David McElroy

making sense of a dysfunctional culture

home

‘This path leads to somewhere I think I can finally say, I’m home’

By ·

I don’t know how to get home. I’m not sure I’ve ever been there.

I’m not from this place. Not really. Yes, I was born here. On this planet, in this state, not far from where I sit. But I look around and know with certainty these are not my people. I don’t really understand them and they don’t understand me. We might as well be from different planets.

I’ve been looking for home since I was a small child. We didn’t stay any place for very long. From the beginning, it was a painful blur.

Birmingham, Washington, Atlanta, Knoxville, Meridian, Anniston, Oak Grove, Pensacola, Jasper.

It was a long line of new places, new people, new situations. I had a mother, then I didn’t. I had stability, then I didn’t. I craved love and attention and approval, but being perfect was the only way I knew to pursue them. And I wasn’t perfect.

I’ve longed for something all my life. I didn’t know what to call it. I’ve longed to find my home.

Keep Reading

Related Posts

Fixing what’s broken inside often makes things worse until rebirth

By ·

The world is full of abandoned and broken houses. Many of them are grand old buildings which were allowed to fall into ruin. Some still look beautiful on the outside. They’ve been left to fall apart on the inside, though, because someone decided they weren’t worth the trouble and expense to save — to repair and make whole again.

The world is also full of broken people. Many look normal from the outside, but on the inside, they’re dysfunctional and falling apart. Most don’t even understand how broken they are. They’re full of invisible damage from their past. They hurt others and they hurt themselves, because it’s all they know to do.

These broken people need repair. They need to be made whole. Even if they figure out how much change they need, they often drift aimlessly or thrash about in pain and confusion.

I know this so well because it’s been my own path for many years.

Keep Reading

Related Posts

Marriage is a business decision, not just matter of romantic love

By ·

The husband or wife you choose is the most important business partner you will ever have — and the family you create together is the most important business organization of your life.

We have been taught by our culture to see marriage as little more than two people magically brought together by fate and chance. Our movies teach us this. Our fairy tales teach us this, too. But those stories almost always end when the two people ultimately come together. We’re told they “lived happily ever after,” but we never see what that looks like.

Romantic love is very important to me. I’ve written multiple times about the ways in which the heart knows what it wants — often for reasons which aren’t clear to the rational mind. But if you choose to follow romantic love alone — and follow the model of family which culture is teaching us today — you will be throwing away your most valuable material asset.

And if you choose that path, you’re setting yourself up for a miserable family.

Keep Reading

Related Posts