Whatever goes wrong in our lives, there’s always someone else to blame. Always.
The boss wouldn’t give me a chance. The woman I loved cheated on me. The man I married turned out to be an abuser. He was a terrible father. My friend made me start using drugs and partying all the time. I had to go into debt because all my friends had nice things and I had to keep up with them. I didn’t get the education I needed. I’m fat and nobody likes me.
Our excuses are endless. But even when our justifications for ourselves are completely accurate, there was always someone else who ultimately had control. And even if we got into a terrible situation — or a hundred terrible situations — there’s always someone who can take control to fix things and make our lives better.
It can be a painful shock to accept that the man in the mirror — or the woman in the mirror — almost always has the power to turn a miserable life into a satisfying life.
But it’s easier to blame someone else and ignore the man in the mirror. I’ve done that at times. Maybe you have, too.

Pursuing transcendent meaning is rebellion against modern culture
Confirmation bias means most of us assume our opponents are ‘morans’
Loving a depressed person means holding tightly on trips through hell
The more I understand humans, the less I believe we’ll ever all get along
Dear Donald Trump: Want a deal? You can buy my transcripts cheap
My old fear of looking foolish is strong incentive to do good work
Can a free society tolerate intrusions into details of ‘The Lives of Others’?
AUDIO: I need to reject a popular but emotionally dangerous path