attack is poorly conceived and morally unjustified. Remember that when the Iranians launch attacks that we will then condemn as “terrorism.” What the U.S. is doing right now looks like terrorism to me. And let’s not forget that the attack is the latest in a long line of unconstitutional wars by various U.S. presidents — who have no legal power to declare war on their own, according to the U.S. Constitution.

A child having a tantrum understands only one thing: Did I get my way or not? He doesn’t understand the issues involved. He doesn’t understand the reasons that went into a decision. He doesn’t understand any of the things that mature and reasonable adults have to understand in order to live healthy lives. By his reaction to the U.S. Supreme Court’s ruling to strike down his disastrous tariff scheme, Donald Trump shows himself to be — once more — a screaming child having a tantrum. Outside the world of mob bosses who expect to get their way every time, normal adults don’t act this way, but Trump isn’t normal. He’s an angry and vengeful man who has narcissistic personality disorder. And we are in danger as a result. Trump doesn’t understand the legal issues involved in this ruling. He doesn’t understand economics. He doesn’t understand rule of law. He doesn’t understand that he can ever be wrong. All he understands is that he didn’t get his way. And he is now a narcissistic and raging little boy who also happens to hold life-and-death power over most humans on this planet. He’s dangerous — and the system which gives him that power is even more dangerous.

Is it an attempt to blur the gender line between men and women? Or is it some weird tribute to the traditional Scottish kilt? It’s hard to say, but fashion designers keep pushing for men to wear skirts in the last few years. Both men and women in modern fashion seem oddly androgynous, as though it would be offensive for a man to look manly or for a woman to look feminine. A CNN article about the latest fashions from Paris caught my attention Monday and left me wondering about the ugly clothes the designers are hawking. If a man wants to wear a skirt — or a kilt — that’s OK with me, but I’ll stick with a traditional dark suit with a white shirt and tie. (Well, when I’m not wearing t-shirts and sweats, of course.) I always wonder who actually buys the outlandish garb from fashion designers anyway. I would be humiliated to be seen in any of this stuff, but I obviously have no sense of high fashion.

Read More

Crass Capitalism

Before you buy anything from Amazon, please click on this link. I’ll get a tiny commission, but it won’t cost you a nickel extra. The cats and Lucy will thank you. And so will I.

© 2011–2026 · All Rights Reserved
Built by: 1955 DESIGN